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Wanted (read the three day old paper): yourself, position effective immediately, pay negotiable Being in the job market for longer than I’d care to admit, I applied. I could be a yourself. I hoped I wouldn’t have to sit in a cubicle. (I knew I could though, if it came right down to it). I wore Roots sweatpants to the job interview, It’s quirky, I thought, I am just doing me. I envisioned my power animal: that vastly underrated emoji (You know the one; he’s coy as **** I was also coy as **** Or as coy as I could ******* feel in pants whose proud purpose was to make their wearer perspire. I bet NO ONE had thought of this. Turns out everyone had thought of it. **** Needless to say, I didn’t get the position; the yourself life wasn’t for me. So I applied elsewhere. Somewhere far away from that whole embarrassing sweatpant fiasco.
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Aug 3, 2014
Aug 3, 2014 at 2:41 PM UTC
The Job Interview
Wanted (read the three day old paper): yourself, position effective immediately, pay negotiable Being in the job market for longer than I’d care to admit, I applied. I could be a yourself. I hoped I wouldn’t have to sit in a cubicle. (I knew I could though, if it came right down to it). I wore Roots sweatpants to the job interview, It’s quirky, I thought, I am just doing me. I envisioned my power animal: that vastly underrated emoji (You know the one; he’s coy as **** I was also coy as **** Or as coy as I could ******* feel in pants whose proud purpose was to make their wearer perspire. I bet NO ONE had thought of this. Turns out everyone had thought of it. **** Needless to say, I didn’t get the position; the yourself life wasn’t for me. So I applied elsewhere. Somewhere far away from that whole embarrassing sweatpant fiasco.
emily-9
Written by
Canadian
Aug 3, 2014
Aug 3, 2014 at 2:41 PM UTC
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