Mr. Burning Sun, please tell me
why when we need you, you're sleeping on the job,
why you must give us your tears on a good day,
and why you must burn our skin when we step into the glistening light?
For if you give us life, why make the weather insufferable?
For we are worlds away, what have we ever done to harm you?
Maybe it's not your fault.
I consider that when I see the warm pictures
that you paint across the skies,
your colors off the lakes
at night's fall and dawn's rise,
and your rays through the morning mist.
Maybe I solely seek those times,
for you don't do those things all the time,
only certain mornings and nights.
You have a life, too,
not just us.
Perhaps you want us to savor
the sunshine you leave us with
on the days you are gone.
May 16
May 16, 2026 at 4:15 PM UTC
How much is a person supposed to know at seventeen?
I might not know enough, because I've asked so many questions like this,
And have never found the answers
That everyone else my age surely seems to know.
What is the secret
that everyone else was born knowing,
The secret that determines where most belong,
And leaves a select few uncategorized,
Wondering if everything about themself is flawed?
How much is a person supposed to know at seventeen?
I might know too much, because I've lived seventeen different lives,
Each one an attempt to answer
These questions that I can't stop asking.
From that, I've learned empathy, rather than resentment,
Not to step in the street before I've looked in all directions,
And how to stitch myself together when my bones are broken anyways.
I know the secret; it's that it's nonexistent.
It can't be made up in words, but it makes up this system.
Who told the secret? I couldn't tell you, 't wasn't to my ear
And I've experienced enough rebuke to know not to interfere.
How much is a person supposed to know at seventeen
When expected to memorize functions of trigonometry,
All the plot lines in A Tale of Two Cities,
And all the standard lines of who everyone else wants you to be?
How much is a person supposed to know at seventeen
When expected to study all subjects
And pass all tests at once,
Except the greatest test is not written
And it's graded by your peers?
My grades are just decent;
that determines if I'm "smart",
But what I do know is how teachers feel
When they speak and no one listens,
and that perhaps, high school is just as difficult for them
as it is for students.
How much is a person supposed to know at seventeen
When all your elders say you know nothing,
because you're "too young to understand"
As you prove to them you know everything
And empathize every one of their own reprimands,
Because perhaps, you're the only one old enough to understand.
I make thoughtless mistakes on purpose
in the hopes that it makes me feel younger,
shake my head at the aftermath of those mistakes,
and do everything I can to present as the most mature.
And perhaps, from that I've learnt enough
To answer every question that could ever be conceived,
except for the most important one:
How much is a person supposed to know at seventeen?
May 16
May 16, 2026 at 4:05 PM UTC
To some people every day is a different color
Today is gray because I've had eyestrain for weeks.
A year ago today was yellow in all different shades
The fall sights and weather bringing my mind at peace
If I squint hard enough, the colors are only faded.
Countless days ago, the day is burning red
Fading into bright pink that fills my heart
I knew it couldn't be broken, but the color still faded
Not all at once, just slowly from the start.
Several days past, the day is golden
More beautiful than I ever believed love would be
Sparkling in the light is the bright pink heart
I knew it couldn't be broken, but the color still faded
Not all at once, just slowly from the start.
Many days ago, the day is a colorful static
Bright and blinding in silence as it forms a wall between us only I can barely see through
The next days the day is blue
As the wall expands faster than I can break it apart
My restlessness takes over as I run out of breath
Not all at once, just slowly from the start.
Once again, today is gray as my breath fades
As I search for the colors I once knew
But I do know tomorrow is different
A color I can't see yet, but one brighter than the others
Until then I'll wait for the colors I once knew.
Oct 3, 2025
Oct 3, 2025 at 2:46 PM UTC
You said I drove us off the road
But we never took turns at the wheel
I was there until my vision became a blur
Tried to talk as I'd slur my words
And I swerved unconsciously into the ditch.
You said I abandoned the wreckage
But I sat there as the flames consumed me,
the flames that used to be sparks.
The amount of times I stayed parked on the side of the highway
As I waited for the rain to put out the flames so I could finally see again
Don't add up to the amount of times you made me go blind.
Will I ever see color again
After you painted the sunset just to turn it black and white?
I'm behind the wheel wondering why I'm wasting my life
Trying to read highway signs while I'm color blind
And just barely missing the wrong turns
While you stand outside the car and watch it burn.
Sep 14, 2025
Sep 14, 2025 at 1:59 PM UTC
we were in love when we first met
you told me id be walked down the aisle in a white dress
you gave me flowers, kisses, all your words of affirmation
until one day you had no words left.
and just like you promised they walk me down the aisle in my white dress
they pull me as i scream my own affirmations
she loves me, she wants me she said so
but i went so far down that road
until i reached the end, my face is a mess
they pull me into my cell where i'll forever be waiting for the girl i met last fall to come back to me.
Jul 27, 2025
Jul 27, 2025 at 7:51 PM UTC