30 minute shower
20 minutes to do my hair,
Endless time at the mirror
To try and catch your stare.
You see me every morning
And you always say hello
I try to hide that nervousness
So my real feelings do not show.
You ask me simple questions
And i fumble to answer back,
Close my eyes , count to ten
Try to get on track.
My friends all think its crazy
How ive never clued you in
They say if i dont speak up
"How will anything begin? "
Im so much more content
Keeping this inside,
What if it went sour ?
I have too much pride.
So ill stand here every morning
And mutter " light and sweet "
And hope that in another life
You and i could meet .
Nov 24, 2014
Nov 24, 2014 at 1:17 AM UTC
Laying in an ice cold room,
IV in my hand,
I close my eyes and plead with god
Trying to understand .
" im sorry we cant save it ,
But theres a chance that you could die;
I know your in a lot of pain
And Its ok to cry ".
I feel my husband squeeze my arm,
Im trembling in fright ,
Im sad and im defeated
And I dont have that much fight .
" Your bleeding into your belly
We need to operate right now ,
Continue to be strong for us "...
.....But i just dont know how.
A foggy conversation ,
And their whisking me away ,
My eyelids get real heavy
And i just start to pray.
Waking up to quiet ,
Im tired and im sore ,
Depressed without a baby
On the maternity floor.
God must have a plan for me
That i just can not see ;
Even through our struggles
Whats meant to be ...
Will be .
Nov 24, 2014
Nov 24, 2014 at 1:13 AM UTC