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karaissiPoems
******* i thought i already knew what it felt like to lose someone forever. and yet, i still sit here shellshocked stunned. in my mind i imagine the crunch of metal grinding in my ears over and over. you were probably asleep in the backseat. one moment, dreaming the next, gone. last year i lost a bet with you "you have to go out to get hotpot with me at least once" you said. last week you told me you weren't feeling so well -- not sick -- just sad. and though you mentioned suicide, you brushed it off "nah you're right, we haven't gotten hotpot yet. i can't just die" but then you did. last night at 5:20pm you texted me "this car ride is so longgggg i made a meme do u wanna see it" i didn't respond until the next day, but last night by 6:47pm you were already gone. and i sit here now in the steam of hotpot for two, hands pressed against my eyes i can feel my eyelids trembling bitter bitter tears dripping into the broth. but it makes no difference to me. hotpot will always always be bitter without you
0
May 30, 2019
May 30, 2019 at 2:22 PM UTC
hotpot
******* i thought i already knew what it felt like to lose someone forever. and yet, i still sit here shellshocked stunned. in my mind i imagine the crunch of metal grinding in my ears over and over. you were probably asleep in the backseat. one moment, dreaming the next, gone. last year i lost a bet with you "you have to go out to get hotpot with me at least once" you said. last week you told me you weren't feeling so well -- not sick -- just sad. and though you mentioned suicide, you brushed it off "nah you're right, we haven't gotten hotpot yet. i can't just die" but then you did. last night at 5:20pm you texted me "this car ride is so longgggg i made a meme do u wanna see it" i didn't respond until the next day, but last night by 6:47pm you were already gone. and i sit here now in the steam of hotpot for two, hands pressed against my eyes i can feel my eyelids trembling bitter bitter tears dripping into the broth. but it makes no difference to me. hotpot will always always be bitter without you
rest in peace
#death#loss#grief
karaissi
Written by
karaissi
20/F
May 30, 2019
May 30, 2019 at 2:22 PM UTC
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