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When my hair is short and my face becomes coarse from days' age, I cannot tell myself apart from my father. In mirrors and photographs and the eyes of who I love, I see my father before I see myself.   My father's dimmed reflection through mine; my successes, failures; these my father make with me. I see my father sick in his son's cigarette smoke. I see how my sleep makes him healthy. I feel my father's calm, honest tremble at the animal inside of me. My father's stillness when the glass under my skin breaks. My father's smile beneath mine.   I speak and it is my father's voice. My father's voice of reason, my father's desperation.   My father's voice under mine speaking to that missionary:             *(I cannot trust conditional morality as an absolute truth)                       (I won't trust ****** even if it calls me friend)            (I know love happened before you invented God)*   Beneath my laugh, the echoe of my father's joy.   Beneath my violence, my father's fear. Beneath my awe, my father's humility.   I see my father with me, I see me,   my father's son, my father's son, my father's son.
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Aug 21, 2012
Aug 21, 2012 at 6:04 PM UTC
Working Title
When my hair is short and my face becomes coarse from days' age, I cannot tell myself apart from my father. In mirrors and photographs and the eyes of who I love, I see my father before I see myself.   My father's dimmed reflection through mine; my successes, failures; these my father make with me. I see my father sick in his son's cigarette smoke. I see how my sleep makes him healthy. I feel my father's calm, honest tremble at the animal inside of me. My father's stillness when the glass under my skin breaks. My father's smile beneath mine.   I speak and it is my father's voice. My father's voice of reason, my father's desperation.   My father's voice under mine speaking to that missionary:             *(I cannot trust conditional morality as an absolute truth)                       (I won't trust ****** even if it calls me friend)            (I know love happened before you invented God)*   Beneath my laugh, the echoe of my father's joy.   Beneath my violence, my father's fear. Beneath my awe, my father's humility.   I see my father with me, I see me,   my father's son, my father's son, my father's son.
--5279
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Aug 21, 2012
Aug 21, 2012 at 6:04 PM UTC
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