I don't enjoy the physical pain I cause myself
but it numbs the emotional pain
I do it out of fear
that if I were truly feel happy and okay
that one day my heart would break and there would be no fix
and that the rush of emotions would be overwhelming
but at least with the bruises and scratches I'm used to feeling something unpleasant
and heartbreak isn't as threatening I'm ready for it
I want the pain
Aug 9, 2021
Aug 9, 2021 at 10:32 PM UTC
I don't enjoy the physical pain I cause myself
but it numbs the emotional pain
I do it out of fear
that if I were truly feel happy and okay
that one day my heart would break and there would be no fix
and that the rush of emotions would be overwhelming
but at least with the bruises and scratches I'm used to feeling something unpleasant
and heartbreak isn't as threatening I'm ready for it
I want the pain