I guess I always dreamed up a new masculinity,
One that looked like the male sculptures and art—
Soft, regal, strong, but alive.
Creative, like the poet who beams with softness, grace, and strength.
I think that’s how it truly was, for the most part.
After being abused so much by the masculine energies
that exist in our patriarchal world,
I think that men should be taught there is another way to exist without shame.
That they can be alive and beautiful;
That their masculinity can be revered and unshamed in this world.
Just like how I learned to be a healthy woman amidst immense amounts of pain—
How to be a leader, how to be sovereign.
How to be unpulsing, but still allow the softness inside of me when it is safe.
I feel that I can finally tell myself it’s safe to come alive again,
To dance to the heartbeat of my heart,
To the sounds in the air of the dark night with the pounding rain
of love and relaxation.
Of the sorrow of my pain: I refuse to allow it to control me
or my life force anymore.
I fight every day for a space within my own life.
I carry my heart, with its holes, upon my shell,
Wanting someone to peek through and say, "Hey, I see you.
You don’t need to be so strong and tough anymore.
You don’t need your piercings to feel safe;
You don’t need your leather to be your armor anymore.
Come, lay down your armor, lay beside me, and you will be safe together."
I sang. I sang through all of my pain.
I visualized, I played the affirmations
Through the homelessness, through the rapes,
And now, I just want to sit with my bare legs on the sand,
On the shore, and breathe in sunshine and life.
Apr 5
Apr 5, 2026 at 5:05 PM UTC
I guess I always dreamed up a new masculinity,
One that looked like the male sculptures and art—
Soft, regal, strong, but alive.
Creative, like the poet who beams with softness, grace, and strength.
I think that’s how it truly was, for the most part.
After being abused so much by the masculine energies
that exist in our patriarchal world,
I think that men should be taught there is another way to exist without shame.
That they can be alive and beautiful;
That their masculinity can be revered and unshamed in this world.
Just like how I learned to be a healthy woman amidst immense amounts of pain—
How to be a leader, how to be sovereign.
How to be unpulsing, but still allow the softness inside of me when it is safe.
I feel that I can finally tell myself it’s safe to come alive again,
To dance to the heartbeat of my heart,
To the sounds in the air of the dark night with the pounding rain
of love and relaxation.
Of the sorrow of my pain: I refuse to allow it to control me
or my life force anymore.
I fight every day for a space within my own life.
I carry my heart, with its holes, upon my shell,
Wanting someone to peek through and say, "Hey, I see you.
You don’t need to be so strong and tough anymore.
You don’t need your piercings to feel safe;
You don’t need your leather to be your armor anymore.
Come, lay down your armor, lay beside me, and you will be safe together."
I sang. I sang through all of my pain.
I visualized, I played the affirmations
Through the homelessness, through the rapes,
And now, I just want to sit with my bare legs on the sand,
On the shore, and breathe in sunshine and life.
https://open.spotify.com/track/4k7x3QKrc3h3U0Viqk0uop?si=4bb50709e199490c