The indignity
Of you who gave me life
On a cold, passion-filled, loveless night
Your young skin
On her old bones
You who hid from the cradle
The bat-catcher
The apologetic on the phone
Lying amidst the ruins of
Dreaming of
Scents and spices
Hot flames licking the back of your hand
Pastries dancing
On grilled lamb shanks
Do you often wake in the middle of the night
As I do
And wonder if there was something you could do
but didn't
And then willed yourself into
Nonexistence
The indignity
Of being forgotten by a part of yourself
Of losing your soul to the mistakes of the past
Dec 15, 2014
Dec 15, 2014 at 9:52 AM UTC
And I want to be honest with you
And feel the chill run through my body
My spine, hands, feet
As I pull up the courage
from the depth of my soul
Feel it bubbling in my throat
Dancing on my tongue
And watch it escape
As I enunciate each
(painfully honest)
word
Watch it escape
as a warm puff of air
Jul 20, 2014
Jul 20, 2014 at 12:37 PM UTC
A Kingfisher for lunch
Lost in a daze
I'm just a drop in the ocean, you said.
Let's not forget the moment
Let's not forget Foster and mutton curry
Let's not forget that somewhere out there there's me
The sound of their steady voices
Mercy of strangers
You are unhinged and you don't know about it
The yearn for something more than this
Oh, young lady, fool us, please
You laughed and welcomed me to the club
And you know, oh, how you know
That I'm new and stupid
And yet you laughed with me
Jun 6, 2014
Jun 6, 2014 at 1:15 AM UTC
i found a hole in which i could hide, in which my thoughts are safe from you.
i jump to conclusions, and i'm not good with names.
i change too fast, and i hide too well.
try to remember the last time you had taken a good look at me.
you do not remember my face.
but i remember. i remember everything.
if i had a heart i would have worn it on my sleeve.
i found a whirlwind in which i could throw my secrets into,
in which they come out muddled beyond comprehension.
i think too quickly, and i pretend too readily.
try to remember how many times have i said goodbye to you.
you do not know my voice.
but i know. i know nothing.
if i had a soul i would have cried out for you.
i found a pool in which i could fish, in which i use pieces of myself as bait.
i am too many things, for too many people.
i lie too willingly, and i influence too effortlessly.
try to remember the last time you had resisted me.
you do not recognize my touch.
but i recognize. i recognize weakness.
if i had a body i would have yearned for you.
but alas, i have none. you do understand cruelty but you do not understand me.
Apr 29, 2014
Apr 29, 2014 at 5:11 AM UTC
the pretty words you swirl around with your tongue
like candy
a moment of sweetness
before it disappears down your throat
a mess of colored spit and
broken resolutions
Jan 21, 2014
Jan 21, 2014 at 10:55 AM UTC
the pretty words you swirl around with your tongue
like candy
a moment of sweetness
before it disappears down your throat
a mess of colored spit and
broken resolutions
Jan 21, 2014
Jan 21, 2014 at 10:55 AM UTC
"The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of." - Holly Golightly, Breakfast At Tiffany's
i've been having the mean reds lately.
it's a paradox. how you're never the best, but when better ones come along, they pale in contrast to you. somehow i've come to love you in all your averageness, found beauty in your flaws. somehow your insignificance gave me a place to settle upon.
it's comfortable in your arms, and your smell assures me. please never allow me to lose you.
Sep 23, 2013
Sep 23, 2013 at 11:45 PM UTC
in your drunken stupor
your fingers drawing stars in the sky
scars in my heart
i watch you stagger
and you know i'd leave you if i ever felt unwanted
you are not the best
but i still want you
maybe we could go back to when we had no reason to love
but did anyway
or we could stay here
and tell ourselves this is love
"And in the end we were all just humans, drunk on the idea that love, only love, could heal our brokenness." - F. Scott Fitzgerald
Sep 23, 2013
Sep 23, 2013 at 11:38 PM UTC
some days the inside of your mind is the safest place to be
some days you feel trapped
sometimes you are so tired of wasting more energy on the wrong people
but the right ones are so far away from you
so near yet so far
and you want to reach out but you don't because you're afraid
because rejection are for the undesirable
and you know everything about being undesirable
and you don't like looking like a fool
because life is cruel to fools
you long for the world where everyone around you was smart and witty and fun
but that world spit you out long time ago
now you have to pretend to be entertained by tasteless jokes and mindless comments
from people who think in a different way
and you're so disgusted but all you can do is pretend and pretend and pretend
so the ones with shining eyes don't look your way
you pretend you're all fine and dandy
while you scream silently inside your head
and you're tired, so tired, always tired
May 15, 2013
May 15, 2013 at 2:57 AM UTC
the tortoise creeps under broken flower pots
like an ancient dragon guarding its lair
the cat lies on the cold concrete floor
a terrific hunter in its dream
it's always summer in this city
the girl sits under a tree reading
while the sun pours onto her brown locks
framing her face like a honeyed waterfall
anointing her with a golden halo
the boy looked at her
and wonder if he could ever breathe again in her presence
if he could ever be something more in her eyes
May 15, 2013
May 15, 2013 at 2:54 AM UTC