#anciety - Hello Poetry

Many times, I cannot breathe. Many times, I lose my breath, That blow to my chest. I need a dark room, to be able to scream. My mind always sees tragedy. Only thoughts, without owners. My hands sweat. A sense of panic, burning my soul. Many times, I leave things unfinished. Many times, I see walls before my future. I see chaos and catastrophe. You are my dark side, you are my ordeal. You are an emotion, that lasts two seconds. You will not control my life. I just need... to breathe. I will not die. I just need... to breathe. I have not lost my mind. I just need... to breathe. I just need... to breathe.

0

Mar 20, 2025

Mar 20, 2025 at 4:35 AM UTC

identified

Two Seconds

Many times, I cannot breathe. Many times, I lose my breath, That blow to my chest. I need a dark room, to be able to scream. My mind always sees tragedy. Only thoughts, without owners. My hands sweat. A sense of panic, burning my soul. Many times, I leave things unfinished. Many times, I see walls before my future. I see chaos and catastrophe. You are my dark side, you are my ordeal. You are an emotion, that lasts two seconds. You will not control my life. I just need... to breathe. I will not die. I just need... to breathe. I have not lost my mind. I just need... to breathe. I just need... to breathe.

35

Another landmark added To my skin I seem to have done it again Under the harsh light That falls from the solitary bulb I bend the pocket knife Just above the wrist And Watch with hallow eyes As it bleeds Out of my arms Into the tiles, Unto the floor Blood, Oh blood, so red. I marvel at how red it always Remain Never matter if it’s a Razor or knife I use To draw it It’s always red And I half expect It to be black Black like charcoal, Charcoal which paints my ruins I can die nine times Alas, this one only being the fifth How long can I keep up With this air Being ****** out of me Day by day, Second by second I push anyone Who comes too close To me Afraid I might damage Them too Like I damage myself In every life When I dabble In hellfire.

0

Dec 30, 2018

Dec 30, 2018 at 2:28 PM UTC

moonchild009

Eleazar

Another landmark added To my skin I seem to have done it again Under the harsh light That falls from the solitary bulb I bend the pocket knife Just above the wrist And Watch with hallow eyes As it bleeds Out of my arms Into the tiles, Unto the floor Blood, Oh blood, so red. I marvel at how red it always Remain Never matter if it’s a Razor or knife I use To draw it It’s always red And I half expect It to be black Black like charcoal, Charcoal which paints my ruins I can die nine times Alas, this one only being the fifth How long can I keep up With this air Being ****** out of me Day by day, Second by second I push anyone Who comes too close To me Afraid I might damage Them too Like I damage myself In every life When I dabble In hellfire.

42

I found my boots where I discarded them five hours ago when I left for work I shouldn't have been surprised- I knew I had put them there I just usually don't My boss was still around when I got there He put me on an hour earlier for Fridays, so I suppose I'll see him every once in awhile now When it's just a little too early for him to go home I hate leaving for seven am in the dark with my hair wet Distant shuffling noises, echoed ghosts of late last night Shadows I can't understand Only cut through by kind people who make breakfast when I can't pull myself together Our habitat is warm- it surrounds me like a rainforest exhibit in a museum Somehow not unfamiliar, or exotic, Exactly like you expected, Exactly like the pictures I fell asleep at noon when I got home Late nights to early mornings to interviews for a real job Late nights to early mornings to nursing classes So it goes I don't remember when my socks came off When I crawled into bed When I woke up half alive I wouldn't have remembered to leave for work at all if I hadn't set an alarm late last night when I got home "I can't believe I'm doing this." No time at home, just notes and then more notes and then Sleep, I guess Sleep and work and sleep at work as long as I'm on break Not breaking focus, eyes on some sort of goal I can't quite see yet But it's there, I know it's there, I've heard it, like a rumor spread so many **** times you can't help but believe it like the most obvious fact So I'm here, straight as an arrow Shorts on, notebook out, letting my tea seep into my spirit and fill in all the cracks before I start over

0

Jan 20, 2018

Jan 20, 2018 at 10:44 PM UTC

rosey-b

Before I Start Over

I found my boots where I discarded them five hours ago when I left for work I shouldn't have been surprised- I knew I had put them there I just usually don't My boss was still around when I got there He put me on an hour earlier for Fridays, so I suppose I'll see him every once in awhile now When it's just a little too early for him to go home I hate leaving for seven am in the dark with my hair wet Distant shuffling noises, echoed ghosts of late last night Shadows I can't understand Only cut through by kind people who make breakfast when I can't pull myself together Our habitat is warm- it surrounds me like a rainforest exhibit in a museum Somehow not unfamiliar, or exotic, Exactly like you expected, Exactly like the pictures I fell asleep at noon when I got home Late nights to early mornings to interviews for a real job Late nights to early mornings to nursing classes So it goes I don't remember when my socks came off When I crawled into bed When I woke up half alive I wouldn't have remembered to leave for work at all if I hadn't set an alarm late last night when I got home "I can't believe I'm doing this." No time at home, just notes and then more notes and then Sleep, I guess Sleep and work and sleep at work as long as I'm on break Not breaking focus, eyes on some sort of goal I can't quite see yet But it's there, I know it's there, I've heard it, like a rumor spread so many **** times you can't help but believe it like the most obvious fact So I'm here, straight as an arrow Shorts on, notebook out, letting my tea seep into my spirit and fill in all the cracks before I start over

30

1 2 3 4 5 I count things in 5’s one cat two cat three cat hula hoop tote bag My notes are organized Cornell style but it can’t fill the void you left. Light switch one slipper two slippers lotion candle I’ve got my life organized down to the the minutes but you aren’t in any of them. Long distance. We’ll see.

0

Jun 23, 2017

Jun 23, 2017 at 9:58 AM UTC

Kissheagley

5's

1 2 3 4 5 I count things in 5’s one cat two cat three cat hula hoop tote bag My notes are organized Cornell style but it can’t fill the void you left. Light switch one slipper two slippers lotion candle I’ve got my life organized down to the the minutes but you aren’t in any of them. Long distance. We’ll see.

22

Louder The music has to go louder Loud isn't loud enough I need their screams to wash out the voices on my head I need the screeches to cover the burning of my soul It's not enough It's never enough It'll never be enough I can still hear myself I don't want to hear myself My soul eats at me I need my mind to be overpowered It can't get loud enough Nothing covers the burning inside Each though is a shard knife digging through my mind Paranoid schizophrenic Borderline Bipolar Depressed OCD Anxiety I am not a human I am a list of problems And therefore I must leave

0

Apr 28, 2015

Apr 28, 2015 at 9:14 AM UTC

ash-saveman

Mind Game

Louder The music has to go louder Loud isn't loud enough I need their screams to wash out the voices on my head I need the screeches to cover the burning of my soul It's not enough It's never enough It'll never be enough I can still hear myself I don't want to hear myself My soul eats at me I need my mind to be overpowered It can't get loud enough Nothing covers the burning inside Each though is a shard knife digging through my mind Paranoid schizophrenic Borderline Bipolar Depressed OCD Anxiety I am not a human I am a list of problems And therefore I must leave

24