I could search the universe for the right words.
I could look through every crater of every moon.
I could put the sentences dancing on the tip of my tongue
in a beautiful arrangement.
They would be in perfect and symmetrical lines,
they would move and jump and synchronize with the grace of a thousand swans,
creating a heart shape out of themselves.
They would spin and twirl and blossom through the cold ground like the eager flowers after this eternity of a winter.
Can't you see that it is a bouquet, a ballet, and a declaration all in one?
Each letter would be tied perfectly in its place with a silver ribbon.
And it would still not be enough to express how much of a gift you are to me.
The way I see it,
you are as safe as you are warm.
You are as vibrant as you are beautiful.
You are as patient as you are kind.
Each moment with you is like opening a present.
Your feet leave a trail of with each step you take.
Music notes follow you around like they do with a character in some cartoon I used to watch as a child.
Your smile is contagious and leaves everyone's cheeks hurting.
A color banner that reads "happy" finds it way above the head of every person you share a laugh with.
And I will always, always celebrate knowing you.
You, my dear, my gift, my sweet love,
are something to look forward to and something to be
immensely,
truly,
and eternally
grateful for.
Apr 14, 2018
Apr 14, 2018 at 7:00 PM UTC
i haven't finished reading the story of us
but it feels as though
you have stopped following the words
that bring us together
our story has collected dust
it remains on a shelf
ignored, untouched
recognized from time to time, but never opened
by your dancing hands
but you see my dear,
i carry around my copy like it is
a flower that is incapable of wilting
the pages fill me with wonder
the mystery leaves me eager for the next chapter
you will always be my most favorite character
you will always be dog-eared
my waiting love for you is tucked away in the creases
i would fill a library with all the words i have to say to you
if only
if only i could be booksmart
and untangle this plot
Feb 27, 2018
Feb 27, 2018 at 9:38 PM UTC
Step, step, step.
I cry out,
"Today I am hurting."
Stop, stop, stop.
"Breathe," said a voice in my head. And so I did.
I looked up to the sky, saw the clouds, the cool blue, and got swept up and away like a little feather.
"There is still so much to be grateful for," said the voice.
I intend to keep listening for the sound of love.
Feb 26, 2018
Feb 26, 2018 at 8:23 PM UTC
i am so glad that you are the kind of person
who doesn't mind bad poetry.
i am so thankful you are the kind of person
who believes in chivalry.
i am so glad you are the kind of person
who holds doors,
who buys me tea,
who makes sure the umbrella is above my head,
who saves space for me on the sidewalk.
i am so thankful for the kind of person you are.
never change your heart, songbird.
never change.
Feb 18, 2018
Feb 18, 2018 at 3:41 PM UTC
You sought after, sparkling, shining ornament, you.
Hasn't anyone ever told you that you have diamonds for eyes?
When I say diamonds, what I really mean is a room full of mirrors.
Walls and ceilings and their endless streams of crystal laughter.
It echoes until I picture myself pulling my own hair out.
I grimace at the thought of the pain, so I braid it instead.
There's a surface harmony, I'd say.
If we were to wear our feelings as clothing,
you'd fit into an ensemble of red and roaring pride.
As for me, I'd find myself in the green shades of
hand-me-down jealousy.
When I say jealousy, what I really mean is
watching the boy I like look at you like you are Mount Everest
makes me feel like an anthill.
When he invites his best friend to join him and I for lunch
so "things don't get awkward" and asks me how you are doing
like you are a symphony
makes me feel like elevator music.
And when I say elevator music, what I really mean is
mindless, empty, nothing.
Unnoticeable.
Unappreciated.
Unworthy of being listened to.
He hears me, sure. But, he doesn't listen.
And that is not your fault.
You are not the one who broke my heart.
You are not the one who used distance as a weapon.
You are not the one who didn't care how it affected me.
You are not the one who didn't love me;
he is.
Friend, it is not because of you that I compare myself to
that one book that never leaves the shelf.
To dwarf planets.
To the first and last slices of off-brand, out-dated, white bread.
It is not because of you that I feel you are more and I am less.
It is not because of you that I have a hard time
swallowing my insecurities.
It is not because of you that I feel I am in a cage, rusty, hanging.
It is not because of you that I feel jealous.
That I feel unnoticeable,
unappreciated,
unworthy of being listened to.
It is because I have allowed myself to feel that way.
It is because of me.
Our friendship is a house I forget to clean,
a garden I have not watered in weeks.
Tell me, how else can fresh air ever come in
if you don't open the windows?
Please, forgive me for the achey, cold moments
where my "never mind" translated into "you made this mess".
You did not make this mess.
You did not make this mess, but you are complex.
And when I say complex, what I really mean is
you are paintings of baby cherubs and roses
on dome ceilings.
You take your time; I can be impatient.
Yet, my dear, dear friend,
your result is a masterpiece.
Friendship is a fine art and deserves to be treated as such.
And I
am so, so
sorry.
Nov 23, 2017
Nov 23, 2017 at 10:52 PM UTC
hi, yes
hello
what a pleasure it is to see you again
you look great
you look so soft in that sweater
i wish i could actually tell you that
like out loud
but like,
that'd be weird right?
no, no
yeah, of course it would be
we're just
friends
after all
oh you want to get to know me better?
what an honor!
i am so very glad that you do
just don't run away if i make things too awkward
just don't run away when i can't think of anything to say
just don't fall in love with me
if you are falling in with a rope in your hands
you know, in case you feel like climbing back out
and stuff...
just don't do it
please
okay?
Nov 8, 2017
Nov 8, 2017 at 5:46 PM UTC
today is the day
that i turn a year older than i was just last night
the digits have rounded their corner
and i am fortunate enough to see
the beginning of my second decade
another orbit around the sun
another 365 day interval
it's all just spinning
spinning
just like me
Aug 14, 2017
Aug 14, 2017 at 10:11 PM UTC
a freckled face:
sharp and dark eyeliner outline
the brand new skies in her eyes
and i wish i could capture the moment
she smiled at me for the first time
a strong personality:
her mother taught her
to dance in the space between
being vulnerable and guarding her heart
and i wish i could capture the moment
she took me to that place for the first time
a gracious heart:
strawberry cheeks and fits of laughter
fill the void in my bones
giving me the best kind of chest pains
and i wish i could capture the moment
she referred to me as her "best friend" for the first time
i think everyone deserves someone like the honeybee
someone who is fierce but gentle
someone who you could never find in anyone or anything else
someone who should always be followed by a round of applause
someone who plants happiness with each step
and watches it bloom around her little town
you are a champion and you help me to see that i am one too
you encourage the best parts of me, abby
i hope that i do the same for you
Aug 2, 2017
Aug 2, 2017 at 7:42 PM UTC
there is anticipation and excitement
when a song fluctuates into a higher key
and the bass line brings about a certain groove
that all of a sudden
you find yourself feeling greedy for more and more of it
that feeling of a heart happily sinking to the bottom
is your gift to me
when i catch you looking first
there is anticipation and excitement
when a story flows so smoothly with each turn of the page
and your eyes can't keep up with the pace of your curiosity
that all of a sudden
you find yourself feeling greedy for more and more of it
that feeling of a heart wandering through a sky of possibilities
is my gift to you
when you catch me looking first
it is a mutual state of mind where the two of us are wondering
where can i go with this?
where?
Dec 14, 2016
Dec 14, 2016 at 2:37 PM UTC
i haven't met someone who made me want
to write so badly
in a long, long time
this morning i woke
the same way you did
lonely never
in a box i have made my home
you go by with your day like you always do
holding onto what is innocent
and smiling sweetly at those who pass by
you don't say hi unless they do
you timidity is showing, dear
it's so awkward on me
but endearing on you
we both are fragile extension lines
on the streets
that taper and adjust
to whatever the winds may bring
this night you wore a sweater
and i stayed up a little later only to see
if the off chance of you stopping by
would stop by
it's a quarter past
Cinderella losing her glass slipper
and my priorities are exponential
yet all the encompasses my mind
is your kindness
and how it glows in the dark
i hunger for answers
although we both may be soft-spoken
i wouldn't mind the screaming
as long as it had meaning
as long as it mended to the broken
but you are older
and wiser and smarter
and more experienced
than my little heart is
still i ask, where would this take us if it could?
i ask God to hear me breathing
to hear my singing
and wondering
if i am breathing, there is no time to waste
if i am singing, then i am on my way
to something beautiful and grand and new
and if it is in His plan, then it will be you
all this is simple mush
fluff in its raw form
half of the time i don't even know
exactly what it is i am trying to convey
it isn't something that we have to say
it is silent but it is recognized
for you said it all with your eyes
slowly falling i am
drooping to the middle
and climbing uphill again
until my cup fills again
it won't be half empty for too long
after all,
we both are fragile extension lines
on the streets
that taper and adjust
to whatever the winds may bring
Nov 16, 2016
Nov 16, 2016 at 11:46 AM UTC