#agh
tonight is the first time in 45 days that I have considered calling to ask to shoot me dead (EVEN WHEN HE CALLED ME TO SAY HE COULD GET ME HIGH AGAIN)
I WANT TO DIE BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T LOVE ME LIKE SHE USED TO
but even more because I don't love her at all anymore
I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD EVER HAVE TO FEEL LIKE THIS AGAIN
you said you could only love me sober
BUT WHAT DOES ANOTHER KEY TAG MEAN TO SOMEONE SO ******* DEAD INSIDE
YOU CRIED THE LAST TIME WE KISSED
and I didn't want to use behind it
BUT I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW STUPID I FEEL BECAUSE I STILL DREAM OF THE WAY YOU USE TO PRESS SMACK INTO MY WRISTS
AND HOW ******* **** YOU LOOKED WITH MY BLOOD STILL ON YOUR LIPS
and maybe this has more to do with the fact that you only ever made me feel lonely
AND I AM PERFECTLY CAPABLE OF DOING THAT ALL ALONE
so this is about the next time I don't answer the phone
and you can thank the rig on the top of my book case
Jul 14, 2019
Jul 14, 2019 at 1:01 AM UTC
there's a hickey on my chest
and I know you are the one who left it there
because it is signed in the letters of your name
and if you come over...
I'll show you how it matches the black scratch ink between my shoulder blades
Jun 22, 2019
Jun 22, 2019 at 10:47 PM UTC
i have no idea why you still make my heart pound out of my chest
just by saying "hey"
Dec 13, 2016
Dec 13, 2016 at 7:31 PM UTC
never mind,
i imagine him saying,
you know i lied.
you were never that beautiful.
he called me stunning and i wanted to say i loved him.
i wanted to say there was no mortal above him.
goddess, he said.
--
i'm seventeen and unfulfilled,
running from myself,
but however fast i am i still can't
get away from this place, from me.
self-destructing souvenirs in my head
why won't they burn away already
there's something empty about this bed
and my heart is growing heavy
--
i don't want to treasure you.
diamonds are always cutting me to shreds,
but they're never on my hands
pretty boys, they never take me to bed.
they just say hello to say goodbye.
Dec 12, 2016
Dec 12, 2016 at 12:44 PM UTC
* On black leather wings *
* The flying fox comes *
* A shadow given life *
* With the death of the sun *
Sep 27, 2016
Sep 27, 2016 at 6:25 PM UTC
blank.
do you ever just feel so overwhelmed with
**[life
work
school
friends
people
followers
likes
home
family
sadness
confusion
and just blegh,]**
that your mind goes blank?
Feb 22, 2016
Feb 22, 2016 at 8:11 PM UTC
Um, hey? Hi? Hello? Hola?
As you can see, i'm not really good at this conversation thing,
i mean, it's always been hard for me,
i could sing before i could talk,
hell i could even walk before i could talk,
i'm sorry if i avoid you a lot
and ignore you without thought,
it's just that i don't want to embarrass myself, in front of you
you're like a bookshelf, filled with different stories that i want to discover, but as soon as i see you,
i quickly hide and take cover.
Ah, love don't get me wrong,
trust me i want to explore the universes in your mind, and the galaxies in your eyes, and the lies in your smile, that can maybe stretch a mile,
i want to trace the canvas, your skin, with my fingers, the brush, and tell you to hush so i can hear your heart beat,
i want to watch the art in your heart, flow through your veins, it keeps me sane,
i want to be able to know every part of you, i wish you'd want to do the same to me too.
You probably do, but i'm just to nervous to introduce myself to such a beauty like you.
Feb 21, 2016
Feb 21, 2016 at 10:41 PM UTC
I'm addicted to you
Just like how I'm addicted to the sadness that courses through my veins
And the cigarettes that burn my lips
And the needles that leave bruises on my skin
But of all these addictions
You'd have to be the worst to ever touch my skin
Nov 3, 2015
Nov 3, 2015 at 10:40 AM UTC
YOU ARE:
melodrama.
sunsets on mountains and poetic weekends.
“if you write about me, i will blush when you read it.”
playing my guitar.
playing with my hair.
playing with me.
“do you want to get something to eat?”
“are you tired?”
“let me in."
holding me down, in the best possible way.
approved by my mom.
poetic texts and the reason i’ve been clutching my phone.
too good to me.
YOU ARE NOT:
what you appear to be, you are so much more.
what i expected.
disappointing.
sure about where this is going, neither am i.
a manic decision, although you may seem like it now.
alone.
mine.
mine.
mine.
Sep 24, 2015
Sep 24, 2015 at 1:45 PM UTC
feel my frightened skin
my voluptuous insecurities
feel my silence breaking
wave by wave
slowly turning into this
Sep 1, 2014
Sep 1, 2014 at 2:17 AM UTC
everything seems the same
then repeat
I can't express my feelings right
then repeat
I can't even make them look like a poem
then repeat
that's the thing about repetition
then repeat
it seems like it sounds nice
then repeat
but it sounds so ****** and agh
Aug 25, 2014
Aug 25, 2014 at 12:03 AM UTC
close your eyes
tell me what is it
don't let those crazy eyes
don't let them cry
keep looking at me
I won't step aside
don't give up on me
I wrote you a song
about all the little things you like
I wanted to take it slow
but the rush between the both of us
couldn't make it any slow
I just wish I could have known you better than this
Aug 23, 2014
Aug 23, 2014 at 10:20 PM UTC
Bugs in the dark swarm
My screen is not the sunlight
But they know nothing.
Jul 29, 2014
Jul 29, 2014 at 4:14 AM UTC
I'm falling apart
I need to be back
I'm not being myself
Jul 26, 2014
Jul 26, 2014 at 12:11 AM UTC
I want to **** myself
I want to know how it feels to be truly empty
I want to end with this with my hand
when I was a little child
I used to dream of days of happiness
days of being all colorful
now my days are just blue
"suicide is not the answer"
"this will be endless"
honestly
I don't care
Jul 25, 2014
Jul 25, 2014 at 11:39 PM UTC
There's no such thing as
"good" and "bad"
there
are
just
things
Jun 14, 2014
Jun 14, 2014 at 1:03 AM UTC
blank pages are nothing
blank pages could be everything
blank pages are being destroyed
user for horrible thoughts
used for distance
asking to be burned
asking to be destroyed
by the hand of the stupid
living for ages
used by the greatest minds
the most creative humans
blank pages are used for art
blank pages are meant to show you
that something empty
can be completely powerful
Jun 12, 2014
Jun 12, 2014 at 3:19 PM UTC
Please, please hear me
'Cause I'm crying out
If I thought you weren't here
Would I still shout?
I've got some questions
That I know you've heard
Perhaps you'd let them
Have a second word.
Hear me out, I say,
The lines are broken down
Maybe when I took a breath
It brought them to the ground.
Maybe in the end I'll say
That this was all for good
But at this moment, I cannot stay
Anywhere you stood.
So hear me...I know it hurts...
Please, don't shut me out.
If I knew that you would turn away
Then would I still shout?
Jun 3, 2014
Jun 3, 2014 at 10:40 PM UTC
Whenever I'm mad
Or angry, or frustrated
I picture a knife.
I don't know why, no really,
But it's like I want to stab.
May 16, 2014
May 16, 2014 at 12:59 AM UTC
Who am I after the ceremony
After the pomp and the glory?
Who am I after I really admit
That I hate spotlight but do enjoy it?
May 16, 2014
May 16, 2014 at 12:56 AM UTC
**** what a body, and sometimes
she touches me.
**** what a great voice, and sometimes
she sings to me.
**** what a smile, and sometimes
it's directed at me.
Our laughs match like
we were meant to be.
r.c.
May 13, 2014
May 13, 2014 at 2:53 PM UTC
Excuse me sir, but
My life's been turned upside down
I've moved twice this year
You just stab me in the heart
And expect me to function?
May 11, 2014
May 11, 2014 at 1:22 AM UTC
You don't ship it like I do
In my spare time (all the time)
Instead of paying attention.
You're not as much of a fan as I am
You say I'm obsessed
I call it infatuation.
You can't fill the hole in yourself
Without a ship but you'd rather not
So you can shy away from shipping
I'm on a ******* yacht.
You don't understand the calling
Which is, basically, at this point, normality
And thus, I have no need for you
Go be a carbon copy.
But I will sail!
I will go down with this ship!
**** tumblr to hell
For spoiling my ****
But sail, I will, even still.
Oh, in my battleship
I'll rip your OTP!
My ship is stronger
My ship is closer to canon in reality!
So yes, your pairing, I will shred, I'll rip.
Apr 28, 2014
Apr 28, 2014 at 1:17 AM UTC