#apologetic
I took my first wrong turn
when I took you so for granted,
I was so relieved to wake up next to you.
I’m so used to making my world burn,
or making sure that it stays slanted,
perhaps I should stop writing in red and start with blue.
You want to know what was my worst mistake,
it was watching your heart break
to prevent a fracture of my own.
I need to stop doing things only for my sake;
can’t eat and have my own cake,
each day is just a loan.
I see colours from and around you
but I always paint shades of grey,
we can argue that the pictures beautiful all the same.
Analyze shadows, shades and each hue,
we can always find a sun ray;
we’ve perfected it into our own type of game.
You want to know what was my worst regret,
was making your eyes turn wet
to keep my own dry.
I’d place all I own left on a bet
that it’s something we both won’t forget,
I wish that was a lie.
I committed my worst crime
based upon my biggest sin,
you’re so faithful; truth is I don’t deserve you.
“This won’t happen a second time,
I’d rather trade off my soul and my skin
spend the rest of my life held together with tape and glue.”
You want to know what was my worst mistake,
it was watching your heart break
to prevent a fracture of my own.
Share consequences from the choices I make,
it causes me to burn and ache
right down to the bone.
Jun 13, 2025
Jun 13, 2025 at 11:53 PM UTC
I met you and things were great for a few years
Then things went south and you told me I hurt you
It pained me to see your tears
The way everything played out left me feeling blue
That’s a strange emotion, I know
It wasn’t all on me
I think we can recover from this emotional blow
We can move forward, you’ll see
I know I did something wrong
We treated each other like such a prize
I have to make myself strong
So with that said, I apologize
Jun 7, 2025
Jun 7, 2025 at 11:19 PM UTC
My dear, I am sorry for what I have done.
The past continues to haunt my present day actions and feelings, and I feel that has shown time and time again.
I sincerely apoligise for me being so clingy. Clingy enough to make you stay away from me.
I sincerely apoligise for me being so oblivious and idiotic whenever we talk. I often don't realise that you want to drop a certain topic, or that you are generally uncomfortable with whatever situation I put you in.
Please understand that I've never meant to cause you mental anguish, but instead, love and endless support.
I know that, in the end, you doubt most of what I say.
And I wish that I could so something to make that distrust go away.
Maybe someday you'll see the light in between the scenes.
Or perhaps someday the darkness of the scenes will overwhelm us both, and we will no longer have the need to worry.
Please come back soon... I miss you, and I need you here in my arms.
All the love,
Samael
Jan 31, 2020
Jan 31, 2020 at 10:29 PM UTC
When choice is not a matter of heart
Or sight a glance at sun kissed chin
Arise my dawning love, arise
Don't look away
I'm not sorry that we must being
Jan 30, 2020
Jan 30, 2020 at 12:09 PM UTC
Sometimes I'm an apathist,
Infrequently an anarchist,
Mostly an apologetic aesthete,
And almost never myself.
_Whatever...f$@k it...sorry...hello._
Dec 7, 2019
Dec 7, 2019 at 9:02 PM UTC
People will keep talking
But I don't have to listen
Others will continue to expect
And define my existence
They will try to take away
What's left of my childlike innocence
And even then, the things I do
Are still none of their business
How can I feel okay?
When they become restless
From me not conforming to their way
They only see it as reckless
Their shallow mouths spew words
Bringing upon damage that is endless
With the naive intentions to help
Yet, why do I feel more helpless?
Childhood criticisms cling to me
Leaving me defenceless
Whenever the guards of my walls
Become tired and careless
I thought it'd be easier to live
If I was just passive and selfless
Until I was driven to the point
Where I couldn't tell what was precious
I have now accepted that it is okay
That I do not share the same ethics
The differences found in me
Should not make me so apologetic
Aug 17, 2019
Aug 17, 2019 at 3:05 AM UTC
I'm too much
and
yet not enough!
~SacredInkedBlood
©2018
Sep 23, 2018
Sep 23, 2018 at 3:55 AM UTC
All that remains
Chalk that wrote our story
I absentmindedly erased
Essence of our core
Still searching
For the lines of us
Lost somewhere
Amongst the dust
My inspiration slowly fading
Sinking in quicksand
With no hopes of wading
I will always be waiting
Rising from the depths
Of my past life
Paper bound
And
Apologetic
Praying to all gods
That I don’t repeat
The same mistakes
Pleading woefully
For heavens sake
Desperately hoping
I don’t know how much more I can take
Sep 5, 2018
Sep 5, 2018 at 8:16 PM UTC
I’m sorry.
Dreadfully so.
Your hearts a mess-
so skillfully trying
to weave its way
through mine.
But I’ve already began
cutting the ties.
I don’t want your love.
I won’t lie; not to you.
I’m sorry
Aug 30, 2018
Aug 30, 2018 at 1:32 PM UTC
I shouldn't be...sorry
I couldn't be...sorry
I can't be...sorry
I won't be...sorry
Why should I be...sorry?
How could I be...sorry?
Why can't I be...sorry?
Sorry.
Sorrow.
Sullied.
Serried.
I should be proud of the smile I wear, right?
...no?
...I'm sorry...
Jul 24, 2017
Jul 24, 2017 at 6:00 AM UTC
I’m sorry
I wear my body like an apology
I’m sorry
I take up so much space
I’m sorry
I speak quietly
Or not at all
Because my voice takes up so much space
And what if someone else wants to talk?
I’m sorry
I push you away
And I’m sorry
I’m insecure
And I’m sorry
I apologize so much.
Aug 17, 2016
Aug 17, 2016 at 11:08 PM UTC
I look up to a pale blue sky
With apologetic eyes
And a heart so very filled
With dim.
Take me back
To the empty box I was
Before I began feeding myself
Gin and jokes of grim.
God, please wash me off my sin,
Or take this foolish thick layer
Of skin.
-- Eleanor
May 7, 2016
May 7, 2016 at 8:07 AM UTC
The feelings inside me was enough to **** me. Us pulling up in his car just to see you come out of yours. The high disappeared. The vibes were gone. My heart began to pound louder than a drum on Chinese new year. You were heading our way.
I felt it. Your disappointment and anger. The look of betrayal written all over your face. You were keeping it all together when you really wanted to fall apart.
And there we were. All three of us standing in front of each other. Twas a night of good vibes ended up in a sour taste. All because I thought you wouldn't have understood. And there we were.
As one parted his way, you grabbed my hand and we started to walk away from the venue. I looked at you as you looked ahead. And all that was running through my head was to get away from you. When I had no right to. I watched you yell and scream for what felt like an eternity. I felt your pain and displeasure, all while I tried to prove an invalid point; trying to make it seem like you were wrong when it was actually me.
I heard you say words I've never heard you use before. I watched your eyes danced with madness, your pupils widening into great pools of rage and at the end all dim down with a flow of tears.
I wanted to hug you. I wanted to say I was sorry. I wanted to tell you that I didn't want to hurt you and that I had made some stupid decisions. But I didn't. Pride held me back and ego covered my mouth. Instead I watch you cry. It was unbelievable.
You drove me home that night. Nothing was said for a good 20 minutes. Then you pulled up into a parking lot to a highway hotel by the I15, where we began to talk again. Ego didn't silence me and pride didn't restrain me. We talked for what felt like hours when it was really 15 minutes. Then we were at my house. Where you hugged me good night. The smell of white amber and cardamom filled my nose... and then you drove away..
A lot happened that night. It was one of the many nights I said to myself I was never going to hurt you like that again........and I'm sorry.
Apr 7, 2016
Apr 7, 2016 at 5:51 AM UTC
By Arcassin Burnham
everyday that we don't talk,
I swear I just lose my mind,
I'm drowning in pain,
Losing track of time,
Is it headaches or grime,
I just hope we haven't lost our time,
Hoping everything will suffice,
And even though it's dead,
And it's made up,
I put the painkillers in a cup
Behind the T.v,
Thinking about the recent history
We had but instead...
Love I don't mind,
Putting trust in me that I thought
I had in myself,
I would have it any other way
Good and bad health,
Why won't you trust me,
Lissy,
I don't mind.
______________________________
Three headed hell-pits,
Lingering at my soul,
Head or tales , take your pick,
Your teenage soul's set old,
Learning,
All about my past,
The breaking of the wine glass,
Hearts cold , but filled with decadence,
Days of the unknown,
Walking through diamond valley,
These Mists get a little clearer,
But you gotta get the clearer picture,
Don't call your friends
And get drunk,
Why are these hearts so cold?
Rorschachs all over my face,
Be glad that it's not mold,
Learning
That you'll never be mine again,
And we'll never be more than
Acquaintances,
Now-a-days its a little personal,
I can endure a little hate and discrimination,
And your determination to ridicule,
Just know...
...I don't mind if its you.
Sep 12, 2015
Sep 12, 2015 at 12:25 AM UTC
I'm sorry for the lonely,
I'm sorry for the mad.
I'm sorry for the poor,
For the things they ever want.
I'm sorry for the hungry,
I'm sorry for the bad.
I'm sorry for the rich,
Never contented of what they had.
I'm sorry for the fool,
I'm sorry for that lad,
For that girl who trusted him
For his gift of broken heart
I'm sorry for the world.
I'm sorry for those blood,
I'm sorry for these sins,
Oh please forgive me God.
© Leigh Herondale
Jul 25, 2015
Jul 25, 2015 at 8:53 AM UTC
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, ok?
I'm sorry that I acted that way.
I acted irrationally,
Because I thought it was you I should've hated.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
It probably doesn't mean that much.
But I mean it with all of my stubborn, ******* heart.
Will you ever forgive me?
Please?
May 28, 2015
May 28, 2015 at 6:07 PM UTC
A fatal flaw
of selflessness
that is humbling
on paper
but self-destructive.
Nov 27, 2014
Nov 27, 2014 at 4:52 AM UTC
The days I am happy
There is nothing wrong
It is as white as a blank sheet of paper
The days I am sad
Are as dark as the winter nights
When you told me you loved me
And then called me just to say
"Baby you didn't mean a God **** thing"
Oct 20, 2014
Oct 20, 2014 at 8:02 PM UTC
I left the person who loved me for the person who lusted after me.
Oct 14, 2014
Oct 14, 2014 at 1:58 PM UTC
Sorry Mommy, I'm not the better daughter
I'm sorry, Daddy, I wasn't what you wanted
I'm sorry I'm not good enough yet
I'm sorry I for everything I never said
I'm sorry I'm a overweight, I'll fix it I swear
I'm sorry I'm cutting, but I need it to keep me sane
I'm sorry I smoke, but it's my replacement for air
I'm sorry
I'm sorry
I'm crying
I'm sorry
There's no point to this
I've already ruined everything
I'm so, so, so sorry
Sorry.
Sorry.
I know it doesn't help.
Sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I can't make up for what I've done.
But I am sorry.
I'm sorry I was born
I know you didn't expect me
I'm sorry I wasn't born a boy
I'm sorry I acted to much like you
I'm sorry I made you hate me
I'm sorry I'm annoying
I'm sorry I'm not perfect
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for everything.
Whatever you don't like about me
I'm sorry it's there
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I cry so much
I'm sorry I'm not pretty
I'm sorry I left
I'm sorry
Sorry.
I'm so sorry
I don't know what else to apologize for
I'm sorry you have to spend money on me
I'm sorry I don't know what to be sorry for
I'm sorry I said I hated you
I'm sorry
I'm so sorry
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I'm not useful yet
I'm sorry I don't make all A's
I'm sorry I don't get math
I'm sorry I don't like science
I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry you don't love me.
I'm sorry I want you to.
I'm sorry
I'm so very sorry
I'm sorry I don't call you Mommy anymore
I'm sorry I don't call you Daddy anymore
I'm sorry
I'm sorry you have to be my parents
I'm sorry I'm not good enough
I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I know it's not enough
Sorry.
Aug 21, 2013
Aug 21, 2013 at 8:27 AM UTC