The party is over.
The guests have all left.
Stumble to the bathroom,
a pit stop before bed.
Your stomach flows over.
You’re retching up a mess.
Laying in the men’s room,
wishing you were dead.
Dec 4, 2019
Dec 4, 2019 at 4:11 AM UTC
I check the door locks,
the gas stove nobs,
and the tail pipe of my car.
I roll my tongue to make sure I’m not having a stroke,
and when I drink alcohol, I make sure to drink water right after.
I don’t sleep well because I have intense dreams of what I’ve done in the past or what I will do in the future.
I have a lot going on, and carry it all in the bags under my blue eyes.
Mar 27, 2018
Mar 27, 2018 at 12:21 AM UTC
The curtains are drawn.
I wouldn’t want anyone to see me sleeping past one for the fourth time his week.
The sun peaks through the broken half of the blinds.
A sliver of light shines across my face,
as I shield my head with a comforter.
My body is heavy and my heart’s the same.
Mar 4, 2018
Mar 4, 2018 at 12:09 AM UTC
I never thought that I’d have eyes for another,
But im colorblind so my eyes do a lot of weird ****
Feb 22, 2018
Feb 22, 2018 at 12:10 AM UTC
T-shirt soaked in blood,
Throbbing pain in his nostrils,
He needs a doctor.
Feb 22, 2018
Feb 22, 2018 at 12:05 AM UTC
I’m ****** in a California basement. The hot, stale, air circulates through a table fan.
The world melts
away.
I’m left with just my thoughts.
Usually I’d be freaking out right about now,
But the fly on my guacamole is whispering the secrets to the universe. I listen to him hum, he says that I’m doing fine. That just because I faced this blunt to myself doesn’t mean I have to have a bad time.
He’s right. Usually I’d ruin it by getting existential.
As I draw deeper into my own self I understand Plato’s perfect forms theory and collective consciousness. Or whatever.
I giggle at my small hands.
“Was I always this small?”
“Yeah. Since day one. A premature baby who’s lungs could have given out any moment.”
“Huh. Wild.”
“It takes a lot to be alive, I guess.”
“Oh hey,
That’s kind of deep.”
Feb 21, 2018
Feb 21, 2018 at 11:58 PM UTC
You used to draw on napkins in restaurants.
At the time,
I used to imagine you doing that
in a New York diner open twenty four-hours.
Or maybe in a small coffee shop in Paris.
What a dumb cliché.
The thought of that makes
my roll my eyes.
Aug 1, 2017
Aug 1, 2017 at 4:08 PM UTC
New Hampshire has been my home away from home. I know I can rest my head in the comfort of Concord and watch the stars in Laconia. I had my first kiss in Franklin, and I experienced my first snow fall in Franconia Notch. I had my heart broken in Dover and watched my parent’s marriage die in Gilmanton.
I am not leaving any of this behind.
I won’t let the memories I’ve made here die.
I’ll shed a tear tomorrow and light a Marlboro as my trailer bounces behind my Ford Escape.
I’ll miss you when I’m gone.
But I promise I won’t be gone for too long.
Jul 21, 2017
Jul 21, 2017 at 11:32 PM UTC
I wake in the morning, brew coffee, go to work, and sleep.
It's not the life of dreams but I take comfort in the predictability. Though working two jobs is killing me, at least my lack of availability keeps me from manifesting any sort of lack in stability. Consider me an absentee from the social scene and remember me fondly.
I'm not sorry. I'm doing me and if that's something you can't see, then I'll kindly ask you to leave. Just remember to shut the door softly.
But don't think the death of my childhood doesn't haunt me.
Jun 30, 2017
Jun 30, 2017 at 3:28 AM UTC
A cardinal landed on the hood of my pick-up today. It stood silently staring at me as the rain slid down the windshield.
It watched as I smoked my last cigarette and listened to Art Farmer puff away on the trumpet. The two of us shared each other’s company as the piano carried the tune.
Without warning my winged friend was gone with the wind. Flying off into the woods.
I was astounded that my companion had stayed for so long.
The small things in life are what make it wonderful.
As the feathered marvel flew away,
Without warning my life, like the world around me, became beautiful.
Jun 6, 2017
Jun 6, 2017 at 12:55 AM UTC