I thought of building myself a new home
I was getting tired of living in a house that had a roommate called hate and a neighbour called war.
I always new the house I was living in was never going to be my permanent residence
But I thought for the time being, my house earth would make me feel comfortable.
I realised that earth didn't care if I stayed in it's rooms or not because as soon as my roommate love died
Earth had already taken up a new tenant - hate
It surprised me how love could just be replaced with hate like that
Like love didn't even matter
And now hate and my neighbour war have become friends
They've been killing people in cold blood
And separating black from white like black and white TV shows never existed.
But it's not just them, they have friends called disease and hunger
Disease and hunger make it seem like it's inevitable for them to be here.
Eveytime they come they take away from my friend joy.
They leave us in pain and agony.
Our tears have become part of us that we have forgotten what it's like to live in a house with love.
This why I have to move out
So now I'm building myself a new home
A new home where I can be a permanent resident
My roommate will be love again
And my neighbour will be peace
The land where I can build my home has already been chosen for me
The owner of the land has already been looking out for me
He knows me by my name
And when the land is ready He will have me.
Sep 4, 2020
Sep 4, 2020 at 10:27 AM UTC
Judas betrayes Jesus
Me: "How could he do such a thing?"
Peter denies Jesus
Me: "Why would he do that?"
Thomas doubts
Me: "Where is his faith?"
Pharoah goes back on his word
Me:"Why is he this person?"
I judged Peter,
I judged Thomas,
I judged Pharaoh
And I judged Judas.
But then I realized I judged myself because all these men resembled a part of me,
A part that I also didn't want to be called upon.
I thought by facing the sun
And letting my shadow fall behind me,
I'd run away from that side of me.
But silly of me to think that my shadow disspaears in darkness,
To think that day doesn't come with night
And to think that everyone has the same mindset.
I realized that in life,
You will betray people.
Maybe not willingly, but you will let people down.
You won't always be honest and you will deny some things.
You will say one thing but do the other instead.
And you will doubt yourself or that you deserve goodness in your life.
As much as I adore and want to be like Ruth, Mary, Paul and David,
I can't hide the fact that
Judas, Peter, Thomas and Pharoah are a part of the story too.
Even though they realized they hadn't done right,
It was too late.
Because by the time we were done reading about them,
We had already labeled them and said they weren't good enough.
We forgot to see that they were also humans and each of them had a role to play.
So when Judas realized what he had done was wrong,
We were still stuck on the chapter of him being a bad person.
And If not Judas it would have been anyone else.
So that was his story,
But I wonder what yours will be....
May 27, 2020
May 27, 2020 at 1:19 PM UTC
He smiled at me and said 'here, take this'
It was a happy little pill of his and it would feel bliss
I smiled and gave him a kiss saying, 'thank you baby'
But what happened next forever will drive me crazy
Next thing you know I was spinning in my head
Then he wanted to bring me to a bed
His friends walked in and wanted more
So they all called me a ***** little *****
My body was numb and I couldn’t move
I let out a scream but they didn’t approve
Everything went black but then again I woke
But to them it was nothing but a funny little joke
They locked me inside of a walk in closet
So if there was a stir I sure wouldn’t cause it
I blacked out again and woke in a different place
Treating me as if my soul were missing and my body were a case
Still I was unable to move nor speak
But he still said he loved me and kissed me on the cheek
I counted five inhumane beings on top of me moaning
One was even playfully groaning
I was disgusted and wanted it to end
But I knew that after this my mind would never mend
By now it would have been a little past three in the morning
Earlier I should have taken that adorable face as a warning
When they realized I was sobering up
They had an alibi saying they’d call this a hookup
When I could finally move my mouth again
I realized what had happened and felt heavy chest pain
They heard that I was muttering words that were incomprehensible
They saw me as nothing more than a body and that I was dispensable
They came up with a plan to hide my body in a ditch
I even heard one say, 'she deserved it, what a stupid bitch'
I hit my head when they threw me on the ground
I only saw black in front of me and around
I woke up to a woman asking if I were okay
I only said one phrase and it was that 'I was betrayed'
What happened after that is irrelevant at best
All I will say is that I was nothing but stressed
This is my story and it happened two years ago today
Nailing an image in my mind that I was a targeted prey
I know now that I hold so much more worth
And I love myself more than anything on this Earth
Just know that these words have come straight from my heart
No matter how vile and disgusting this memory is, I can never restart
So I tried to make it a poem so it seems like some kind of art.
h.m.w
Oct 3, 2017
Oct 3, 2017 at 11:34 AM UTC
I believe the world is full of people.
Good and bad.
But God loves all his children.
The good are seen as perfect
And the bad as defaults of existence,
But perfection to me is a lie that you find in children's fairytale books.
No one is perfect.
The world has become a court case,
So many unnecessary opinions,
But who are we to judge the people living among us?
Only God can judge us.
No good comes from watching evil destroy a town until only ruins of chaos are left,
But no good also comes from talking about it without changing what slowly kills mankind.
To see the change you have to be the change.
It was never about watching and supporting the bad
But it also was never about judging and viewing ourselves as saints when we are all sinners.
Who are we to measure the magnitude of sin?
Who are we to compare what we would approve as a small sin to a big sin that would deserve the death penalty?
I believe everyone has a story to share.
The bad and the good.
In the end nothing will ever separate us from the love of God because God loves all his children.
And so the world is full of people
Not good people,
Not bad people
Just people trying to be the change.
Sep 23, 2017
Sep 23, 2017 at 3:55 PM UTC
dont be afraid to hurt me
with the truth
talk to me
scream at me
but baby
please dont lie to me
- p. winter
Sep 23, 2017
Sep 23, 2017 at 3:28 PM UTC
Standing in a sea of people
As a lone island
Floating around
In the endless nothingness
Drifting away and drowning
Falling apart
And piecing yourself back together
Over and over
And over again
Every single second of the day
Wishing for it to all stop
Helplessly knowing
Nobody will ever hear
Your silent cries
...
Noone could ever save you
Because how could they
Ever save you
From yourself
...
It's hearing yourself talk
And move
And smile
Maybe even laugh
But knowing
It's all an act
With noone to yell "cut"
At the end of the scene..
Because your whole life
Has become a giant play,
Where there could be
A thousand people
And a thousand lights,
There could be a thousand claps
And a thousand great nights
Still all the while
You'd be a thousand times lonely
Drowning in the lights
Drowning in the laughter
Drowning in yourself
All because
You've become too good
At acting
Like you could swim
...
Depression is killing yourself
Slowly
Every day
Every minute
Every single second,
From the inside out
Because you don't know
Who you are anymore
Except for an empty body
Defining disappointment
And a burden
And a void of fake
All wrapped in one.
...
Depression is Loneliness
Depression is Acting
Depression is Drowning
But most of all,
Depression is Me.*
Sep 17, 2017
Sep 17, 2017 at 1:45 PM UTC
Don't look at me like a perfect portrait
When my smile was sewn on
And my flaws edited out
As the lights covered my insecurities
And the flashes buried
The shadows of my demons
Within the vignettes of my life
Which were hidden in the depths of time
For no one else to ever see...
Don't touch me like I'm a masterpiece
When you weren't there to sketch my rough edges.
You weren't there to see my colors
Bleed through my paper thin masks
Onto the tile floor forever as cold as my heart...
Don't hold me like I'll shatter
When you weren't there to see me in pieces
Because darling you can't break something
That's already broke...
Jul 23, 2017
Jul 23, 2017 at 3:49 PM UTC
Currently we judge,
Looking at angles to win
Just to please your own mind.
We throw insults and we fight,
We ignite fuel to our fingers
Tapping away like it's a race for popularity.
The world spins and spins,
Yet nothing really changes
Because we just keep spinning.
But it's as if we have weaved
Ourselves into a ditch of
Despairing linear paths.
As we watch, we listen, we observe
And try to become something else,
Something we're not supposed to be.
Just to let everyone know
That you watch the same things,
That you do the same things.
But then after it all we realise
As we grow older and as we mature,
We merely did nothing for ourselves.
We just followed the same road,
We followed the same destiny
And we lose ourselves in our journey.
At the end of it all we start to notice
We have taken the wrong path,
And the other roads are too far away.
So we turn into the side-roads,
Which lead to nothing but plagued floors
Broken doors and empty souls.
Mobiles have taken love out of ***
Generations have missed out
How it feels to actually be connected.
You make love and your phone rings,
People stop to answer like your moments
Aren't precious enough with loved ones.
We eat meals at restaurants
With our families and friends,
All I see is arched necks and fiery fingers.
I wish I was in a time when we spoke
To one another about our days,
Not about a video that has gone viral.
I wish that as I grow and my children
Will walk amongst the earth I have,
It won't **** them into inevitable fates.
I don't want them to be another
White sheep hopping the same fence,
Like the rest of this miserable world.
Systems have taken individualism
Out of individuals and get labelled weird,
They give us titles like "OCD, ADHD".
I'm not either, and I don't actually have
A label to my name, yet I feel I should
I feel why shouldn't I?
After all I like to think different,
I like to think one day we will see
The clear glass in front of us.
But most of all, I truly hope one day,
We can become a better world
Instead of repetition in characters.
Jul 23, 2017
Jul 23, 2017 at 3:43 PM UTC
I wonder what it would be like to walk around wearing yourself inside out.
To show me all your secrets and your most intense fears.
To show me who you really are without the opinions of the crowd overshadowing your beauty.
To be able to understand your beautiful disturbed mind.
I wonder what it would be like to know you.
Jun 13, 2017
Jun 13, 2017 at 4:52 PM UTC
Every time I close my eyes,
I reach my happy place.
The night time is my time of bliss.
I imagine a world full of smiles across sad faces.
I imagine demons facing their masters and begging for an intervention just so they can prove that even sinners deserve a second chance.
I imagine the stars falling upon my hands,
Glowing as if they have never experienced darkness and yet stars are surrounded by complete darkness.
These stars pull the strings on my face,
Forcing me to smile and forget that just a minute ago tears were racing down my cheeks,
Leaving me with memories that only the heavens would understand.
Perhaps all that I imagine is a fairytale.
A little portion of bliss that only brings chaos that is hidden as beauty.
Maybe that's why the beauty fell in love with the beast.
But why even complain when for even a moment I feel happy?
May 6, 2017
May 6, 2017 at 3:33 PM UTC