I decay
The smell of my own rotting flesh,
Fills the stale air
Lips, that once graced softened skin are gone
Baring jagged teeth and exposed jaw bone
Ears, that so loved any melody,
Have long since turned to blackened jerky
I lay in this satin lined box,
Decaying,
My fingers, Are no more than fragments
of once workable things
Worms and maggots long ago,
devoured what little piece of heart you left me with
It's dark in here
And still
I don't rest
Feb 28, 2017
Feb 28, 2017 at 2:46 PM UTC
I have etched 'no' everywhere on my skin
So the next time you come near
When you touch me and the bumps rise
It can scream what I have never had the strength to say
Feb 28, 2017
Feb 28, 2017 at 2:41 PM UTC
I miss the phantoms of you..
I miss you haunting me..
I use to be afraid of your ghost..
And then you left..
I could never leave..
I wish you would come back..
But you left because of me..
And I stay because of you..
But time one day whispered into my ear..
And told me I was the phantom, I was the ghost that scared you away..
It seem like only days..
But truly they were years..
And you returned to me..
Silver and gray..
And showed me a way to heaven..
Feb 28, 2017
Feb 28, 2017 at 2:40 PM UTC
I hope my words
float in your head
like multicolored balloons
unraveled from their weights
Your sun stained hair
no longer melts
between my fingers
Feb 28, 2017
Feb 28, 2017 at 2:36 PM UTC
Did you know?
I have vines growing around my ribs now.
A tree growing in my guts where I used to hold galaxies.
Churning stardust catching between teeth,
Painting my lips.
Seeping out of my skin and into the sink.
I am a book of metaphors and paradox.
I am nothing at all.
I speak you fair with a liars tongue,
All made of silver and moondust.
Easy words.
I am celestial,
And though your starstuff still makes me sick in the mornings,
Picking your shine from my teeth
All your refuse still inside me wretched into the sink.
Though my limbs are scarred with an effort to see my own galaxies
I am through obsessing over celestial souls.
Too many boys and girls with stars in their eyes
Or Saturn's rings around their fingers
Have caught me with lunar promises and magic fallen from careless lips
Like meteor showers.
I'm rid of my stars.
Now I've been planting flowers in my ribs
The vines mingle with a web of forget-me-nots and bleeding hearts
Lavender buds sprouting from old scars
I pass the 3 am itch off as them growing
Learn to ignore it.
Feb 21, 2017
Feb 21, 2017 at 8:33 AM UTC
Wobbly knifes, nervous on
diner tables
How are you?
I wish I didn't know why
you are not here
exploring foreign floors
together where our feet meet
sinking into waiting steps
the hum's amplitude increases
as I fade out
to a state of mind
framed around you
built upon your grounds
Blurry eyed under hotel covers
where a man on a mission
scales fences that block
building backs.
This unanticipated destination
where have we found ourselves
by getting lost?
Feb 20, 2017
Feb 20, 2017 at 10:33 PM UTC
the stillness
of this innocent gloom
of the lanterns silently gazing at the open field, wet,
swaying
as the slow evening whispers, sighs
waiting for the sky to fall back into the sea
I'm sitting here
on the wet wooden stairway
and thinking of you
Feb 19, 2017
Feb 19, 2017 at 6:30 PM UTC
I somehow feel the need to apologize.
Still.
After all this time.
You sang like I was made of the earth and the wind
The lovely things.
And when I said those three words for the first time
And you repeated them...
My heart stopped and my soul flew.
I was ready to give up my freedom and my future for you...
Then you say we're growing apart,
You tell him that you never loved me, don't like girls, dated me out of pity
And I cried for five hours straight while my heart broke and my mind screamed
'I told you I'm not a girl.'
Labor day isn't the same even all these years later.
I still have to tell myself it's not my fault.
You were on fawns legs,
The who am I what I am where do I fit that comes with adolescence
And you spoke me fair from the moment we met.
I was so happy to finally have someone who saw me for me.
I told you so soon
'I'm not a girl, I know it's hard to understand but...'
And you say you don't care, nothing changes, I see stars in your eyes
And I'm so happy to hold your hand in the hallway,
No matter who stares.
I should expect the backtracking. The fear.
Your parents, who knows what they'd do.
And you break it off quietly.
Saying you don't think you really like girls.
I am still not a girl.
We don't really talk now. I just find it hard to feel anything but tired when I'm near you.
Then you. You are a girl made of startuff.
Your heart among the planets and constellations.
I call you starshine and eventually
I hope. I ask. I confess.
I admit I planned my life with you.
Big city apartment, stargazing far away from life,
Leaving small town made of quicksand for higher hills and brighter skies.
And you were the only one who ever called me by my name.
Called me a boy.
Gave me anything that felt real.
And I know it hurt you to hurt me.
I gave you my heart and you treated it as tenderly as you could have.
I don't fault you for that. I don't fault you for anything.
No matter what you make me feel real
And I always have loved the stars.
Feb 18, 2017
Feb 18, 2017 at 10:17 PM UTC