#anaesthesia
When the dose of propofol hits
Your veins,
The world fall apart into
One big dark mess.
You try to hang on
To something,
Anything,
But nothing remains.
Everything just fades away,
Along with your conscience.
Feb 13, 2019
Feb 13, 2019 at 8:21 AM UTC
No fentanyl, midazolam or propofol.
Operation: childhood destruction using
non- sterile gloves.
Removal of parts of the brain and heart,
septic nightmares infect the mind.
The body shivers, loses control.
Gangrene of the soul.
Antiseptic, aromatic soap,
scraping the epidermal dirt.
Scratching so hard, unable
to get rid of the hurt.
Happiness decapitated,
enters the cemetery gates
pointing with her morphine-coated fingers
to her tomb.
Chronic torture and no remorse.
A pre-meditated ****** of dreams and hopes.
Jul 1, 2018
Jul 1, 2018 at 2:54 AM UTC
I know a girl who won't give up.
The strongest woman in the world.
She will smile
Without biting her tongue.
She will laugh
Without sadness on her lips.
She will soar
She will fly
In time---
Every single night.
She pains.
She pains.
She dies,
time
til
time
in every single
drawing breath.
Needlessly.
She cracks.
She wounds.
She breaks.
She scars.
Scarily.
Killing herself
Just to fall asleep...
Before she prays.
Makeup---
She pains.
She pains.
Yet she stands.
She tires.
She tries.
Makeup---
She smiles.
Fractured.
Yet still smiles.
Tearless.
Wearless.
Tireless.
But not painless.
Makeup---
She talks.
She pains.
She smiles.
Makeup---
She walks.
She pains.
She runs.
Makeup---
She's strong,
yet her strength
it needs refilling.
For she stands,
it aches,
yet still she has,
anaesthesia.
Makeup---
She succeeds.
Yet it pains,
walking away.
Makeu---
She goes home
Alone.
It hurts.
It hurts.
Yet she drives.
Make---
Cooks food.
Instant made.
It burns.
It burns.
Yet she eats.
Mak---
Brushes her teeth
Looks at a mirror
Seeing herself,
Smudges.
Blurs.
And yet she still
has the power
to close her eyes.
Ma---
And she lies on her bed.
With all the pain in the world.
She doesn't even
have to wash off
the makeup on her face,
she just cries it off...
M---
Before she prays.
Just to fall asleep...
Killing herself
Scarily.
She scars.
She breaks.
She wounds.
She cracks.
Needlessly.
Drawing breath
in every single
time
til
time
She dies
She pains.
She pains.
Every single night.
In time
She will fly.
She will soar.
Without sadness on her lips.
She will laugh
Without biting her tongue.
She will smile,
The strongest woman in the world.
I know a girl who won't give up.
Apr 24, 2018
Apr 24, 2018 at 5:01 AM UTC
Hours lost...
But I feel like I've gained
I felt nothing...
No recollection of the world.
No worries.
No thoughts.
No questions.
No demons.
Felt like I was dead but...
I got a morbid sense of peace,
and reassurance.
I felt bliss.
Unshackled, untethered and unbound
in those hours,
I felt one with the disconnection
from my life.
Strange and worrisome...
But I long to be caught in those
lost hours again.
Sep 21, 2017
Sep 21, 2017 at 1:03 AM UTC