I'm sorry I spend so much time talking about how lost I am
It has cost me my friends and their respect
I'm sorry that my life is changing too fast for me to process
I won't come out of this with my mind intact
I apologize for the way I grow distant in a conversation,
in the buzz around boyfriends, grades, and prom
I can't say sorry enough for the times I explode for no reason
and then go suddenly quiet and terrifyingly calm
I have no disorder or chemical imbalance
its not a physiological decay or disease
Its a girl questioning why she exists
and trying to figure out what life means
I'm sorry that I'm not always there for you when you need me
I can understand why you left me behind
Just, please
keep the crazy, depressed, confused girl in the back of your mind
Please don't forget that I was once happy
Please remember that I had a personality prone to joy
Tell me about the girl that you used to know years ago
the unshakable faith she had before it was stripped down, destroyed
I wouldn't un- ask these questions
I couldn't forget them if I tried
But I wish that the naive little girl
had kept some of that innocence inside
I talk a lot about reflections
about how I feel when I'm in my head, apart
I hope that you can fogive me
and my broken but healing heart
May 8, 2016
May 8, 2016 at 11:15 PM UTC
I'm sorry I spend so much time talking about how lost I am
It has cost me my friends and their respect
I'm sorry that my life is changing too fast for me to process
I won't come out of this with my mind intact
I apologize for the way I grow distant in a conversation,
in the buzz around boyfriends, grades, and prom
I can't say sorry enough for the times I explode for no reason
and then go suddenly quiet and terrifyingly calm
I have no disorder or chemical imbalance
its not a physiological decay or disease
Its a girl questioning why she exists
and trying to figure out what life means
I'm sorry that I'm not always there for you when you need me
I can understand why you left me behind
Just, please
keep the crazy, depressed, confused girl in the back of your mind
Please don't forget that I was once happy
Please remember that I had a personality prone to joy
Tell me about the girl that you used to know years ago
the unshakable faith she had before it was stripped down, destroyed
I wouldn't un- ask these questions
I couldn't forget them if I tried
But I wish that the naive little girl
had kept some of that innocence inside
I talk a lot about reflections
about how I feel when I'm in my head, apart
I hope that you can fogive me
and my broken but healing heart
E.B.
