I'm bleeding out, like ink on paper
My heart stopped beating, my chest is an empty crater
Today I died again, just like I did yesterday and the day before
But I've stopped minding, I'm too numb to feel sore
Later when I'm done ruining the sheets, and I'll have nothing more left to bleed
I'll turn my head, and find they've been bleached
And now, you can't see the red stains, or smell death in the stitches
Quick, before the lights turn on, change the scene, flick the switches
Let's make me the mastermind behind my own death
Let's play that game where you knock out my breath
We've been playing for so long, I've gotten used to dying
But recently it hasn't been much fun, when I'm the only one left crying
Jul 2, 2016
Jul 2, 2016 at 4:40 PM UTC
I'll push people away
and then say I'm lonely,
I'll say I have no friends
and then call us all squaddies
-
Running from the fire I tended to,
I'll leap into your arms
Though I know you'll burn me to the ground
and then you'll raise the alarms
-
I'll accuse you of being mysterious
While building up my own walls
I'll try to break yours down
And collect the bricks before they fall
-
I'll make my own misery
I'll burn my own boats,
Then complain about not
being able to stay afloat
-
Alienated in my own body
Lost in my own soul
Foreign in my own head,
Down a perpetual rabbit hole
Jul 1, 2016
Jul 1, 2016 at 8:51 PM UTC
Sometimes I'll hear your footsteps
in the empty hallway
And your laughter
in the vacant living room
I'll smell your perfume
in the musty closet
And feel your wit
in the silent dinnertime gloom
Sometimes I'll wait for your smile
Standing at the gate at 2:45
And wonder what you're doing, how you're feeling,
and what you cooked last night
So I'll call you up after office hours
but there's nothing to say
Still, just listening to the silence between us
is enough to make my day
I'll lament over the memories we can't make
and the inside jokes we'll never know
The premiers we're missing out on
The feelings I'll never show
I know you're doing your best
to protect and shield me always
but all I really want is
a Cadbury and a protective embrace
Because I want to hug you
all the time, everyday
And not just when we're saying goodbye
before you get into your car and drive away
Happy Father's Day.
© Copyright
Jun 19, 2016
Jun 19, 2016 at 7:49 AM UTC
it's 4 am and i'm still up
in the city of the half-dead
alone with my racing thoughts
insomniac nights are the best
Apr 10, 2016
Apr 10, 2016 at 2:03 PM UTC
I joke about being lonely all the time, but I don't think anybody gets that it isn't a joke anymore.
Apr 8, 2016
Apr 8, 2016 at 6:30 PM UTC
she handed over different pieces of herself to different people
but never could find anyone willing [or able] to take her whole
Apr 8, 2016
Apr 8, 2016 at 5:43 PM UTC
picture perfect plastic dolls
line up in the ballet hall
masks adjusted, shoes pulled on
the cameras flash, the lights are on.
flaunt their figures, beguile the boys
wildly pirouetting with a perfect poise
a silent chorus of envy they sing
patch the masks and sew a grin.
the curtain falls, the masquerade drops
her pointe shoes are all worn out
her toes are bleeding, her ankle’s sprained
but a sparkling reputation she has claimed.
a perfect picture of plastic dolls
lined up with their masks all on
the colours fade, the angle’s changed
to show beneath, their melted face.
Apr 8, 2016
Apr 8, 2016 at 5:35 PM UTC
You can’t hear my screams through this house’s thin walls
I can’t reach the shore in your paper lifeboat
You can’t pull me up as I drown while afloat
I can’t help but by this spiralling stairwell be enthralled
I leap over, hurtling towards the water beneath
Blood splatters on the walls, crimson swirls in the sea
You scrub the water coarse, trying to strain the impurity
But my wounds are still open; they continue to bleed
The cycle keeps repeating, as history tends to
You’re tired of all this melodrama that keeps unfolding anew
You think it’s all rehearsed, that it is not impromptu
So I perform behind closed doors, waiting for your cue
During the entr’acte, I wait in the dark
The spotlight’s gone out, the character has not
I have been typecast in this role for too long
It’s become second nature so I play along
Apr 8, 2016
Apr 8, 2016 at 5:32 PM UTC
She was a symphony of sonorous phrases
Resonating off my blank walls
She clutched her vibrant set of words
Like crayons to colour in my lines
She made me beautiful with her poetic eloquence
She made me complete with her florid taste
She wrote me into her enigmatic songs
Which I mistook for love in haste
Slowly, her speech became psittacism
Her endearment became animosity
But her fallacious incantations transfixed my gaze
And I was caught in her blind idolatry
The poison in her insidious words
Tore through my skin and tissue
Overwhelmed my immunity
As she recited an amused eugloy
Apr 8, 2016
Apr 8, 2016 at 5:26 PM UTC
The final page is where it all makes sense
The panorama is complete
Where you tie up loose ends
And you're not supposed to cheat
But we flipped to the last page
We broke all the rules
Trying too hard to abate
The inevitable whirlpool
And everyone knows you lose interest
If you know how a story concludes,
What's the point in reading
When you know what ensues
But we, we couldn't take it
We ripped out the words
We scribbled on new ones
Attempted to make them work
For years we rioted against kismet
Running around in circles
Defying the looming doom
Pretending to be eternal
It drove us insane, the unending gyre
As we convinced ourselves we were forever
Until one day the faded page floated by
And we lurched at it together
Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 12:46 PM UTC