it takes
a special kind of
self loathing
to reach for a
bottle
as your eyes are
opening
to begin
the process of
poisoning yourself
as darkness
dissipates
blind to the orange
explosion
the yellow and red hues
now encapsulating
the sky
the warmth
and radiance of
The Sun
as its rays
blanket my world--
a sensation I willingly
betray
a sense of happiness I consciously
ignore
as I sit in my
dark room
Shot
After
Shot
trying to (literally)
d r o w n
my sorrows
that creep up
behind closed eyes
unleashing upon my
mind as lids part
running rather than
fighting
choosing to sink
when I could be
swimming
The Sun is high
encouraging plants to dance
and animals to wake
and yet I wither
in an enclosed space
my roommate returns
from an overnight shift
to find me
intoxicated
inebriated
vomiting
in bed
the day is beginning
but my life
feels over.
When will I finally see the light?
Jul 9, 2017
Jul 9, 2017 at 11:17 AM UTC
it takes
a special kind of
self loathing
to reach for a
bottle
as your eyes are
opening
to begin
the process of
poisoning yourself
as darkness
dissipates
blind to the orange
explosion
the yellow and red hues
now encapsulating
the sky
the warmth
and radiance of
The Sun
as its rays
blanket my world--
a sensation I willingly
betray
a sense of happiness I consciously
ignore
as I sit in my
dark room
Shot
After
Shot
trying to (literally)
d r o w n
my sorrows
that creep up
behind closed eyes
unleashing upon my
mind as lids part
running rather than
fighting
choosing to sink
when I could be
swimming
The Sun is high
encouraging plants to dance
and animals to wake
and yet I wither
in an enclosed space
my roommate returns
from an overnight shift
to find me
intoxicated
inebriated
vomiting
in bed
the day is beginning
but my life
feels over.
When will I finally see the light?
When I was an alcoholic in denial.
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