I was seven,
The last time i thought about suicide,
I was severely bullied,
my dad left,
my mum worked
and i had no friends apart from a singular cat
that also died
My family grieved when i was born
And all i wanted was love
People mistook it for attention seeking
But i was attention needing
I planned ways to die,
Self harmed,
And from ages 6 and 7 cried continuously
Im now 15 and in year 11
And i feel like that same kid
I have a girlfriend now
Im queer
And neurodivergent
Yet somehow i still feel like that sad child wanting it to be over
Im 25 days till 8 years clean
And yet i still want to relapse
Have some scars so im valid
Cry because i can and because i have no better response
I want to die-
Oct 1, 2025
Oct 1, 2025 at 5:35 AM UTC
I was seven,
The last time i thought about suicide,
I was severely bullied,
my dad left,
my mum worked
and i had no friends apart from a singular cat
that also died
My family grieved when i was born
And all i wanted was love
People mistook it for attention seeking
But i was attention needing
I planned ways to die,
Self harmed,
And from ages 6 and 7 cried continuously
Im now 15 and in year 11
And i feel like that same kid
I have a girlfriend now
Im queer
And neurodivergent
Yet somehow i still feel like that sad child wanting it to be over
Im 25 days till 8 years clean
And yet i still want to relapse
Have some scars so im valid
Cry because i can and because i have no better response
I want to die-
i think i need help but
camhs is so slow i might as well just grab the razor
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