shelby-marie
I'm 17 years old. my birthday is January 15th. i have dark natural red hair. i have tan skin and brown eyes. i live with my single father. writing has always been a way for me to express myself because i feel like talking just doesn't get the point across... when i write, everything just flows through me, everything at once, it sets me free. / / well... that's me. any questions, please feel free to ask.
i wish i could reach out and touch your face,
to feel the sparks that tingle through my body at our
touch,
i wish i could feel your lips against mine, to
feel the way you want me,
i wish i could feel my head on your chest, to feel
your steady heart beat as you sleep
i wish i could feel your hands on my hips to bring me
closer as we kiss, to feel the love that you feel for me pour
through you,
i wish i could feel you hugging me from behind
with your famous smirk against my ear, saying you
want me and your deep **** chuckle rumble through
your chest when i shiver against you...
there are so many things that i can wish to feel from you... but what i want to feel the most is yours hands griping my hips to bring me closer to you and you whisper in my ear that you love me even though I've hurt you... selfish? maybe, but its all that i can wish for...
Mar 7, 2014
Mar 7, 2014 at 3:55 PM UTC
lets rewind...
back to the time we never met,
before our first "hi" and "bye",
before our first hug and kiss,
lets rewind a bit further, we're
still not there,
lets go back in time,
before your first layed your eyes
on me,
lets rewind,
no matter how much it hurts- don't stop...
we'd be better off,
this is our last goodbye,
lets rewind and go our separate ways,
forget about me in this lifetime and remember me
in our next,
just take the pain away,
so there's no more heart ache,
lets stop rewinding, we're here,
here's our last hi and bye,
our last hug and kiss,
the last time you'll ever lay your eyes
on me, this is our last everything in this lifetime,
but before all this ends, i just want you to know that..
i love you and we will be together in the next life...
now your heads held down, hands in your pockets.... and the saddest thing of all is that your walking away with tears streaming down your beautiful face..
Mar 6, 2014
Mar 6, 2014 at 7:36 PM UTC
i can think of a thousand ways to die, and you can pray to go god that i dare not to try, because at night, tears fall and I'm sorry that i cant tell you all, but everyday since i left him, i tell myself that everything will be okay... but i have to face the fact that, everything is falling apart and so is my heart... i miss him, and until I'm with him again i will only continue to fall apart and think of a thousand ways to die.
Mar 6, 2014
Mar 6, 2014 at 7:10 PM UTC
I want to scream until my lungs give out,
I'm tired of being silent, I'm tired of feeling
This monster inside me pace back and forth, I'm
Afraid to let it lose because I don’t want to be like
You, so I close my eyes and breathe in deep to compose
Myself, but truth be told, I'm dying inside,
I'm tired of being the bigger person all the **** time,
I've never truly experienced what its like to be a kid,
I got stuck raising my brother while you drank your
Pain away till you finally reached your breaking point
And would beat me, I'm tired of smiling through the pain
And the blood I shed for you, I've done my time,
I'm tired of living in fear of you, to expect to come home
To you with the smell of alcohol and the belt that would
Be waiting for me, I'm tired of lying to my brother about the
Bruises I would have because I didn’t want him to know what
A monster you were, instead I would lie and say just another
Fight with a kid at school,
I'm tired of being called names and being pushed around,
I'm tired of being a mother to my little brother when I
Should be busy fighting with him instead of raising him,
I was at the point of giving up, but then I would look at him
And he was what kept the fire going, to wake up the same way;
Always another hit, another bruise, another tear, and a lot more
Fear….
I'm tired of being afraid of losing you… because even though I'm
Afraid of you, I still love you because you’re my mom… I'm afraid one
Day ill come home and you won’t be waiting for me- drunk with a belt
In your hand ready to beat me… instead you’ll be laying in bed, dead…
I wouldn’t know what to do because you wouldn’t be there to call me
The familiar names I've come to accept as each lash came down…
Truth is… I've come to accept it... That this is your way of saying you
Love me… but at the end of the day… I may be angry with you…
But I still love the monster that you’ve become because this is the only
form I've ever seen come you come in- a monster
Feb 5, 2014
Feb 5, 2014 at 3:52 PM UTC
my heart feels like its torn in two,
why cant i just be with you?
everyday another tear,
everyday a lot more fear,
i want to hold you in my arms,
i want to keep you safe from harm,
i act like things are all okay,
but really.. i just want to run away,
i act like things are all alright,
but i always seem to just end up
in a fight, i cry more tears than i
can count; why wont you just let me
out???
i continue to tell myself that
one day I'll be strong enough to
walk away... because i cant
continues to just sit here and watch
you love her...
you have my heart, and its like you
don't care because every kiss you give to
her is like another tiny dart piercing through
my heart.
I'm tired of watching you love her,
I'm tired of hearing those "i love you's"
that hold no promise, my heart is breaking,
and i know that you don't care... but what else
could i expect from a one way love???
someday ill have the courage to love again...
Jan 15, 2014
Jan 15, 2014 at 1:31 PM UTC
i love you forever and today,
when we kiss, this feeling
never goes away,
your my soul- my life,
my heart- my pride,
someone to love, a
peace at mind,
i miss when you go,
i cry when you say this
is the end..
you've said it before, but
your more than a friend,
your my savior, with endless
favors...
you hold me when I'm sad,
you smile when I'm glad,
so please trust me even though
I've lied... promise me you'll miss
me forever when i say goodbye,
when you don't talk, i honestly
get scared, for more than an hour,
i just cant bare, you've seen me on
my darkest days... and you still love me
because you say that there is no other way...
so even though it's the end,
i miss you...
and i love you, forever and today
Dec 27, 2013
Dec 27, 2013 at 3:22 PM UTC
behind closed doors, no one can see,
the pain locked behind closed doors lies;
broken hope and shattered dreams,
behind closed doors is living death,
it'll take your heart as you gulp your
last breath
behind closed doors, no one can see,
the lies I've become that have made me,
behind these doors holds my fear, every
thought and every tear...
behind closed doors is every lie,
every failed love and eternity,
behind closed doors, lies a broken me,
a broken girl, with broken dreams...
this is me...
behind every closed door is;
one waiting to be opened,
filled with one dream realized,
and one dream broken...
and now... I'm a broken girl,
with broken dreams...
Dec 27, 2013
Dec 27, 2013 at 3:10 PM UTC
through the eyes of a liar,
is the dream that killed her soul,
its a feeling hard to miss,
it left her alone and cold...
she was shun from life,
she felt bitter sweet, because
she'll cry tonight with ****** cuts
so deep,
little remorse for her,
all she wanted was a friend,
head held down... this is the
end for her....
Dec 27, 2013
Dec 27, 2013 at 3:02 PM UTC
we are only given today, and never promised tomorrow,
so be sure to tell someone you love them...
the saddest part isn't that with each passing day
that i feel like i need you more,
but the fact that you may not even need me
at all,
after a while you learn the difference between
holding a hand and falling in love,
you begin to learn that a kiss doesn't always
mean something,
and that promises can be broken just as quickly
as they are made,
and goodbyes really are forever,
but one thing i can promise you is...
someday YOU'LL regret losing me,
and you'll think back and say...
**** that girl really did love me...."
Dec 27, 2013
Dec 27, 2013 at 2:56 PM UTC
you helped me laugh, you dried my tears,
and its because of you that i have no fears,
together we live, together we grow,
teaching each other what we must know,
you came in my life, and i was blessed,
i love you my friend, you are the best,
release my hand and say good-bye, please
my friend- don't you cry.. i promise you this
is not the end 'cause like i said.. you are my
friend and i shall see you in the next life..
Dec 12, 2013
Dec 12, 2013 at 5:06 PM UTC