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I made a promise to God that I would not react this way. I promised Him that I would be strong and maintain a straight face.. Did He know that I was lying? Could He tell that underneath my sincere apology that I would rather give up than to keep trying? Because- I wasn't sincere. I still had the emptiness clawing at my head- screaming at me, pleading to my heart that I wanted to be dead. But, that is not what I said. I promised God that, in the end, I would remember what He taught me. I would put Him first because He would never leave... I knew that I was lying. Did He? I would rather give up than to force myself to keep trying.
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Jul 9, 2022
Jul 9, 2022 at 4:04 PM UTC
Empty Promises
I made a promise to God that I would not react this way. I promised Him that I would be strong and maintain a straight face.. Did He know that I was lying? Could He tell that underneath my sincere apology that I would rather give up than to keep trying? Because- I wasn't sincere. I still had the emptiness clawing at my head- screaming at me, pleading to my heart that I wanted to be dead. But, that is not what I said. I promised God that, in the end, I would remember what He taught me. I would put Him first because He would never leave... I knew that I was lying. Did He? I would rather give up than to force myself to keep trying.
#depression#sadness#hope#god#death#suicide#loneliness#crying
Rumorr
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Rumorr
24/F
Jul 9, 2022
Jul 9, 2022 at 4:04 PM UTC
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