My pants had a hole in the pocket where I carry my keys
and
after a week of picking them up after they had slid down my leg to my right shoe
and another week of carrying them in my left pocket with my phone and glasses transferred to my right
they are too big to fit through the hole
I decided to sew the hole closed
To do this I bought a "sewing kit" at the supermarket
It contained thread, needles, a tape measure printed on tracing paper
that little wire loopy thing that helps you thread the needle
and a pair of ridiculous scissors.
The label "scissors" carries with it certain expectations
Cutting of course
and finger holes that actually fit your fingers
It's like when you order a hot dog
you expect a tube of meat in a longish bun
not a wilted salad between two stale rice cakes
The issue was that these "scissors"
met neither of those expectations
that one has when picking up scissors
They seemed to be stamped out of a new alloy
of aluminum foil
and mylar balloon
The "blades" didn't actually meet
and the holes for fingers
would present an obstacle for any escaping green pea
I did use them and finally
after some sawing
cut the thread
I was going to complain
but thought of who had probably made them
this pair of ridiculous scissors
and pictured
the child or man or woman
in a sweaty factory somewhere
probably hungry
They might work long hours
for meager wages
and
I sit in a comfortable life
and complain about ridiculous scissors
Apr 15, 2014
Apr 15, 2014 at 10:18 AM UTC
My pants had a hole in the pocket where I carry my keys
and
after a week of picking them up after they had slid down my leg to my right shoe
and another week of carrying them in my left pocket with my phone and glasses transferred to my right
they are too big to fit through the hole
I decided to sew the hole closed
To do this I bought a "sewing kit" at the supermarket
It contained thread, needles, a tape measure printed on tracing paper
that little wire loopy thing that helps you thread the needle
and a pair of ridiculous scissors.
The label "scissors" carries with it certain expectations
Cutting of course
and finger holes that actually fit your fingers
It's like when you order a hot dog
you expect a tube of meat in a longish bun
not a wilted salad between two stale rice cakes
The issue was that these "scissors"
met neither of those expectations
that one has when picking up scissors
They seemed to be stamped out of a new alloy
of aluminum foil
and mylar balloon
The "blades" didn't actually meet
and the holes for fingers
would present an obstacle for any escaping green pea
I did use them and finally
after some sawing
cut the thread
I was going to complain
but thought of who had probably made them
this pair of ridiculous scissors
and pictured
the child or man or woman
in a sweaty factory somewhere
probably hungry
They might work long hours
for meager wages
and
I sit in a comfortable life
and complain about ridiculous scissors
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