Remember what you said to me?
You said you wanted to hurt me.
After the mistakes I've made
with endless apologies
and giving my all to you
unconditionally
You said you wanted to hurt me.
I see you miss the comfort of the pain.
I see you still don't know how to gain.
You wont refrain from dragging me down.
You want to keep me on the ground.
After all I've done for you
how else can I stay true.
You beat me inside all black and blue.
I wanna hide
and you still want to die.
Throw your dagger
fine.
Nothing I've said went through your head
Instead
you twist your words.
I live my life in a blur.
We wanna be dead.
Well
**** me
**** me.
I'm not alive anymore.
Every part of me is gone.
I'm so drained from turning you on.
There's no way I could have gone wrong.
If I cut the skin on my body
scars will show the pain you've caused me.
There's no other way than to be
a grieving soul to fill in the hole
that lies within your heat.
After all I've done for you
how else can I stay true?
I am so black and blue
but I guess I'll try again next time.
There is no next time.
Nov 18, 2016
Nov 18, 2016 at 4:42 PM UTC
I refuse to say ' I hate'.
I refuse to live by hatred.
I refuse to live by labels!
Papers on the table,
nothing more than searching for a meaning.
Not so keen to define everything.
Keep going,
no matter what's in store.
Go, go, go.
(S.H.)
May 2, 2015
May 2, 2015 at 8:07 PM UTC
I'm a writer who just can't write.
They took my pen and gave me a sword.
I'm a fighter who just wont fight.
They have me under their control.
They took my music,
they took my mind.
I've got to find myself again.
I've got to get myself out of this grind!
(S.H.)
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 2:29 PM UTC
I came back the next day to tell you I wasn't upset.
All you could show me was your regret.
Don't forget that humans make mistakes as they find their way.
I just want to say
that you are still
my friend.
The message I now send you
is that
you are still
my friend!
I am lending you my hand.
Won't you tell me
that
I am still
your
friend?
(S.H.)
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 2:12 PM UTC
And I'll tell you this now, that I'm just trying to live and survive.
I don't want to die anymore, I just want to love myself for once.
I want to live, Live Through This.
No matter what I do to help people in the world, it seems as if it is never enough.
And all I do is keep giving, and giving.
But, am I living?
No!
I keep draining myself.
I can't help people when they don't help themselves.
That is all I ever seem to do, it is like I am glued to it.
I don't want to hurt myself anymore because there's no point in it.
I don't want to hit and beat myself up after one simple thing goes wrong.
I can't understand why people let their demonds destroy them.
If I did that then there would be no more me!
I want to be free.
I just want to love myself, survive and live, Live Through This!
(S.K.H.)
Jun 24, 2014
Jun 24, 2014 at 7:14 PM UTC
I've seen you everyday around the same time for some months now.
You are very friendly and funny.
You seem to be such a great person.
I don't know much about you, but I do think that.
When I see you, you always seem like a happy person, yes I do think that.
But now I've seen what's on your arm:
Three red lines in a row.
Oh no, don't tell me that you feel this way.
What have you done to deserve it?
What ever happened in life to make you want to die?
I noticed because I care.
I don't know much about you, but I do care.
I care because I know how it feels.
And the feeling is very real.
I would seem stupid to say don't do it, because I do it too.
Hopefully we will both get out of it soon, and look up at the night sky, seeing the beauty of the moon
and everything else.
There is beauty in everything,
it doesn't have to be what is enforced onto us.
I'm sorry that this has happened.
I do wish that there is something I can do.
But I need to take care of myself too.
Hopefully that one day, we will both realize the beauty in everything, and realize that we are both beautiful souls.
Jun 3, 2014
Jun 3, 2014 at 3:02 PM UTC
I'm not that religous.
Today I blessed the ones that I didn't like just so we could get along.
I thought that it was a good thing to do.
But the consequence was that I would have a terrible week.
Maybe I should only seek help from myself, maybe I should just not care
about them at all.
Seems to be the only way to help me.
But I was only trying to be a good person.
Well I've learned my lesson, and I have to move on from there.
Where to next? I don't know.
But I just keep going.
Keep going, further and further.
And bless the world!
(S.H.)
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 9:14 AM UTC
I wake up and I feel sick, I feel like ick!
The thought of licking ice cream doesn't seem pleasant right now.
The thought of happiness hasn't been part of my vocabulary for a while.
Maybe it was yesterday, so why do I feel like this today?
I'm still not sure.
When I am happy, I am happy.
But today, I feel ******
I guess that will just be for today.
Tomorrow will be tomorrow and I wont feel sick.
At times, I don't know how I can function when I feel like this.
I don't even know how on earth I even got through it.
Any moment I might burst.
Having thirst for water doesn't help.
But today is today, and tomorrow is tomorrow,
and I wont feel sick.
(S.H.)
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 9:00 AM UTC
Am I happy?
I don't know.
I haven't been for the longest time.
But I think I feel fine.
I feel great!
I don't hate.
The sun is out, and I'm about.
I'm not mentally rushing my day, just so I can go home.
I roam around now because I'm not missing out on something.
The days do feel longer, but I'm enjoying them.
I don't ask myself when I can leave.
I don't greive.
I like seeing my friends, and the joy wont end.
I am happy.
Very, very happy.
May 7, 2014
May 7, 2014 at 2:45 PM UTC
Leave me here.
I can't imagine what else to do with myself, or my life.
There isnt anything interesting.
The amusing moments only lasts for five seconds.
I becon for help.
I reckon that it wont work.
I'm not that old yet, and I already take my youth for granted.
I'd rant it all out, but I don't know what to say.
It's nice that you want to help.
But I'm stuck on this shelf, I need to help myself.
Leave me here please.
Don't tease me, if I nees your help, I will come to you
I can do this..
I hope
May 6, 2014
May 6, 2014 at 10:31 AM UTC