I haven't been able to think about you without crying
To look at your picture on my wall was too painful
It may have been better if you had died, like Dominick
But you didn't, no you still exist
Strong and persistant in my memory and alive and well somewhere else
I wonder if you meant all those hurtful words you said
I saw pictures of you today happy and smiling
Did I really make your life a sad dark hell?
Or is that just what you're telling yourself
Is that just your sad pathetic excuse
For giving yourself a reason to cut me loose
Because we were drifting a part so slowly
You were the only person who knew me that well
To know the little words that would **** me
So you made sure to say them, knew what insults to spew
I'm starting to think you wanted me to hate you
You told me not to cry, but you knew I would
I'm telling myself all the things you knew I would
That i'm a horrible person, I don't deserve to be loved
That all of my efforts were wasted, never enough
But I hope you know, I'm not the only one I blame
I'm not dense enough to think friendships are one way
You could've made an effort, you could've made a step
Hell there are so many different things you even could've just said
Let me know where we were headed, cause I didn't even know
But instead you left me here all alone
Justifying your actions with the things that killed me
Along with stupid other petty things
You said you feel "I'm adjusting just fine"
Then suggested you'll live your life, and I'll live mine
Whatever happened to the days, for thirteens years
Where we were like family through blood sweat and tears
Your mom isn't there for me like another mom anymore
All of your selfish (or was it selfless) motives closed that door
I keep blaming myself, I rant and then I blame you
I go down the long list of all the stupid reasons why our firendship is through
And what it boils down to, is we bit off more then we could chew
This distance was too much for us it tore us both apart
You were just the stronger one, for finally freeing your heart
May 3, 2011
May 3, 2011 at 8:35 PM UTC
I haven't been able to think about you without crying
To look at your picture on my wall was too painful
It may have been better if you had died, like Dominick
But you didn't, no you still exist
Strong and persistant in my memory and alive and well somewhere else
I wonder if you meant all those hurtful words you said
I saw pictures of you today happy and smiling
Did I really make your life a sad dark hell?
Or is that just what you're telling yourself
Is that just your sad pathetic excuse
For giving yourself a reason to cut me loose
Because we were drifting a part so slowly
You were the only person who knew me that well
To know the little words that would **** me
So you made sure to say them, knew what insults to spew
I'm starting to think you wanted me to hate you
You told me not to cry, but you knew I would
I'm telling myself all the things you knew I would
That i'm a horrible person, I don't deserve to be loved
That all of my efforts were wasted, never enough
But I hope you know, I'm not the only one I blame
I'm not dense enough to think friendships are one way
You could've made an effort, you could've made a step
Hell there are so many different things you even could've just said
Let me know where we were headed, cause I didn't even know
But instead you left me here all alone
Justifying your actions with the things that killed me
Along with stupid other petty things
You said you feel "I'm adjusting just fine"
Then suggested you'll live your life, and I'll live mine
Whatever happened to the days, for thirteens years
Where we were like family through blood sweat and tears
Your mom isn't there for me like another mom anymore
All of your selfish (or was it selfless) motives closed that door
I keep blaming myself, I rant and then I blame you
I go down the long list of all the stupid reasons why our firendship is through
And what it boils down to, is we bit off more then we could chew
This distance was too much for us it tore us both apart
You were just the stronger one, for finally freeing your heart
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