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i woke up. curiosity, excitement, and dread boiled together in my head. dusted angels dance in the sunlight. but here, it was a hope for night because this love, and this fright, it’s not quite right. my mind is supposed to be quiet. that voice, I’m not supposed to fight it. i was drowning in a sea storm, so what am I breathing for? i was slipping under the clouds, my emotions holding me down. the sun is so dark, and my night had no stars. my dreams were black tar and used cigars; just a dead end. i've spent what there is left to spend. there's too many splinters to mend. i’m so broken and bent, i can't breathe most of the time. my own identity wasn't mine. it was just faceless and unkind. all I wanted was to die. i was so lost. my glass heart covered in frost. of my life, what was the cost? a tiny jar with white pebble art. it wasn't too far, and most of all, it wasn't too hard. and then to sleep, i prayed the lord my soul to keep. and sleep was reckless, pointless, dreamless, and seamless, but deathless. and so in the day i woke up, nonetheless.
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Mar 11, 2020
Mar 11, 2020 at 2:53 AM UTC
a second chance
i woke up. curiosity, excitement, and dread boiled together in my head. dusted angels dance in the sunlight. but here, it was a hope for night because this love, and this fright, it’s not quite right. my mind is supposed to be quiet. that voice, I’m not supposed to fight it. i was drowning in a sea storm, so what am I breathing for? i was slipping under the clouds, my emotions holding me down. the sun is so dark, and my night had no stars. my dreams were black tar and used cigars; just a dead end. i've spent what there is left to spend. there's too many splinters to mend. i’m so broken and bent, i can't breathe most of the time. my own identity wasn't mine. it was just faceless and unkind. all I wanted was to die. i was so lost. my glass heart covered in frost. of my life, what was the cost? a tiny jar with white pebble art. it wasn't too far, and most of all, it wasn't too hard. and then to sleep, i prayed the lord my soul to keep. and sleep was reckless, pointless, dreamless, and seamless, but deathless. and so in the day i woke up, nonetheless.
i hope you always wake up
#suicide#mentalillness#depression
Cora
Written by
Cora
20/F/Iowa
Mar 11, 2020
Mar 11, 2020 at 2:53 AM UTC
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