*My mind is in a foggy state
when I’m waking.
Condensation leaking from
my concentration.
Can’t tell the difference,
what’s real or my imagination.
How can I keep my world from quaking
when every little thing
grows bigger and the ground starts shaking?
Conscience coincide with science.
I could never follow trends,
I’m too defiant.
Indigo until the end,
I’m too reliant.
I **** everything in silence...
You and I, a plus.
Me? Alone?
Minus*
Aug 26, 2018
Aug 26, 2018 at 12:08 PM UTC
I'm losing colors in my waters.
The fog in my brain is thickening
and I'm afraid there is a monster.
My breath is steady quickening,
what if I think I'm the imposter?
The thought of it is sickening,
but up there is a higher place
of not racing in thinking things.
With my back against an old tree,
I hope no one can find me.
If they don't understand
what's going on with me
then I can't withstand
the barriers of my sensitivity,
and the sea of regret
comes rushing rapidly.
I'm prone in the force of my zone.
I knew something was altered
when I felt it in my bones.
Stay committed and I fit in
where the normal don't belong.
There's a black sheep in my home.
It's funny how I always feel alone,
even with familiar faces
smiling through the phone.
You've felt it before,
but that'll change when I'm gone
and the mic is on the floor.
Nov 16, 2017
Nov 16, 2017 at 7:56 AM UTC
*I️ am a lonely faucet
crying crocodile tears.
Bound to the fear
of facing my fears.
What I see ahead of me
is darkness beheading me;
any future is dead to me.
I am a zombie,
I slipped like I'm wasted
and feeling sloppy.
Currents take me to the flood
to drown me in tsunami
with my senses left behind me;
everything is dead around me.
Life can be a hex,
overdosing stress.
The moon will call
and after all,
the colony recalls.
Better on and better off.*
Nov 15, 2017
Nov 15, 2017 at 11:44 AM UTC
*Figured you had enough
because I'm alone.
Dialing to call your bluff
but there is no tone.
You think you wanted more,
but I could've shown you more.
Figured I fell too deep
in the abyss of my dreams.
Underwater underworld,
don't wake me from sleep.
Figured that you figured me out,
but nothing's what it seems.
Prescribe me prescriptions
to bottle these emotions,
devour my devotion
and keep refills in motion.
Above the surface is dry
but underneath is an ocean.*
Nov 9, 2017
Nov 9, 2017 at 10:20 AM UTC
Tainted by the truth,
I fail before the finish line.
I fell the more I closed my eyes,
and it's the easy way
to get away, to contemplate,
is it my turn today?
To see what's left after fate
is to no longer see anyway.
Fixated,
I'm bound to the stake.
Chest ripped wide open,
here's my heart to take.
You thought love was fake
until you felt the warmth I gave,
but then it was too late.
I'm hanging by a string,
I might let go of this thing
that's been keeping me
from being me.
With no options to weigh,
I pull myself away.
Nov 8, 2017
Nov 8, 2017 at 8:54 AM UTC
Mama, where is the light?
I'm lost in my direction,
my heart beats deep in the night.
You were the only one who'd listen
but I continued to hide
behind the truth that wasn't missing.
You are gone and I'm still living
but not really living.
Nothing but pain that I've been given,
I've been driven
to the neverland of nothingness.
Mama gave her all and nothing less,
but what she left behind was all a mess.
She was here and felt pain
but still loved the same way
and that was a beautiful gift.
Only for her sake, I will never take
no one else for granted that way.
Picture waking up from a bad dream,
mama is fixing herself
something to eat.
I'm so happy she's here,
I don't want her to leave,
but she looks at me sadly
like she couldn't believe.
Only then I realized,
I'm still in a bad dream.
Oct 29, 2017
Oct 29, 2017 at 2:58 PM UTC
*I'm corrupting this system.
I'm breaking the lock on these chains
before I give in to the system.
The fire's burned up all the rain
and leaving us trapped in this rhythm.
I'm headed to the other way
cause I just can't fit in with them.
Why am I so different from them?*
Oct 29, 2017
Oct 29, 2017 at 12:30 PM UTC
*Twist and turn
my head spins
on my neck.
I forget to breathe
then it's over for me.
Beneath a rock
in the middle of the sea
the sharks surround me.
Is anyone looking
for me?
Overlooking what
is left of me?
I'm gone and all I see
is what I won't believe.
I can't let it go
so I bend to the will.
Under submission
I surrender and I reel
into the upside down.*
Oct 24, 2017
Oct 24, 2017 at 4:34 PM UTC
*I'm weeding,
cutting these emotions
from the roots beneath.
I'm heated
while the sun is burning me.
Indigo, where do I go?
We go
as far as we can
from the low.
The low is your ghost
awaiting the host.
Wading from what's
waiting below.
Storm reigns
to take away our pain.
We drown and die
in the name
of the higher place.
Overdosing, overthinking.
I'm sinking
and you're winking
on my way downward.*
Oct 24, 2017
Oct 24, 2017 at 9:48 AM UTC
*I find myself
questioning what comes after,
the eyes roll back
and the lids stay closed.
I find myself
looking for the hereafter
tripping over bones.
Reflections staring back at
my soul,
as if there's something wrong.
I find myself
on the other side,
can't seem to coincide
with my other life.
I divide,
multiplying override.
Losing track of time,
my mind don't seem to mind.
This black and white place
is missing the grey space,
I pace with a ******* face.
Stuck in hereafter,
I wonder what comes after.*
Oct 21, 2017
Oct 21, 2017 at 10:49 AM UTC