I never had the confidence
When I was small
To tell on my cousin
Because I woke up to him trying to touch me while I sleep
Or peeking through the cracks of the door when I dressed.
I never had the confidence
As we grew older
To unlock my door during the day
Because I knew he would just push me around
Because “boys will be boys”
And these bruises on my body
Showed that he would always get his way.
I once had the confidence
When I was fourteen
To tell the principle that one boy held me against a wall
While the other put his hands down the front of my shirt
But the principle called me a liar
That the boy just slipped and fell down the hall
And his hands accidently landed in my shirt.
I was told to be silent
I didn’t have the confidence
When I was sixteen
To tell my boyfriend no
Again and Again
So after the first few times saying it
He thought I was giving him my consent
So I “let” him **** me.
I didn’t have the confidence
For the next three years
Because he said I was helpless
I spoke too much
I was weak
I need a man to take care of me
No one else could ever love me
And I believed him
I didn’t have the confidence
Until someone told me
That it’s a beautiful thing to be a woman
That I’m important
That I have a voice.
I now have the confidence
To stop listening to excuses
To not have to say “no” more than once
To be free because I know how it feels to say goodbye
Because I am important
Because I have a voice.
Apr 23, 2014
Apr 23, 2014 at 7:17 PM UTC
I never had the confidence
When I was small
To tell on my cousin
Because I woke up to him trying to touch me while I sleep
Or peeking through the cracks of the door when I dressed.
I never had the confidence
As we grew older
To unlock my door during the day
Because I knew he would just push me around
Because “boys will be boys”
And these bruises on my body
Showed that he would always get his way.
I once had the confidence
When I was fourteen
To tell the principle that one boy held me against a wall
While the other put his hands down the front of my shirt
But the principle called me a liar
That the boy just slipped and fell down the hall
And his hands accidently landed in my shirt.
I was told to be silent
I didn’t have the confidence
When I was sixteen
To tell my boyfriend no
Again and Again
So after the first few times saying it
He thought I was giving him my consent
So I “let” him **** me.
I didn’t have the confidence
For the next three years
Because he said I was helpless
I spoke too much
I was weak
I need a man to take care of me
No one else could ever love me
And I believed him
I didn’t have the confidence
Until someone told me
That it’s a beautiful thing to be a woman
That I’m important
That I have a voice.
I now have the confidence
To stop listening to excuses
To not have to say “no” more than once
To be free because I know how it feels to say goodbye
Because I am important
Because I have a voice.