put my headphones on and i‘m gone.
cancel the voices and mute the noises.
but i still aim for the corner to keep up my rhythm
– to not get overstimulated by all the figures around me who my mind is not capable to reach out- or spin a yarn to.
it seems that it‘s just a natural reaction like a thunderstorm following after a hot, muggy summer day that steals your breath. but is it really?
i am a ghost who just floats above the abyss of disappearance.
a ghost who is invisible but opaque – like yin and yang.
i am an outsider from the outside,
but an insider from the inside.
boring and fun.
one-sided and diverse.
i am seen distorted through the ocean when it seems that everyone else keeps swimming at the surface of it.
no depth but a surface with a lack.
a lack that fixes me.
a conduit which allows the light to shine through.
a tunnel that prevents the ghost of me from plunging into the abyss of being forgotten.
… did you know that there‘s a tunnel under the surface?
when you know, consider opening the gate to it from time to time to let the light in, even if it does not seem to move the ghost at the end of the tunnel.
trust me, it does move his heart.
even on his blackest day.
May 11
May 11, 2026 at 12:26 PM UTC
my mind seems painted in blue
when no one is around.
i feel like standing in the queue
like i‘m in deep-sea water – drowned –
waiting to finally get crowned.
but the weights of ink blue thoughts tear me down,
and i‘m desperate for what‘s slipping through my hands – a silver crown.
suddenly the thoughts of light at the surface lift me up.
something familiar approaches me with the impression of me winning that cup.
… against own mind that seems to control me so randomly i could scream – scream for clarity but for eternity.
May 10
May 10, 2026 at 10:06 AM UTC