i have no more to spend of heart or grace,
nor coin of hope to buy another dawn.
yet in thine green eyes I find a fleeting place,
like warmth that lingers when the fire is gone.
the winds grow cold, the seasons lose their hue,
& Time, that tyrant, marks our brief estate.
still pup, let me dream the tender dream of you,
though all the stars foretell a faded fate.
please, lend thy hand, and let me call thee mine,
though only shadow binds thy soul to me.
for love, when lost, still seeks a form divine,
& finds its echo where it used to be.
if all must end, then end upon this plea.
pretend thou art my world, though it deceive.
Feb 21
Feb 21, 2026 at 7:01 PM UTC
with you on concrete & paint
no, i won't throw that away this time
my heart open & full of the sun's rays
running away & into this beautiful Fall
but it's near midnight now
& i never thought it'd be so simple
dance with me here
& plant your seed into my cobblestone *****
where & here
there were warmth
& i transfer & give it to you
awkwardly & sincerely but not desperately
not this time
this time puppy
i tell you it's cold here
& this time i focus on the future
with its snow
& with my socks wet
& with me tossing
& with me turning
& slapping my ear
inferno
so very angry that this bloodsucker is here
hiding my demons
& hauling them here & there
into church
& then into the bathroom
i sing
& i *****
& into there i collapse
into your heart & into your scar
some hazy story about who he was
or my intention
Jupiter holds a moon & expels me
& Saturn holds my ring & inhales me
here in this thresher
the old bayonet
& the knee crunching
the rib scratched
& the ambrosia
softly & slowly
pooling up & falling
from wound & from Christ's
sharing His sentiment
& his flame
a kiss from the hem
& i'm sewn together
my glass eye falling & stuck
staring at our messiah as i lift & am pulled
i am a womb with a love so true
truth of the matter i'd give it to you
you just have to slow down
& quit acting that way
burning our barn in this ***** tonk flame
removing this eye
tossing it aside
unsure of the fit
or the meaning
unfit to fix my illness
my messiah looks up towards me
as i slink into this alley
rubbing my nose
& feeling my knuckles' wound
fill with someone else's blood
again
i tell you
it's clear & it's now
& i tell you that i'm still & i'm
warm with intent
yet repetition fails me
& that isn't magic
that isn't supernatural
nearing clairvoyance
& out of my mind
i move into country
& forget the city's pennies
& both of their worth
is it more than me
is it easier than me
is it listening & deserving
these fall & slide off as easy as my skirt
& i am asked to share
& i look
into the messiah's eyes with
mine own good and behaved
an angel broken
& me slowing down
on the rope
on the rope
good
and for nothing
i'm still & i'm tied
finally present & finally still
(satellite, encompass me & sever this confusion
it was north my heart faced
& south which they left behind
now it is you & I
me with tears on my feet & mud in my eyes
simpler dishes I cook & break
shorter hairs i trim & fret over
if i stare into this book & if my eyes fall apart
if i drool into this alley & soak in the loss,
i'll be free
i'll be still)
***
Act II.
i'll find my injury
Act III.
Finally.
Act IV.
& sweetly, quietly,
painlessly
without regret,
mistake or confusion.
Act V.
I'll close my eyes & disappear
Nov 23, 2025
Nov 23, 2025 at 12:47 PM UTC
until i fall from the 13th floor
i am going to stop talking & only murmur
i am going to whisper & stop this wonder
why decide if i can't
& why decide if i only
shiver & shake from morning to noon
until i fall from the 12th floor
i am going to soak in what my child left.
it is emptiness
& two pens
why move forward & why
move me to feel?
until i fall from the 11th floor
i am going to continue this simplicity
& greet, not retch at warmth or conversation
until i fall from the 10th floor
i am going to close my eyes
opening yours & then blinding mine
until i fall from the 9th floor
i am going to pull us close & divide
i am falling from the 7th floor
& i am going to give myself grace
it's not too late
& i am falling from the third floor
there's the rest which will never come
my hand reaches out for the second floor
& my voice whimpers for you
my hand retracts
& crumples into me
pushes into my heart
& now I'm finally close & open for you
head to heart
heart into lungs
lungs towards my liver
my hair toward my ankle
& then to feet
(i bend and change for you now)
(& i beg for grace)
as i hit the floor.
Nov 20, 2025
Nov 20, 2025 at 8:16 PM UTC
it's as if there were no hand
& no fork
my mouth scoops or stretches
the bottom lip
it is
inside
oh, it scrapes against the
one side of the wall
i picture the blinds
& isolate
my nose in the corner
trying to see the hook
twirl and surround itself
with this blinds' thread
if it were string, you'd unravel
if it were fall, you'd stay closed
it is a dream & it is warm
the water green
the dock high
& my little brother falls into
the same dream
he swims away
from alligators & from me
& i pause
& i tell his ghost
& i remind myself
there's no difference
Nov 19, 2025
Nov 19, 2025 at 7:27 PM UTC
the river's ice between my teeth
my small heart exposed
slow & white
my eyes black with rot
curious
i see your call
shoulders haunched & thin
watching yours turn
what am i
who am I
a new scar here
an abscence of some force you knew
my teeth drop
is it clitter clatter
or were it pitter patter
the bridge is lit
this river, dead or dark
as yet, frozen
rain, sleet, wind
my fangs fall away before my snarl
makes use
it is you
faces you
a small goal is granted
a warm wish in this naked winter
i held a heart once, nurtured & loved
granted breath and warmth
i howl and crawl away
into a new grave
the soil turned
stony, grey & salted
did you think of me?
did you remember me?
did you call for me
or were it just my memory?
Sep 12, 2024
Sep 12, 2024 at 10:59 PM UTC
it's high midnight and I'm up to my old tricks again
in an hour I'll have my nose prepared
in two, I'll sweat and pray
praying the windows I opened last year give way to Carolina air
me chewing an ice cube
with you pressing my shirt
and a shiver breathes into me
it's a funeral, you tell me
in twelve hours time I ask you how I got here
another hour and it's your voice
causing me to laugh from my belly
pounding my fists into your tombstone
too angry to light my cigarette
the willow hides the moonlight
sheds no tears on this chapter
the willow hides night sky
a reflection from my dark eyes
they warble in fear
for the sound my heart is like to make
it's three years later
chewing soil from your grave
the worms but ash
my heart
a muted trumpet
pale imitation
crystalline defeat
silhouette of a cursed shade
it's five years and the marble runs smooth
it's ten years and the willow roots join mine
a legacy of agony
countless copper dishes of bitterness
thirteen years a testament of longing and needless suffering
every smile bled to death
every night a star turned inside out
it's two years ago and I hear your name
Sep 12, 2024
Sep 12, 2024 at 10:28 PM UTC
i'll fall into a gold mine
licking wounds that were never mine
mid may, my casket turns
violent proof this heart can burn
you halve my heart
i die from lack of a heart
Aug 20, 2024
Aug 20, 2024 at 9:25 PM UTC
chewing the scar
it's something given
confused, please grant me this burr
guilt & I dance into your throat
your ghost losing me
together now
searching your left behinds
one strip of me
pale, finally open & quiet
walking away
Jul 9, 2024
Jul 9, 2024 at 2:47 AM UTC
fold me into place
it's a free ticket
my petal falls off
Jul 9, 2024
Jul 9, 2024 at 1:35 AM UTC
she lays with control
on your left
my axe falls
I'm changing lives
inside this final pocket
Jul 9, 2024
Jul 9, 2024 at 1:31 AM UTC