It began the day the God arrived,
Golden-mouthed, laurel-bright,
Pressing a future into my palms
And calling it a ‘gift’.
They said I was chosen.
They said few are.
A city with marble gates
Opened its doors and called me worthy.
I believed them.
Oh, my dear Circe.
Why wouldn’t I?
Even Cassandra,
Once mistook prophecy–
For little mercy.
Yet even as the wreath was placed,
Something tightened in my chest—
As if Apollo was already asking for more
Than I knew how to give.
God, he did linger.
The light at the tip of my fingers.
Apollo spoke softly to me,
His own way of excellency.
A devoted hunger,
The sleepless nights I hoped not to blunder.
‘Be excellent,
Be tireless–
There’s not a single stress–
…
Know this to yourself.’
I simply nod,
God's words stuck.
I obeyed,
Stayed in the shade.
Not because I wanted to,
But God’s–
They don’t wait in lieu.
I did so.
I stayed,
I aimed to know
What felt like a crusade.
But I would not soften for it,
For it took every ounce
To remain standing ‘neath the sun.
And still,
It wasn't enough.
Drained of my will,
Consumed by bluffs.
The gift soured.
The light began to fade,
These lines–oh I can’t refrain.
Of course, not all at once–
Even Gods are patient…
And it takes time to slowly rot.
Not long enough for this to remain ancient.
They began to say I was difficult.
Uncooperative.
Too sharp for grace.
That I spoke too much of collapse
And not enough gratitude.
The light thinned,
The wreath grew heavy,
The desire skinned me.
Even Cassandra,
I am reminded,
Was adored before she was dismissed—
Before her truth became inconvenient.
I still saw clearly.
That was the punishment.
Each warning I offered
Returned to me as an accusation.
Each doubt I named–
It was proof I did not deserve the light.
So I learned restraint.
I learned silence.
I learned to swallow prophecy
Until it tasted like guilt.
And somewhere between obedience and erasure,
I stopped asking
Whether the God had asked too much—
And began asking
What was wrong with me
For not surviving it so beautifully.
Apr 21
Apr 21, 2026 at 10:40 AM UTC
It began the day the God arrived,
Golden-mouthed, laurel-bright,
Pressing a future into my palms
And calling it a ‘gift’.
They said I was chosen.
They said few are.
A city with marble gates
Opened its doors and called me worthy.
I believed them.
Oh, my dear Circe.
Why wouldn’t I?
Even Cassandra,
Once mistook prophecy–
For little mercy.
Yet even as the wreath was placed,
Something tightened in my chest—
As if Apollo was already asking for more
Than I knew how to give.
God, he did linger.
The light at the tip of my fingers.
Apollo spoke softly to me,
His own way of excellency.
A devoted hunger,
The sleepless nights I hoped not to blunder.
‘Be excellent,
Be tireless–
There’s not a single stress–
…
Know this to yourself.’
I simply nod,
God's words stuck.
I obeyed,
Stayed in the shade.
Not because I wanted to,
But God’s–
They don’t wait in lieu.
I did so.
I stayed,
I aimed to know
What felt like a crusade.
But I would not soften for it,
For it took every ounce
To remain standing ‘neath the sun.
And still,
It wasn't enough.
Drained of my will,
Consumed by bluffs.
The gift soured.
The light began to fade,
These lines–oh I can’t refrain.
Of course, not all at once–
Even Gods are patient…
And it takes time to slowly rot.
Not long enough for this to remain ancient.
They began to say I was difficult.
Uncooperative.
Too sharp for grace.
That I spoke too much of collapse
And not enough gratitude.
The light thinned,
The wreath grew heavy,
The desire skinned me.
Even Cassandra,
I am reminded,
Was adored before she was dismissed—
Before her truth became inconvenient.
I still saw clearly.
That was the punishment.
Each warning I offered
Returned to me as an accusation.
Each doubt I named–
It was proof I did not deserve the light.
So I learned restraint.
I learned silence.
I learned to swallow prophecy
Until it tasted like guilt.
And somewhere between obedience and erasure,
I stopped asking
Whether the God had asked too much—
And began asking
What was wrong with me
For not surviving it so beautifully.
[February 21, 2026]
I actually dedicated to someone from my class--a once close friend lol
