"Leave me alone." You said to me.
And I did as I was told.
Keeping my distance miles and miles away from you
without my voice, my presence, my thoughts.
But I'm afraid I need to close the space between us
just this once
and ask that you hear me out
before I continue living without you
in this lonely world.
It's not your sympathy or forgiveness I seek.
I'm not asking you to love me
or let me love you again.
I need you to understand
how hard leaving you alone is.
Leaving you alone has been the worse pain killing me
more than loving you ever was.
Everyday I commit myself to leaving you alone
putting my feet deep in the sands of time
I think would help erase you from my present day,
but instead
I find myself in circles leading me back to you.
If there was a God,
He would honor my request to take my life
lest I be spared of this curse.
Yet it serves me for losing my way.
Losing you.
Losing us.
Memories infect my brain
of our first and last times.
In my dreams,
you're at my bedside telling me
everything will be alright. We can be fixed.
And when I wake up,
you're not there as you were in our morning routine.
You're scent still lingers on my pillow adding salt to my wound.
I look back at pictures of us on my phone
and they stare back at me as if to say,
"Look what you've thrown away.
Was it worth it?"
I revisit every place
where we shared a meal,
laughed, talked, kissed, dance, made love.
I'm so pathetic
walking by your job building,
stopping by your house to see
if the light is on in your window
placing my hand against your door.
The same door I can't knock on
because it will never open up to me again.
Even if it did,
you just see me as the stranger I turn myself into.
I check text messages I sent you
with read receipts as your only response.
Perhaps I should be grateful
you even saw my words.
I even wrote this poem.
All this to make sure that you're happy.
Even if you're not with me
and probably with someone who loves you
better than I did.
I can spend the rest of my life
redeeming myself through countless actions
until my debt is paid.
Waste my breathe with explanations and apologies,
whatever it takes to bring us both back home.
But you don't have anymore energy to fight with me.
I drained you of so much.
Now you see.
I can't leave you alone.
But this time I will.
Just look me in my eyes and tell me,
even now as of this very moment
after everything we ever been though
say that you don't love me anymore.
Finish off my suffering with those words
and this will be my final appearance.
I promise.
But I can't promise that I will stop loving you.
No matter where I am or what I'm doing, you are
my prison, my life sentence.
My torture, my execution.
The punishment I deserve.
Apr 6
Apr 6, 2026 at 3:09 AM UTC
"Leave me alone." You said to me.
And I did as I was told.
Keeping my distance miles and miles away from you
without my voice, my presence, my thoughts.
But I'm afraid I need to close the space between us
just this once
and ask that you hear me out
before I continue living without you
in this lonely world.
It's not your sympathy or forgiveness I seek.
I'm not asking you to love me
or let me love you again.
I need you to understand
how hard leaving you alone is.
Leaving you alone has been the worse pain killing me
more than loving you ever was.
Everyday I commit myself to leaving you alone
putting my feet deep in the sands of time
I think would help erase you from my present day,
but instead
I find myself in circles leading me back to you.
If there was a God,
He would honor my request to take my life
lest I be spared of this curse.
Yet it serves me for losing my way.
Losing you.
Losing us.
Memories infect my brain
of our first and last times.
In my dreams,
you're at my bedside telling me
everything will be alright. We can be fixed.
And when I wake up,
you're not there as you were in our morning routine.
You're scent still lingers on my pillow adding salt to my wound.
I look back at pictures of us on my phone
and they stare back at me as if to say,
"Look what you've thrown away.
Was it worth it?"
I revisit every place
where we shared a meal,
laughed, talked, kissed, dance, made love.
I'm so pathetic
walking by your job building,
stopping by your house to see
if the light is on in your window
placing my hand against your door.
The same door I can't knock on
because it will never open up to me again.
Even if it did,
you just see me as the stranger I turn myself into.
I check text messages I sent you
with read receipts as your only response.
Perhaps I should be grateful
you even saw my words.
I even wrote this poem.
All this to make sure that you're happy.
Even if you're not with me
and probably with someone who loves you
better than I did.
I can spend the rest of my life
redeeming myself through countless actions
until my debt is paid.
Waste my breathe with explanations and apologies,
whatever it takes to bring us both back home.
But you don't have anymore energy to fight with me.
I drained you of so much.
Now you see.
I can't leave you alone.
But this time I will.
Just look me in my eyes and tell me,
even now as of this very moment
after everything we ever been though
say that you don't love me anymore.
Finish off my suffering with those words
and this will be my final appearance.
I promise.
But I can't promise that I will stop loving you.
No matter where I am or what I'm doing, you are
my prison, my life sentence.
My torture, my execution.
The punishment I deserve.
This is poem about broken love. For those who make mistakes in relationships or missing someone they once loved. My inspiration for this piece was listening to Love In The Dark by Adele.
