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tarheeltoddPoems
I was just a boy. I hated myself. I had to be perfect. I hated myself. Everyone loved me. I hated myself. I was popular. I hated myself. I had lots of friends. I hated myself. My family loved me. I hated myself. I was condemned to hell by my Baptist upbringing. I hated myself. I dated girls. I hated myself. I attempted suicide. I survived. I hated myself. I came out. I struggled. I tried to love myself. I met my best friend, my soulmate. He taught me to love myself. He was murdered. I was destroyed. I gave up religion. I accepted myself. I tried to love myself. I mourned. I learn(ed). I battl(ed) depression. I suffer(ed) anxiety. I  accepted myself. I tried to love myself. I was fat. I hated myself. I was too gay. I hated myself. I was ugly. I hated myself. I was unlovable. I hated myself. A 17 year love crushed my soul. I tried, and failed, at loving myself. I got *** I hated myself. I was successful. I tried to love myself. I traveled the world. I was the consummate extrovert, the life of the party. I loved myself. I fell in love. He killed himself. I was destroyed. I hated myself. Am I unworthy of love? I hated myself. I pour myself into helping others. Do I love myself? I keep trying. I keep living. Somedays are good. Somedays not so much. Somedays I love myself. Somedays not so much.
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Jun 21, 2018
Jun 21, 2018 at 10:14 AM UTC
My Story
I was just a boy. I hated myself. I had to be perfect. I hated myself. Everyone loved me. I hated myself. I was popular. I hated myself. I had lots of friends. I hated myself. My family loved me. I hated myself. I was condemned to hell by my Baptist upbringing. I hated myself. I dated girls. I hated myself. I attempted suicide. I survived. I hated myself. I came out. I struggled. I tried to love myself. I met my best friend, my soulmate. He taught me to love myself. He was murdered. I was destroyed. I gave up religion. I accepted myself. I tried to love myself. I mourned. I learn(ed). I battl(ed) depression. I suffer(ed) anxiety. I  accepted myself. I tried to love myself. I was fat. I hated myself. I was too gay. I hated myself. I was ugly. I hated myself. I was unlovable. I hated myself. A 17 year love crushed my soul. I tried, and failed, at loving myself. I got *** I hated myself. I was successful. I tried to love myself. I traveled the world. I was the consummate extrovert, the life of the party. I loved myself. I fell in love. He killed himself. I was destroyed. I hated myself. Am I unworthy of love? I hated myself. I pour myself into helping others. Do I love myself? I keep trying. I keep living. Somedays are good. Somedays not so much. Somedays I love myself. Somedays not so much.
#mystory#lgbtq#queer#suicide#depression
tarheeltodd
Written by
tarheeltodd
50/M/North Carolina
Jun 21, 2018
Jun 21, 2018 at 10:14 AM UTC
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