An orca earnestly swimming
Inside a tank at Sea World
Believing he's swimming in the ocean
May 12
May 12, 2026 at 3:31 AM UTC
I was a little kid.
My neighbor was a grown man.
"I'll fix your wagon," he roared.
I was already crying.
Then he hurried to his garage,
Returned with a toolbox,
Knelt down with pliers and screwdriver,
And did just that.
Mar 27
Mar 27, 2026 at 10:13 AM UTC
From Tales From The Manosphere
Bear
For those women who chose the bear,
True you won’t get *****
But before he mauls you to death
You’ll realize he smells really, really bad.
Jan 2
Jan 2, 2026 at 12:36 AM UTC
Celebration
Tall, handsome, eyes light, hair curly,
He didn’t have a job and still lived at home,
But his frumpy mom clearly adored him
And he walked around our town as if
His mere existence was cause for celebration.
Years later, after his untimely demise
I realized—he was right.
Aug 4, 2025
Aug 4, 2025 at 5:53 PM UTC
You’re not allowed to say it.
You’re not allowed to even think it.
Not when the two thousand pound bombs are yours.
May 11, 2025
May 11, 2025 at 4:55 AM UTC
Dressed in Sunday finery,
Feeling virtuous,
I’m reading the Gospel
And listening to the preacher’s sermon
In my head: "I will think good thoughts.
I will tread the righteous path.
I will avoid sin like the plague—"
But come Saturday night,
Several beers in at the meat market,
I'm thinking otherwise.
May 1, 2025
May 1, 2025 at 10:19 AM UTC
Stuck?
Start with "Once upon a time,"
End with "and they lived happily ever after,"
Write some **** inbetween,
Then send if off to The New Yorker.
Now grab a beer, sit back and wait
For the acceptance notification
And a generous contributor’s check.
Apr 26, 2025
Apr 26, 2025 at 9:43 AM UTC
After dinner, a nap and a good stretch
he eyes the living room sofa,
eager to sharpen his claws.
"No Kitty no."
"Bad Kitty!"
Still, fleeing from me,
a dying bird in his jaws,
Kitty is as innocent as the day he was born.
Feb 14, 2025
Feb 14, 2025 at 2:53 PM UTC
We talk about cold fronts
and warming trends.
We talk about imminent storms.
Hail, frost, wind.
The long hot summer.
We nod, smile, commiserate.
We talk about the weather
To keep from killing each other.
Sep 1, 2024
Sep 1, 2024 at 5:35 AM UTC
A slug slogging along
The surface of the pavement
And arriving.
It's not a dream.
It's not a nightmare.
Go Buddy, go!
Aug 20, 2024
Aug 20, 2024 at 1:31 PM UTC