vande-barringer
I have been a closet poet my whole life and am thrilled to have a place to display my thoughts. Unfortunately, much of my poetry is very morbid but that's what helps me to be such a happy and insightful person. My poetry is my heart put on paper. All of the emotions that I cannot speak out loud flow through my fingers. Putting them into verse or rhyme helps me ponder over what the real problem is and sort it all out.
Some days I can't get out of bed
I just can't bear to lift my head
Sometimes it hurts to breathe
My pain continues to seethe
Why did I just yell at them
They're taking blood again
I wish the results were clear
My life is at a full tilt veer
I can't believe it might be cancer
God **** it! just give me the answer
Is that even a possible at nineteen
I guess not they say I'm clean
So what is it then
I guess it's back to the doctors again
I'm losing all my lucious locks
And my stomache is always on the rocks
I'm sick of being sick
My future is being ****** by a tic
What a vicious nasty disease
Please God cure it please please please
I want to play with my daughter
I want the energy to get even hotter
I'm so young it seems so unfair
I want done with this whole affair
Maybe next time
But for now I'll end this rhyme
Oct 17, 2010
Oct 17, 2010 at 12:10 AM UTC
Lies fall like rain
Rain falls like tears
Tears flow like thoughts
Thoughts flow like fears
Fears scream like words
Words scream like lies
Lies fall like rain
So my heart cries
Oct 16, 2010
Oct 16, 2010 at 11:38 PM UTC
You said you'd never leave me!
Said you'd never turn away
How could you let this happen
Did you go out to play
I thought you said you loved me
Or did you change your mind
You may say it's all OK
But do you think I'm blind
You may be here beside me
But you're miles and miles away
And yet I looked around to find you
And found that I had run away
Oct 10, 2010
Oct 10, 2010 at 11:34 PM UTC
My halo's been broken
My wings have been stolen
I can't please you anymore
My horns are now dulled
My pitchfork is broken
I can't hurt you anymore
I'm here and unmasked
Tell me what you want me to be
You're worst nightmare
Or your sweetest dream
Oct 10, 2010
Oct 10, 2010 at 11:31 PM UTC
I'll wait here on the shelf
I'll wait for you to see me
I'll wait for you to pick me up
I'll wait for you to use me
I'll wait and wait and
I'll wait some more
I'll wait for you forever
If that will make you happy
I used to be your favorite
I was always in your hand
But now I'm just an artifact
Of an old forgotten land
Oct 10, 2010
Oct 10, 2010 at 11:27 PM UTC
The bullet is cold
And sits heavy in my hand
No need to etch your name
Since you're the problem at hand
The metal rolls through my fingers
Just like the thoughts through my head
So icy and cruel with a vicious intent
Tormenting, all the lies that were said
But even worse were the truths
That so harshly were fed
It's been to my fortune
That you never have seen
All of these tears
That I continually bleed
All that I want
Is for you to see
Every one of my weaknesses
And every part of me
But you unlike the bullet
Never wanted to see
Anything more
Than the outside of me
My physical beauty
Outnumbered by flaws
Once I looked in the mirror
And what did I see
A perfect porcelain doll
Staring back at me
But like a rock to a window
Were your words to my heart
And I watched myself shatter
I just fell apart
You've just absolutely killed
Inside your shining star
So blinded by your thoughts
No one knows who you are
I tried to find out
But I wasn't strong enough to stay
Now both of us are miserable
And I don't know what to say
So now I'll solve both our problems
With one single shot
A toast to no more pain
A toast to no more drama
Another for no more sin
And again for no more trauma
Now forever in your head
A thought like a fang
Forever you will hear
That last fatal BANG
Oct 9, 2010
Oct 9, 2010 at 11:04 PM UTC