I tremble and wonder
How life took a turn away from bliss.
I think of my childhood worries,
Of my parents yelling at each other
Only to end in divorce when I was only
Nine years old.
Of my youth being taken in confusion
About what is right or wrong.
I think of how I treated my poor
Mother as I chose a side in the battle
Of custody between the three of us.
How I flawed as a person during
My first real chance to be truly happy.
I think of being thrown out into the night
Blindsided and full of anger,
Trying hard to not cause myself harm.
And of walking out a year and a half later
Giving up on being dissatisfied
With how I was living.
I think of hopping from one home
To another, unable to find a job.
Of needing quick relief,
And enlisting in the armed forces.
Wondering how I now await
The life of a special operations soldier.
What happened to that child
Who was not yet nine years old?
Who was he? Was he happy?
How did he picture his future?
Dec 25, 2013
Dec 25, 2013 at 2:05 AM UTC
I tremble and wonder
How life took a turn away from bliss.
I think of my childhood worries,
Of my parents yelling at each other
Only to end in divorce when I was only
Nine years old.
Of my youth being taken in confusion
About what is right or wrong.
I think of how I treated my poor
Mother as I chose a side in the battle
Of custody between the three of us.
How I flawed as a person during
My first real chance to be truly happy.
I think of being thrown out into the night
Blindsided and full of anger,
Trying hard to not cause myself harm.
And of walking out a year and a half later
Giving up on being dissatisfied
With how I was living.
I think of hopping from one home
To another, unable to find a job.
Of needing quick relief,
And enlisting in the armed forces.
Wondering how I now await
The life of a special operations soldier.
What happened to that child
Who was not yet nine years old?
Who was he? Was he happy?
How did he picture his future?
Yes, this is my life
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