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seasonalskinsPoems
part i. my room clean, precise ready a navy dress dainty, floral like a little girl loved landing lights off scuffle of feet rushing silence in this serenity i am chaos soft music soothing a specialised playlist could this be an anymore cliché way to die? i listen to time awaiting a moment sent by a rhythm 02:00 hold on 32 pills 34 or was it 68? it doesn’t matter 02:30 what future? there is no war it’s all in my head stop what no need thoughts out dizzy ‘help’ part ii. what were you thinking are you crazy stupid stupid girl how many why I don’t know not anymore but it will be fine I will go to sleep no fuss agitation irritable useless annoyance what had I expect strangers in the room my room but the only stranger was me I had known nothing less voices? did they tell you to do this? I laughed in my mind how cliché do they think I am no it’s just me part iii. numbness and weariness overwhelmed me bitter bile rose a long day ahead name? address? birth date? what made you do this? over and over again ringing in my ears as I answered in the numbness I had become a barcode being scanned not being looked at once more I fought the urge to lie well not completely ward 14 darkness panic blankness part iv. drip drip drip awoken to a beat my heart or the machine I wish I knew awoken to regret a coward a shadow always light shining outside I have become an outsider ironically part v. her scars. trailing down her arms I wonder how long would it take for her scar in her mind to heal I make suicide look normal her screams. rattled the bones in my body she was an unravelled mayhem in pandemonium her shouts. were more like pleading between herself and whom appeared a fragment of a nightmare her crying. lasted for hours all through the night when she stopped it was only the crying that stopped I was the intruder there was a silence in ward 14 I wanted anything but a silence to think think think looking at her sleeping form I wonder what she wanted to forget but no silence is louder than words I was told I could go home I should have wanted to but there was a safeness a safeness like me security from outside as I walked away the weight of eyes made me sink into a guilt that I dare not look back at ward 14
0
Feb 2, 2014
Feb 2, 2014 at 8:16 AM UTC
ward 14
part i. my room clean, precise ready a navy dress dainty, floral like a little girl loved landing lights off scuffle of feet rushing silence in this serenity i am chaos soft music soothing a specialised playlist could this be an anymore cliché way to die? i listen to time awaiting a moment sent by a rhythm 02:00 hold on 32 pills 34 or was it 68? it doesn’t matter 02:30 what future? there is no war it’s all in my head stop what no need thoughts out dizzy ‘help’ part ii. what were you thinking are you crazy stupid stupid girl how many why I don’t know not anymore but it will be fine I will go to sleep no fuss agitation irritable useless annoyance what had I expect strangers in the room my room but the only stranger was me I had known nothing less voices? did they tell you to do this? I laughed in my mind how cliché do they think I am no it’s just me part iii. numbness and weariness overwhelmed me bitter bile rose a long day ahead name? address? birth date? what made you do this? over and over again ringing in my ears as I answered in the numbness I had become a barcode being scanned not being looked at once more I fought the urge to lie well not completely ward 14 darkness panic blankness part iv. drip drip drip awoken to a beat my heart or the machine I wish I knew awoken to regret a coward a shadow always light shining outside I have become an outsider ironically part v. her scars. trailing down her arms I wonder how long would it take for her scar in her mind to heal I make suicide look normal her screams. rattled the bones in my body she was an unravelled mayhem in pandemonium her shouts. were more like pleading between herself and whom appeared a fragment of a nightmare her crying. lasted for hours all through the night when she stopped it was only the crying that stopped I was the intruder there was a silence in ward 14 I wanted anything but a silence to think think think looking at her sleeping form I wonder what she wanted to forget but no silence is louder than words I was told I could go home I should have wanted to but there was a safeness a safeness like me security from outside as I walked away the weight of eyes made me sink into a guilt that I dare not look back at ward 14
seasonalskins
Written by
seasonalskins
Indonesian
Feb 2, 2014
Feb 2, 2014 at 8:16 AM UTC
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