i’ve been here
for days,
a constant
state of panic
that keeps me
awake
and my nerves
frayed.
unable to fall
asleep,
my body can
no longer take
it—
until
i crash under
the weight,
running for
cover, scared of
slumber
where my thoughts
plague me,
and force me
to surrender—
a bleak surrender,
where the future’s
bleaker
and i’m too weak
to see
the other side.
they say
with thunder comes
the rain,
but the rain
can’t wash
these thoughts away.
i’m on autopilot,
baby, and i can’t
feel a thing.
i’ve been here
for days,
a constant state
of panic
that keeps me awake,
that i keep
trying to pinpoint,
ascertain—
why i’m in
a constant
state of flight
or fight
when i just want
one simple,
peaceful night.
Nov 5, 2025
Nov 5, 2025 at 11:00 PM UTC
i’ve been here
for days,
a constant
state of panic
that keeps me
awake
and my nerves
frayed.
unable to fall
asleep,
my body can
no longer take
it—
until
i crash under
the weight,
running for
cover, scared of
slumber
where my thoughts
plague me,
and force me
to surrender—
a bleak surrender,
where the future’s
bleaker
and i’m too weak
to see
the other side.
they say
with thunder comes
the rain,
but the rain
can’t wash
these thoughts away.
i’m on autopilot,
baby, and i can’t
feel a thing.
i’ve been here
for days,
a constant state
of panic
that keeps me awake,
that i keep
trying to pinpoint,
ascertain—
why i’m in
a constant
state of flight
or fight
when i just want
one simple,
peaceful night.
inspired by afi’s “a deep slow panic” — about the kind of nights that don’t heal, only haunt.
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