A riveting fracture
Of my current existence.
Clenching my throat,
Trying to squeeze out the dread;
The panic.
I've lost myself -
I don't know where I am, or
Where my body is.
Tense. Because
I'm trying so hard
Not to let go of myself,
Again.
"Keep straight.
Keep focused.
No.
Not like that.
Don't think ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐
About ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต.
Don't be that way
About ๐ฉ๐๐๐จ.
It's okay.
Try to breathe.
You have control
Over your mind.
๐ฌ๐ผ๐ ๐ต๐ฎ๐๐ฒ ๐ฐ๐ผ๐ป๐๐ฟ๐ผ๐น
Over your mind.
๐ฌ๐ผ๐ ๐ต๐ฎ๐๐ฒ ๐ฐ๐ผ๐ป๐๐ฟ๐ผ๐น
๐ข๐๐ฒ๐ฟ ๐๐ผ๐๐ฟ ๐บ๐ถ๐ป๐ฑ."
And it's okay
For a moment,
But the busy hands
Don't shield the silence
For long.
And through that
It comes spinning,
Entwining amongst
My conscious hardwiring.
"You are not welcome!
I don't want to believe it."
But I've been deeply imprinted
To believe
These emotional rules
Are bound to me.
So, often I break;
I give in.
The sheer loneliness
Of the thought
Consumes me.
I wait in the rain,
For when the storm dissipates,
๐๐ข๐บ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ญ ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ต๐ถ๐ณ๐ฏ.
โช๏ธmica lightโช๏ธ
Jan 26, 2022
Jan 26, 2022 at 5:36 PM UTC
A riveting fracture
Of my current existence.
Clenching my throat,
Trying to squeeze out the dread;
The panic.
I've lost myself -
I don't know where I am, or
Where my body is.
Tense. Because
I'm trying so hard
Not to let go of myself,
Again.
"Keep straight.
Keep focused.
No.
Not like that.
Don't think ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐
About ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต.
Don't be that way
About ๐ฉ๐๐๐จ.
It's okay.
Try to breathe.
You have control
Over your mind.
๐ฌ๐ผ๐ ๐ต๐ฎ๐๐ฒ ๐ฐ๐ผ๐ป๐๐ฟ๐ผ๐น
Over your mind.
๐ฌ๐ผ๐ ๐ต๐ฎ๐๐ฒ ๐ฐ๐ผ๐ป๐๐ฟ๐ผ๐น
๐ข๐๐ฒ๐ฟ ๐๐ผ๐๐ฟ ๐บ๐ถ๐ป๐ฑ."
And it's okay
For a moment,
But the busy hands
Don't shield the silence
For long.
And through that
It comes spinning,
Entwining amongst
My conscious hardwiring.
"You are not welcome!
I don't want to believe it."
But I've been deeply imprinted
To believe
These emotional rules
Are bound to me.
So, often I break;
I give in.
The sheer loneliness
Of the thought
Consumes me.
I wait in the rain,
For when the storm dissipates,
๐๐ข๐บ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ญ ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ต๐ถ๐ณ๐ฏ.
โช๏ธmica lightโช๏ธ
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