Paralyzed by who I am
And who I have become
When did I
Become so numb?
When did I
Fake all emotion?
Lying to those whom I love most
Held nearer and nearer to my heart
Dearer and dearer
But still
They slip
Realize
And I fall
When did I
Become so cold?
When did I
Become ashamed?
I no longer feel things
I am certain I should
Unknown to the existing realm
Tread upon by all
Each moment
Never left alone
Yet it shall never be
Where is the real me?
I'm lost
This tears every fiber
Every molecule, atom, element
Filament
So ******
So helpless
Unable to carry its almost non-existent weight
Seeing everything
Heart just started gunning
Running
Hide
Escape the terror
Locking myself in
Cornering myself
Hands over my ears
Thud
Over and over
I still hear it
Covering my own ears
Unable to prevent the sound
Repeating in the confines of the brain
This **** brain...
Which,
I hope to flip the switch
To off...
- Jay M
May 21st, 2019
May 21, 2019
May 21, 2019 at 7:44 PM UTC
Paralyzed by who I am
And who I have become
When did I
Become so numb?
When did I
Fake all emotion?
Lying to those whom I love most
Held nearer and nearer to my heart
Dearer and dearer
But still
They slip
Realize
And I fall
When did I
Become so cold?
When did I
Become ashamed?
I no longer feel things
I am certain I should
Unknown to the existing realm
Tread upon by all
Each moment
Never left alone
Yet it shall never be
Where is the real me?
I'm lost
This tears every fiber
Every molecule, atom, element
Filament
So ******
So helpless
Unable to carry its almost non-existent weight
Seeing everything
Heart just started gunning
Running
Hide
Escape the terror
Locking myself in
Cornering myself
Hands over my ears
Thud
Over and over
I still hear it
Covering my own ears
Unable to prevent the sound
Repeating in the confines of the brain
This **** brain...
Which,
I hope to flip the switch
To off...
- Jay M
May 21st, 2019
Too much
Request permission to use this poem