today I read a book about a girl who rebuilt herself
who escaped the most dangerous prison in the world
also knows as her mind
today I read a book about a girl who decided to fight back and be okay
and I saw so much of myself in her
so I know I'll be okay
even my scars have scars of their own
and it doesn't hurt that much to bleed anymore
but I've realized that while the sky is bright I owe the sun appreciation
even though it's hurt me quite a bit
today I read a book about a girl who chose herself
and since today is a good day
I feel like I can be that girl
Jan 1, 2017
Jan 1, 2017 at 5:38 PM UTC
I have loved him the most I’ve loved anyone
daringly
unreasonably
carefully
softly
I’ve loved him like the colors you can’t see
I want him so much
but I hate his guts
He’s tried to make a soft girl out of a mad girl
I’ve hated him the most I’ve hated anyone
Wildly
Savagely
Harshly
Manipulatively
Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 2:47 PM UTC
death leaves you haunted
in the end you discover ghosts can give birth to ghosts
their children have always been stronger
there are voices in your head
soft whispers soft promises
children yearn to be held
how it hurts when you hold them close
there is no space between your hands
there has always been a void in your heart
hold them the ghost whispers
hold them remember us
listen listen listen
death leaves you haunted
you cannot **** the ghosts child
you are not empty enough to become a huntress
Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 2:40 PM UTC
Maybe it’s that you don’t understand how you feel about him,
that would be a lie.
Because the last thing you want to do is understand.
You want to say you don’t love him anymore,
you’re not in love like you were before.
You want to think that
the beginning is all that you miss.
Your friends, they would call him terrible,
they didn’t realize you were terrible to him too.
The fault wasn’t in your stars,
The fault was that your stars were too close
and even stars have a habit of devouring.
That’s all there is
to you,
to him
that’s all there is.
Because near the end
you had started becoming closer.
He showed his ugly sides to you
there is no lie in that,
but you loved him
with your fangs bared to attack,
and you were just as harsh, if not more
but he loved you.
He probably still does,
but now you love each other like people yearn to see ghosts.
Even though your love sounds painful
all you both could ever see
was the light in the other.
The sun reflecting off his cheekbones
as it turns your eyes the shade of brown that made him wonder
oh god, how lucky are we
for we were in love.
Now it’s become a misty memory,
it’s the days when you look at your guitar
and remember that the last hands to touch it were his
and then you’re terrified.
Touching the guitar,
might make your fingerprints overlap with his,
and that simple thought
leaves you lost
in the mist.
Sep 10, 2015
Sep 10, 2015 at 8:06 PM UTC
Thoughts are streams
of the ocean waves
and their tides
wash against my walls
which are
the borders of sanity
May 31, 2015
May 31, 2015 at 3:51 PM UTC
I'm only good at being young
so scared to get older
i'm good at being young
and making mistakes
and not taking the blame
i'm good at being young
watching people make mistakes
blaming myself
for things that can't change
for everything
That i could never control
I'm good at being young
and being alone
May 31, 2015
May 31, 2015 at 3:49 PM UTC
A few years ago
I was a oddball
and it wasn't cool
to like twilight
or have your uniform
tucked into your skit
it wasn't cool
to have erasers
shaped like hello kitty
in the ninth grade
I was an oddball
but I wasn't alone
I had a friend
my best friend
and she was important
I was an oddball
and I wasn't able to notice
whispers and giggles
behind my back
I was able to notice
the loud noises at home
but I left them alone
sometimes
not often enough
I was an oddball
and my friend decided she had had enough
of being associated with that oddball
and when I needed her
she left
to another group of people
leaving me alone
and suddenly vulnerable
I noticed it then
a bit too much
the giggles in school
the loudness at home
the silence in my soul
the loss of will
you didn't shatter me
not at all
you just shattered a wall
I had built
to tell myself
that not all people were bad
maybe I would just know one
or two
but you were three
and i lost my ability to lie
to myself
and say everything was alright
because it wasn't
alright
and I couldn't lie
and the sadness
oh the sadness
was a tide
a hurricane
a tsunami
and I was lost
in a war
within myself
I waited
so long
for someone to save me
I waited
for an Edward
or a Harry
or a Dobby
anyone
anyone at all
but no one came
and I was alone
I was so alone
it was depressing
and it took me a while
to realize that I needed to be
my own light
in a world of cruelty
I had started to drown
it was difficult to swim my way out
but I did It
I became my own light
I embraced myself
and I still fight sometimes
with that darkness
the ocean of sadness
but I'm helping myself
because it's true
that in a life of metaphorical darkness
you have to be your own light
it still hurts some days
I still wonder
at 12 am
why was I not enough
because I was sincere
and that wasn't enough
I was honest, and gentle
and that wasn't enough
and I still fight sometimes
with that darkness
that ocean of sadness
but I'm helping myself
because it's true
that in a life of metaphorical darkness
you've got to be your own light
Sep 7, 2014
Sep 7, 2014 at 3:49 PM UTC
I found love,
in the eyes of a boy.
Or should I say a man.
Who is as alluring as poetry
and just as elaborate.
I am surrounded by the ocean,
as I drown,
my vision turns black,
but he rescues me
and somedays I rescue him.
somehow,
we chase away the darkness
from each others hearts.
Aug 31, 2014
Aug 31, 2014 at 2:22 PM UTC