A skinned knee, a bruised elbow.
I hurt myself today.
A paper cut, frostbite from the snow.
I hurt myself today.

Injuries from play.
I hurt myself today.
But my pain is only fleeting.
Laughing with friends I forget that;
I hurt myself today.

Alone in my room.
I hurt myself today.
Not from play, Not a scrape or bruise.
I hurt myself today.

JackiePilled-

I hurt myself today.

May 22, 2026

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2026

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leslie-philibert

Honest poem, you have a clear voice, keep writing. As my old English teacher said, make it new, make it true, make it you...

Archorex

Wow! This is an amazing first poem! 🖤 I really like the contrast between types of pain, and the rhyme scheme got me hooked immediately. Also, welcome to Hello Poetry! I&#39;m excited to see more of what you write!

goongabe

hihi! i really love this poem, and i find it quite impressive if it&#39;s actually your first one. it&#39;s really strong, and i love that about it! also, i recommend finding your tone before publishing another poem; it helps a lot!

william-a-poppen

I especially like the first two verses.&nbsp;&nbsp;Would like a bit more in the last verse about your hurt.&nbsp;&nbsp;A solid start.&nbsp;&nbsp;Keep at it.

AlanBaxter

For a first poem, this is incredibly brave and very well-structured. The contrast between the physical, visible injuries from &#39;play&#39; and the quiet, hidden pain at the end is really striking. Using the repetition of &#39;I hurt myself today&#39; works perfectly to build that tension and show how the meaning of the phrase changes when you are alone.

As a tip for writing more: you have a natural instinct for rhythm and contrast. Keep exploring that difference between what the outside world sees and what happens behind closed doors. You have a powerful voice, so keep writing!

HelloPoetry

A strong start. Welcome to the community. Do keep writing.

WhitHowland

I love this. It&#39;s raw and has a Punk Vibe going on.

Dark-Crow

It&#39;s a good start, Jackie. There&#39;s the ultimate rhyming dictionary and word hippo for all the words you need, online.&nbsp;&nbsp;Keep writing.

cj-sutherland

I really like the hook at the end that it could be more than one thing leaving the reader hanging and wanting more brilliant

nitopran_

The repetition is very in tune with the message of this poem … it appearing twice in each stanza gives us a sense of expectance at its next appearance which makes the lines between hit harder. 

AWESOME-SAUCE !!!

JamesAdriaanHarrison

You are on your way. Take heart and keep going (but do not hurt yourself). You have already discovered that repetition can be a powerful technique in poetry.

VerseBuster

This is a very strong first poem because the repetition gradually changes meaning as the piece unfolds. What begins with ordinary childhood injuries slowly becomes something much heavier and more personal. That emotional shift is handled really well.
I also liked the contrast between laughing with friends and being alone in your room, which gives the poem a quiet sadness without overdoing it. Most importantly, the poem feels honest, and honesty is something readers connect with very quickly.
You definitely have good instincts as a writer. Keep writing.