Darling, sweetie, treasure,
I searched my heart for you.
Alas, I found it empty,
Like your chat, your charm, your clue.
You strut as if you're dazzling,
A star! A gem! A prize!
But glitter needs some substance,
Not just ego in disguise.
So take this little valentine,
A kiss blown through a sneer.
If fabulous were catching,
You’d still be nowhere near.
Feb 13
Feb 13, 2026 at 8:58 AM UTC
Darling, sweetie, treasure,
I searched my heart for you.
Alas, I found it empty,
Like your chat, your charm, your clue.
You strut as if you're dazzling,
A star! A gem! A prize!
But glitter needs some substance,
Not just ego in disguise.
So take this little valentine,
A kiss blown through a sneer.
If fabulous were catching,
You’d still be nowhere near.
I recently rediscovered a forgotten verse form that fell out of favour around the turn of the 19th century: the delightfully sharptongued Vinegar Valentine. Consider this my attempt to bring the tradition back to life.
Request permission to use this poem