silentangel - Hello Poetry

When you're dead, does it really mean you're gone? Does it mean I'll never see you again? Does it mean i will never hear your voice, full of love and protection? When you're dead Do you still see me? Do you watch over me? Can you hear my thoughts? Can you hear me pleading for you? When you're dead Does it really mean your gone? Do you still think about me? Care about me? Will you still be my best friend? When you're dead Does it really mean you're never coming back? Never going to be there to run to, Never going to be able to hug or love again When you're dead Can you hear my cries? See the tears that fill my eyes? Can you see the longing in my heart to know that you're okay? To know that you are no longer in pain. When you're dead Does it really meant that you are gone?

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 11:21 PM UTC

silentangel

Are You Really Gone

When you're dead, does it really mean you're gone? Does it mean I'll never see you again? Does it mean i will never hear your voice, full of love and protection? When you're dead Do you still see me? Do you watch over me? Can you hear my thoughts? Can you hear me pleading for you? When you're dead Does it really mean your gone? Do you still think about me? Care about me? Will you still be my best friend? When you're dead Does it really mean you're never coming back? Never going to be there to run to, Never going to be able to hug or love again When you're dead Can you hear my cries? See the tears that fill my eyes? Can you see the longing in my heart to know that you're okay? To know that you are no longer in pain. When you're dead Does it really meant that you are gone?

24

So many new things Mostly beautiful Some not so much Still everything has changed my life But one thing stands out more than the rest Something I have never had before Like a new support Making me feel stronger Blowing like the wind Cold and strong Putting out the fire Removing the pain that had once covered my heart Breaking down the walls, that once protected it But wanting to open up Reaching into the darkness and taking the soothing hand knowing that good lies on the other end Wanting to give in and let it all be okay But so scared that with a single slip up it will all go away Pulling back Staying in between the layers of strength and comfort and familiarity of darkness and hiding The fire causing more pain on some days then on others Some days I reach out and take the hand not quit fallowing but excepting the fact I have a choice Other days I curl up in the darkness Feeling the burn more inside Melting my heart like a candle But instead of it falling into the darkness and disappearing Something catches it Holding it Molding it into something Something new Something better Something stronger Looking up it;s not just an outstretched hand anymore A person reaching out Pulling me to my feet Pulling me out of the darkness Pulling me into a hug Into a new place A happier place A feeling I've never felt before The love of a dad So strong So patient So much more then I could ever ask for.

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 11:09 PM UTC

silentangel

Love of A Dad

So many new things Mostly beautiful Some not so much Still everything has changed my life But one thing stands out more than the rest Something I have never had before Like a new support Making me feel stronger Blowing like the wind Cold and strong Putting out the fire Removing the pain that had once covered my heart Breaking down the walls, that once protected it But wanting to open up Reaching into the darkness and taking the soothing hand knowing that good lies on the other end Wanting to give in and let it all be okay But so scared that with a single slip up it will all go away Pulling back Staying in between the layers of strength and comfort and familiarity of darkness and hiding The fire causing more pain on some days then on others Some days I reach out and take the hand not quit fallowing but excepting the fact I have a choice Other days I curl up in the darkness Feeling the burn more inside Melting my heart like a candle But instead of it falling into the darkness and disappearing Something catches it Holding it Molding it into something Something new Something better Something stronger Looking up it;s not just an outstretched hand anymore A person reaching out Pulling me to my feet Pulling me out of the darkness Pulling me into a hug Into a new place A happier place A feeling I've never felt before The love of a dad So strong So patient So much more then I could ever ask for.

52

You tell me to look up But you're never there I want to trust you I want to believe what you say But it always seems to be a lie No matter how many times I tell myself "tomorrows a new day" My heart still breaks when I look to see you not there My hands still outstretched Waiting for you to be there Like a lost child I look for you to be there Not realizing That you don't care if I crash and fall You wont be there As long as you are lifted up It doesn't matter to you what happens to me What my outcome may be No matter the amount of tears that have streamed down my cheeks You have never been there to wipe them away You have never been there to hold me and tell me things will be alright How can you call yourself my mother When I have spent my life raising myself.

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 10:46 PM UTC

silentangel

Mother?

You tell me to look up But you're never there I want to trust you I want to believe what you say But it always seems to be a lie No matter how many times I tell myself "tomorrows a new day" My heart still breaks when I look to see you not there My hands still outstretched Waiting for you to be there Like a lost child I look for you to be there Not realizing That you don't care if I crash and fall You wont be there As long as you are lifted up It doesn't matter to you what happens to me What my outcome may be No matter the amount of tears that have streamed down my cheeks You have never been there to wipe them away You have never been there to hold me and tell me things will be alright How can you call yourself my mother When I have spent my life raising myself.

23

Falling, crashing down As my world falls apart It all begins to change Everything that once was, is gone The laughter of children The chirping of birds singing their songs under the warm summer sun GONE Darkness blankets the sky Taking the sun away The laughter and songs fall silent The warm summer day Turns to a chilly fall night Watching it all disappear In the place I once called home All gone up in flames A place once full of love and happiness Where two best friends once played dress up and told stories about their future prince charming Where brother and sister once played games A mother and daughter with a bond so strong You never thought they could be separated Watching a family So close fall so far apart When the place they once called home Came crashing down

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 10:33 PM UTC

silentangel

Crashing Down

Falling, crashing down As my world falls apart It all begins to change Everything that once was, is gone The laughter of children The chirping of birds singing their songs under the warm summer sun GONE Darkness blankets the sky Taking the sun away The laughter and songs fall silent The warm summer day Turns to a chilly fall night Watching it all disappear In the place I once called home All gone up in flames A place once full of love and happiness Where two best friends once played dress up and told stories about their future prince charming Where brother and sister once played games A mother and daughter with a bond so strong You never thought they could be separated Watching a family So close fall so far apart When the place they once called home Came crashing down

26

Come on already Just let me ******* die Float up to the sky I'm tired of living this **** lie That's all its ever been Every word out of your mouth You didn't mean a single one I gave up all hope It's never going to get any better Every word you ever spoke It didn't mean a **** thing Hell, you were to high up on dope to notice I was slipping away Out of your reach Hell, I shouldn't have to be giving this speech I am just a teen This is **** i shouldn't be seeing Pain I shouldn't be feeling Words I shouldn't say Things I wish would just disappear at the end of the day.

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 10:23 PM UTC

silentangel

Silence Out Loud

Come on already Just let me ******* die Float up to the sky I'm tired of living this **** lie That's all its ever been Every word out of your mouth You didn't mean a single one I gave up all hope It's never going to get any better Every word you ever spoke It didn't mean a **** thing Hell, you were to high up on dope to notice I was slipping away Out of your reach Hell, I shouldn't have to be giving this speech I am just a teen This is **** i shouldn't be seeing Pain I shouldn't be feeling Words I shouldn't say Things I wish would just disappear at the end of the day.

20

A life full of ups and downs Heartbeats and heartbreaks Two paths born to cross Best friends, sisters Two hearts beat Two lives lived Just for a few moments together Then separating again Hope and prayer to one day be reunited forever Tear filled eyes Full of joy and sadness Looking down Wanting to protect her from the pain you know and feel But knowing you can't Smiling through the pain so she won't see Her looking up to see you standing strong knowing somethings wrong Not understanding but knowing she is not alone A connection A bond that will never break Together you stand strong and weather the storms Together you show the world your love Together you are sisters Two lives born to live life together The lives of two separate people made to love and care for the other

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 6:38 PM UTC

silentangel

Sisters

A life full of ups and downs Heartbeats and heartbreaks Two paths born to cross Best friends, sisters Two hearts beat Two lives lived Just for a few moments together Then separating again Hope and prayer to one day be reunited forever Tear filled eyes Full of joy and sadness Looking down Wanting to protect her from the pain you know and feel But knowing you can't Smiling through the pain so she won't see Her looking up to see you standing strong knowing somethings wrong Not understanding but knowing she is not alone A connection A bond that will never break Together you stand strong and weather the storms Together you show the world your love Together you are sisters Two lives born to live life together The lives of two separate people made to love and care for the other

24

Feeling the whole world crashing down Spiraling out of control Where did the time go All those days spent under the sun Melting away like the snow So many thoughts and all I can say is "I don't know" I don't know you I don't know me It's like we are living in a tragedy Full of smiles and fake faces Lies and defeat Just tell me why did you cheat Life maybe be just a game But who are we to blame when we tear everything down using our own two hands Who are we to say that someone else is at fault When we can't even figure out what's right and what's wrong Because when it's wrong you think it's okay because it feels so right, so freeing But you step out and try to do the right thing the true thing and get shot down and shamed so you think it's wrong you doubt yourself you try to redo what has already been done But listen can you hear it A voice saying resist give it all to me Can't you see that your not alone that you can stand up Just turn around and shut up Look into the sky because he did not just die He gave his life a living sacrifice Because he knew that one day you would need a helping hand that you would need someone to help you take a stand. So listen to me and take his hand there is a place he has promised were we will never stand alone..

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 6:22 PM UTC

silentangel

Hand It Over

Feeling the whole world crashing down Spiraling out of control Where did the time go All those days spent under the sun Melting away like the snow So many thoughts and all I can say is "I don't know" I don't know you I don't know me It's like we are living in a tragedy Full of smiles and fake faces Lies and defeat Just tell me why did you cheat Life maybe be just a game But who are we to blame when we tear everything down using our own two hands Who are we to say that someone else is at fault When we can't even figure out what's right and what's wrong Because when it's wrong you think it's okay because it feels so right, so freeing But you step out and try to do the right thing the true thing and get shot down and shamed so you think it's wrong you doubt yourself you try to redo what has already been done But listen can you hear it A voice saying resist give it all to me Can't you see that your not alone that you can stand up Just turn around and shut up Look into the sky because he did not just die He gave his life a living sacrifice Because he knew that one day you would need a helping hand that you would need someone to help you take a stand. So listen to me and take his hand there is a place he has promised were we will never stand alone..

25

Reaching out Wanting you to see That I need you now more than ever But you are not there You never are I feel so stupid, Looking for you in the shadows Everywhere I go Wanting you to be there Wanting you to see Wanting you to want me Waiting and watching For any sign of a response But nothing No reaction Not response I miss your voice And the way you’d hold me The way you’d comfort me If I would wake up crying Every night you were gone I’d pray to god That he’d bring you home That you would be there tomorrow And never leave us again Always saying you had to work But really just trying to escape Scared I would crawl into your bed You were never there The sound of muffled weeping Breaking the silence Looking at the closet door Pain filling my heart You would ask to be forgiven For all the wrong you had done For not being able to do everything Sitting there not understanding I’d close my eyes and ask god To forgive me, to show me What I needed to do What it was that I was doing wrong. Waking up The feel of arms around my body Closing my eyes again Not believing Not understanding When I open them again It’s all gone again And so are you

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 6:17 PM UTC

silentangel

Gone

Reaching out Wanting you to see That I need you now more than ever But you are not there You never are I feel so stupid, Looking for you in the shadows Everywhere I go Wanting you to be there Wanting you to see Wanting you to want me Waiting and watching For any sign of a response But nothing No reaction Not response I miss your voice And the way you’d hold me The way you’d comfort me If I would wake up crying Every night you were gone I’d pray to god That he’d bring you home That you would be there tomorrow And never leave us again Always saying you had to work But really just trying to escape Scared I would crawl into your bed You were never there The sound of muffled weeping Breaking the silence Looking at the closet door Pain filling my heart You would ask to be forgiven For all the wrong you had done For not being able to do everything Sitting there not understanding I’d close my eyes and ask god To forgive me, to show me What I needed to do What it was that I was doing wrong. Waking up The feel of arms around my body Closing my eyes again Not believing Not understanding When I open them again It’s all gone again And so are you

49

Opening my eyes I see you I see your face But it's not yours Reaching out I feel you The touch of your skin So cold so lifeless Listening Trying to hear your voice one last time Nothing I don't understand Where could you have gone When I'm looking right at you But is it you? I don't recognize the person I see But I know who you are I remember climbing into your bed I remember telling you my biggest dreams and fears I remember you holding my hand And showing me the world I saw it all through your eyes You showed me that anything could be what you made it You just had to believe Believe in the good Always look for the light The star that twinkles in everything I did everything you said I looked to the light I made everything the way I wanted it to be Molded my mind like clay Made a window that faced the light I looked through it as much as I looked up to you Some days it never felt big enough Some days I couldn't find the light Some days I couldn't find you It's like you disappeared I shut the window and built a wall Locking myself in But still looking for the light Running in circles Looking for you Hoping you'd show me the light But you never did You never came back I see you everyday But I can never find you I open my eyes Day after day And your still not there Did you forget Did you lose sight The stars are gone I can't see the twinkle anymore The world is not the same As the sun sets and the darkness fills the sky I begin to wonder if you were even real If any of it was real But what does it matter now You are gone Everything is gone You are not who taught me to love Taught me to look at the world as if it was a master piece Painted and sculpted from the finest of things I see your face So pale and lost I feel your skin So cold and lifeless I listen for your voice But yet hear nothing Where did you go Why did you leave?

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Jul 31, 2016

Jul 31, 2016 at 6:11 PM UTC

silentangel

Untitled

Opening my eyes I see you I see your face But it's not yours Reaching out I feel you The touch of your skin So cold so lifeless Listening Trying to hear your voice one last time Nothing I don't understand Where could you have gone When I'm looking right at you But is it you? I don't recognize the person I see But I know who you are I remember climbing into your bed I remember telling you my biggest dreams and fears I remember you holding my hand And showing me the world I saw it all through your eyes You showed me that anything could be what you made it You just had to believe Believe in the good Always look for the light The star that twinkles in everything I did everything you said I looked to the light I made everything the way I wanted it to be Molded my mind like clay Made a window that faced the light I looked through it as much as I looked up to you Some days it never felt big enough Some days I couldn't find the light Some days I couldn't find you It's like you disappeared I shut the window and built a wall Locking myself in But still looking for the light Running in circles Looking for you Hoping you'd show me the light But you never did You never came back I see you everyday But I can never find you I open my eyes Day after day And your still not there Did you forget Did you lose sight The stars are gone I can't see the twinkle anymore The world is not the same As the sun sets and the darkness fills the sky I begin to wonder if you were even real If any of it was real But what does it matter now You are gone Everything is gone You are not who taught me to love Taught me to look at the world as if it was a master piece Painted and sculpted from the finest of things I see your face So pale and lost I feel your skin So cold and lifeless I listen for your voice But yet hear nothing Where did you go Why did you leave?

72

High up in the sky Smiling down on the earth A warm glow Mixes with the cool breeze Like a blanket Draped across my shoulders Spinning around Eyes closed and arms outstretched Letting it all go Leaving the past behind Stepping forward Out of the shadows And into the light Embracing the beauty Of this life Of the Things around me Letting the light Fill my body Watching the trees And sky become a blur As I tumble to the ground Laying on the ground laughing Watching the tall grass Dance around above me Tickling my legs and arms Like little kisses Making it all go away Replacing sadness With joy The sun beaming down Embracing my body Like a tight warm hug Lying there I thank god for you.

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Oct 7, 2014

Oct 7, 2014 at 12:07 PM UTC

silentangel

Dancing

High up in the sky Smiling down on the earth A warm glow Mixes with the cool breeze Like a blanket Draped across my shoulders Spinning around Eyes closed and arms outstretched Letting it all go Leaving the past behind Stepping forward Out of the shadows And into the light Embracing the beauty Of this life Of the Things around me Letting the light Fill my body Watching the trees And sky become a blur As I tumble to the ground Laying on the ground laughing Watching the tall grass Dance around above me Tickling my legs and arms Like little kisses Making it all go away Replacing sadness With joy The sun beaming down Embracing my body Like a tight warm hug Lying there I thank god for you.

34