I... lied
for the first time in my life
a true lie
I regret it
and want to cleanse myself of the guilt
and this horrendous evil
This time
my lie was not a deceiving answer
I saw the pity in her eyes
and I knew that she already had her information
she was trying to confirm it
and i lied.
I. lied.
I didn't even look at her eyes
Like i usually do
I just
looked down and around
She knows
She knows
She knows
I cannot hid it
the guilt will ****** me
but the lie
oh, such a stupid one
but the way she asked me
"is everything alright?"
It made me jump
I knew it would happen
I knew she would ask me
just
not come close and whisper with sympathy
I have never lied before
and this is the last time
i will lie
the guilt is unbearable
and
I cannot keep it from her
but also
I don't want to do anything stupid
but the only way to clean this guilty
feeling off
is to tell her
I will not lie
because the sympathy and kindness
reflected in her eyes so brightly
a quasar would be dimmer
oh, this guilt
it truly is the ultimatum
The way she perked when she saw me
close enough to come bounding to me
then to say a whisper and leave
that just killed me
i wanted to break down and cry my heart out
but i couldn't
not in that place
no..
Feb 4, 2014
Feb 4, 2014 at 8:28 PM UTC
I... lied
for the first time in my life
a true lie
I regret it
and want to cleanse myself of the guilt
and this horrendous evil
This time
my lie was not a deceiving answer
I saw the pity in her eyes
and I knew that she already had her information
she was trying to confirm it
and i lied.
I. lied.
I didn't even look at her eyes
Like i usually do
I just
looked down and around
She knows
She knows
She knows
I cannot hid it
the guilt will ****** me
but the lie
oh, such a stupid one
but the way she asked me
"is everything alright?"
It made me jump
I knew it would happen
I knew she would ask me
just
not come close and whisper with sympathy
I have never lied before
and this is the last time
i will lie
the guilt is unbearable
and
I cannot keep it from her
but also
I don't want to do anything stupid
but the only way to clean this guilty
feeling off
is to tell her
I will not lie
because the sympathy and kindness
reflected in her eyes so brightly
a quasar would be dimmer
oh, this guilt
it truly is the ultimatum
The way she perked when she saw me
close enough to come bounding to me
then to say a whisper and leave
that just killed me
i wanted to break down and cry my heart out
but i couldn't
not in that place
no..
February 4th 2014, 14 years old. I told my first lie. First true lie. I have never been this guilty of lying, but this time. When I saw her face and read her expressions and her eyes, I saw that she knew already about me... but yet came to talk to me, and I refused it. I am no deservant of her sympathy anymore, she shouldn't be suffering and worrying over a shadow. But the point is she will.. until i can either a) lie more and cover up or b) say the truth...
