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specifically an attempt on your life is odd it's not the first time you've welcomed death but it is still odd to be alive you don't know where to put your hands or how to feel safe with yourself you can tell everyone looks at you a bit funny because you're different most people have thoughts about suicide but they don't actually take as many pills as you did and have done in the past it doesn't feel right to be here sitting in this chair nothing feels right everyone expects you to stay and you don't want to scare them but god how lovely would it be if the attempt had been successful you don't know where to put your hands you kind of are floating through the days for a while you don't talk about it much because you don't want to be triggering or to burden or scare people but dying is always on your mind it's not like it left I still believe the only way for me to be at peace is to be buried six feet deep because I don't know where I'm ******* supposed to put my hands and my entire body is not my own I am absent from myself and I am a ghost all alone no one can ever reach me this deep in my head and I can't get out so why can't I just ******* die? **** you for wanting me to stay I'm in ******* pain
0
Dec 16, 2021
Dec 16, 2021 at 4:41 PM UTC
existing after an attempt
specifically an attempt on your life is odd it's not the first time you've welcomed death but it is still odd to be alive you don't know where to put your hands or how to feel safe with yourself you can tell everyone looks at you a bit funny because you're different most people have thoughts about suicide but they don't actually take as many pills as you did and have done in the past it doesn't feel right to be here sitting in this chair nothing feels right everyone expects you to stay and you don't want to scare them but god how lovely would it be if the attempt had been successful you don't know where to put your hands you kind of are floating through the days for a while you don't talk about it much because you don't want to be triggering or to burden or scare people but dying is always on your mind it's not like it left I still believe the only way for me to be at peace is to be buried six feet deep because I don't know where I'm ******* supposed to put my hands and my entire body is not my own I am absent from myself and I am a ghost all alone no one can ever reach me this deep in my head and I can't get out so why can't I just ******* die? **** you for wanting me to stay I'm in ******* pain
maxisgay
Written by
21/M/nowhere important
Dec 16, 2021
Dec 16, 2021 at 4:41 PM UTC
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