rebecca-carter - Hello Poetry

Who am I? Seems like lately I've had to ask myself that way too much Why is that? Hell I don't even know Who am I? I know who I was before I know who I was during I know who I was after But now I, I just don't know I know who I'd like to be: The me before but less naive, The me during but with my feet on the ground so I don't hurt The me after but happier, more hopeful, more alive Anything would be better than the numbness I've done things the true me wouldn't be able to do I've done things I shouldn't have yet I don't feel remorse or guilt Who am I? Now that I'm able to smile from my soul once again Now that I find moments of peace and lightness Now that I'm not miserable, not stuck in the past Now that I feel the sun shine and warm my soul Now, I search and grab for anything and everything I can to resurrect some of that beauty and grace Who am I? Well for now I'm still trying to figure that one out As my heart rebuilds, I will try to not break all of my morals I'll try and try; I've failed more than once already I still continually ask: Who am I? Who am I?

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May 12, 2013

May 12, 2013 at 7:35 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

Who am I?

Who am I? Seems like lately I've had to ask myself that way too much Why is that? Hell I don't even know Who am I? I know who I was before I know who I was during I know who I was after But now I, I just don't know I know who I'd like to be: The me before but less naive, The me during but with my feet on the ground so I don't hurt The me after but happier, more hopeful, more alive Anything would be better than the numbness I've done things the true me wouldn't be able to do I've done things I shouldn't have yet I don't feel remorse or guilt Who am I? Now that I'm able to smile from my soul once again Now that I find moments of peace and lightness Now that I'm not miserable, not stuck in the past Now that I feel the sun shine and warm my soul Now, I search and grab for anything and everything I can to resurrect some of that beauty and grace Who am I? Well for now I'm still trying to figure that one out As my heart rebuilds, I will try to not break all of my morals I'll try and try; I've failed more than once already I still continually ask: Who am I? Who am I?

30

In the heat of the night He took her hand and hid her fright She came along, young and naive Looking back, never once a thought of leave They held on to those days Through months of hurt, a gentle haze Words of passion, tears of shame Through it all that day had came Confusion stripped them raw Cutting deep like a bloodied saw Pushed and pulled, emotions took their toll Packed his things, the taxi ready to roll The sun bore down, blazing hot and red His string drew back slow in stead A cool wind swept a chill across his arm She held on to his promise to cause no harm A somber air filled him as he readied He stopped with a stark glance at the target, heart heavy He noticed nothing but the pale curve of skin Where his arrow would stick in She smiled and said "hello dear" The arrow let out; the string hit, slap! Clear The fire whirled across the blade She warmed to him, the love they made He smiled and set the bow down He stood steady as the arrow drown Her shock came in flows of blood Her tears wet her heart in profounded flood One last time her lips he kissed Then strode away knowing he never missed She collapsed to the ground Her heart pained, no longer able to sound Days passed her in a daze It took time but she outlived that phase Bitterness came and went With others her time she spent Her wound now stitched together He is still her number one choice in forever She knows now that love jades But with keeping strong heartbreak eventually fades

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Apr 14, 2013

Apr 14, 2013 at 1:23 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

Love Jades, Heartbreak Fades

In the heat of the night He took her hand and hid her fright She came along, young and naive Looking back, never once a thought of leave They held on to those days Through months of hurt, a gentle haze Words of passion, tears of shame Through it all that day had came Confusion stripped them raw Cutting deep like a bloodied saw Pushed and pulled, emotions took their toll Packed his things, the taxi ready to roll The sun bore down, blazing hot and red His string drew back slow in stead A cool wind swept a chill across his arm She held on to his promise to cause no harm A somber air filled him as he readied He stopped with a stark glance at the target, heart heavy He noticed nothing but the pale curve of skin Where his arrow would stick in She smiled and said "hello dear" The arrow let out; the string hit, slap! Clear The fire whirled across the blade She warmed to him, the love they made He smiled and set the bow down He stood steady as the arrow drown Her shock came in flows of blood Her tears wet her heart in profounded flood One last time her lips he kissed Then strode away knowing he never missed She collapsed to the ground Her heart pained, no longer able to sound Days passed her in a daze It took time but she outlived that phase Bitterness came and went With others her time she spent Her wound now stitched together He is still her number one choice in forever She knows now that love jades But with keeping strong heartbreak eventually fades

40

Exhaustion overtakes her soul She used to fight it and her demons Yet lately she sees no reason, for life has taken toll Sun shines so lovely and weather warmed so right She found that smiles came and laughter trilled Her heart fell and leapt slightly again Yet his words still burned where they fell Lonely and broken, she stands once again to face the world The cruel world that stripped away her innocence and ***** her of pure joy The world that held her up and dropped her, dropped her flat Just as flat as her deflated lost heart But yet, she fought on And through this fight, she developed an unimagiable strength Her smile still shone warm, her eyes always light A new detemination urged her on A new phase of her life Yes life would be complete in his arms Yet away from that protection is where she learned: Life is cruel and painful but through the pain, beauty overtakes time and time again

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Apr 13, 2013

Apr 13, 2013 at 7:38 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

Exhaustion overtakes her soul

Exhaustion overtakes her soul She used to fight it and her demons Yet lately she sees no reason, for life has taken toll Sun shines so lovely and weather warmed so right She found that smiles came and laughter trilled Her heart fell and leapt slightly again Yet his words still burned where they fell Lonely and broken, she stands once again to face the world The cruel world that stripped away her innocence and ***** her of pure joy The world that held her up and dropped her, dropped her flat Just as flat as her deflated lost heart But yet, she fought on And through this fight, she developed an unimagiable strength Her smile still shone warm, her eyes always light A new detemination urged her on A new phase of her life Yes life would be complete in his arms Yet away from that protection is where she learned: Life is cruel and painful but through the pain, beauty overtakes time and time again

19

*Rivers of pain flowed from empty holes of black cane I fear the only answer may be Hidden under fallen leaves of past hopes and dreams* If you showed a care, my breath night have been spared. What you refused to do, the pain has subdued Shining so bright, bleeding tonight Tonight's the last, let it fade fast Gaves dug in, saved for then "What have you done?" You refused to hear but now act as if it wasn't there Blankets of white cover the place, ice like a stake Drove deep into my soul: others saw the coal The blood is on your hands. Here it stands You don't have another try; you lefft me here to cry! The skies are churning. Hate is churning. Where will it stop? This is where it hits the too! Say goodbye - now Imma fly I can't recall the good times at all When It's the same, brewing pain Spewing hate, is this my fate? Now here I lay, as the preacher must say The final words. They let out the birds Then play a few keys. Silence now sees. The gathering must let out. The trumpet finishes with a pout. I lay in peace; invisible has ceased. Heat warms my stone: seasons never change the tone. Visits slow but still some go. The end has come but only to some. I loved you but you didn't feel it too. Family is close but that was like being choked by a hose My hole, covered with blood and dirt, uncovered the hurt. My life put underground; what was found? Don't show remorse- that's a buried corpse. Hate now empathy. They gave you sympathy. I could've ran but that was ban. Dealt with **** my lip I bit. Then came the fall- I'd hit the wall. Now alone, corpse a covered clone. Nothing to fall on, a clever con. Am I perfect now? Or still a cow? You still see my tears, cantt hide your fears. You have your own; who's been shown? There was a plead but it was left to bleed. I'd begun to rot when you were caught. Injuries thatt will always keep. What was said now has lead... to dead. You pretended; I ended. I wasn't happy; you thought I was snappy. Now left to stay you wish to say, Let's go back to the beginning and have a better ending. It's too late, overwhelmed with hate. Where's your child? Under dirt piled. Where's your heart? I couldn't hit it with a dart. ... it light seem lame but turn the blame. Make it right, stop the fight! You have the power to be a strong tower. Send the message through for someone counts on you. Take my props, it has to stop! Give love a try. Nor one deserves to die. This find, what they need is kind.

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Mar 18, 2013

Mar 18, 2013 at 5:34 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

Depth Within

*Rivers of pain flowed from empty holes of black cane I fear the only answer may be Hidden under fallen leaves of past hopes and dreams* If you showed a care, my breath night have been spared. What you refused to do, the pain has subdued Shining so bright, bleeding tonight Tonight's the last, let it fade fast Gaves dug in, saved for then "What have you done?" You refused to hear but now act as if it wasn't there Blankets of white cover the place, ice like a stake Drove deep into my soul: others saw the coal The blood is on your hands. Here it stands You don't have another try; you lefft me here to cry! The skies are churning. Hate is churning. Where will it stop? This is where it hits the too! Say goodbye - now Imma fly I can't recall the good times at all When It's the same, brewing pain Spewing hate, is this my fate? Now here I lay, as the preacher must say The final words. They let out the birds Then play a few keys. Silence now sees. The gathering must let out. The trumpet finishes with a pout. I lay in peace; invisible has ceased. Heat warms my stone: seasons never change the tone. Visits slow but still some go. The end has come but only to some. I loved you but you didn't feel it too. Family is close but that was like being choked by a hose My hole, covered with blood and dirt, uncovered the hurt. My life put underground; what was found? Don't show remorse- that's a buried corpse. Hate now empathy. They gave you sympathy. I could've ran but that was ban. Dealt with **** my lip I bit. Then came the fall- I'd hit the wall. Now alone, corpse a covered clone. Nothing to fall on, a clever con. Am I perfect now? Or still a cow? You still see my tears, cantt hide your fears. You have your own; who's been shown? There was a plead but it was left to bleed. I'd begun to rot when you were caught. Injuries thatt will always keep. What was said now has lead... to dead. You pretended; I ended. I wasn't happy; you thought I was snappy. Now left to stay you wish to say, Let's go back to the beginning and have a better ending. It's too late, overwhelmed with hate. Where's your child? Under dirt piled. Where's your heart? I couldn't hit it with a dart. ... it light seem lame but turn the blame. Make it right, stop the fight! You have the power to be a strong tower. Send the message through for someone counts on you. Take my props, it has to stop! Give love a try. Nor one deserves to die. This find, what they need is kind.

60

In the brilliant light, he stood By the door, waiting on the hood My baby smiled, a smile so honest and true Quickly I found my way into those arms I knew Body of warmth, strength of steel Height and build contradict his feel His eyes graze my skin Over his love, take me in Unrealized and indescribable beauty, from head to toe Unbelievable and unconceivable heart, his alone to know In this look he did hold The promise of forever told A love of light and time A love through darkened slime Hand in hand we strolled the walk In the evening air we did talk Talk of play and strife A venture past to present and future life On a blanket under the star's sight He held me long and tight Match of perfection Truly one in love's descresion Lips of silk formed a like Each kiss felt deep, ever so fine Warmth encompass me, love so real Slow and deep, in passionate kiss I feel The span of forever, he sealed here Whispered come closer, we've nothing to fear Deep inside the fire grows Released from a depth so low Gentle hands soothe my hair Frees my soul in the cool evening air His gentle touch, so full of love Takes my breath, sweet lord above All worry, fear, and thought quickly disappear His presence I feel now, his presence brought me here A fire so strong it makes me glow Sweet passion taketh over when love doth show

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Mar 17, 2013

Mar 17, 2013 at 11:32 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

For You

In the brilliant light, he stood By the door, waiting on the hood My baby smiled, a smile so honest and true Quickly I found my way into those arms I knew Body of warmth, strength of steel Height and build contradict his feel His eyes graze my skin Over his love, take me in Unrealized and indescribable beauty, from head to toe Unbelievable and unconceivable heart, his alone to know In this look he did hold The promise of forever told A love of light and time A love through darkened slime Hand in hand we strolled the walk In the evening air we did talk Talk of play and strife A venture past to present and future life On a blanket under the star's sight He held me long and tight Match of perfection Truly one in love's descresion Lips of silk formed a like Each kiss felt deep, ever so fine Warmth encompass me, love so real Slow and deep, in passionate kiss I feel The span of forever, he sealed here Whispered come closer, we've nothing to fear Deep inside the fire grows Released from a depth so low Gentle hands soothe my hair Frees my soul in the cool evening air His gentle touch, so full of love Takes my breath, sweet lord above All worry, fear, and thought quickly disappear His presence I feel now, his presence brought me here A fire so strong it makes me glow Sweet passion taketh over when love doth show

38

He's in the water paddling, struggling It's so dark and cold I reach my hand out right in sight Hesitation fills his body But I'm right there, so very close... I'm right there! My hand may not be strong but it is safe My heart may nor be perfect but it is his He flails around, unable to connect his heart to his mind Does he take the hand of whom he calls mind Or swim away in hopes to be free? He calls me love, he calls me his And my heart soars and soars But every flight does end Now her calls me neither And my heart does crash In flames and pieces as he takes some time If her swims or sinks, how will I live? If her takes my hand, will it be the same? The shore is warm and inviting The sea is cold and dark Standing in his soaking clothes, will he warm or freeze? Am I enough to save him? Enough to keep him mine? I'll love him on the beautiful shores And love him more in the raging seas No matter how he chooses, my choice is made for me.

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Mar 17, 2013

Mar 17, 2013 at 2:54 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

Lost at Sea

He's in the water paddling, struggling It's so dark and cold I reach my hand out right in sight Hesitation fills his body But I'm right there, so very close... I'm right there! My hand may not be strong but it is safe My heart may nor be perfect but it is his He flails around, unable to connect his heart to his mind Does he take the hand of whom he calls mind Or swim away in hopes to be free? He calls me love, he calls me his And my heart soars and soars But every flight does end Now her calls me neither And my heart does crash In flames and pieces as he takes some time If her swims or sinks, how will I live? If her takes my hand, will it be the same? The shore is warm and inviting The sea is cold and dark Standing in his soaking clothes, will he warm or freeze? Am I enough to save him? Enough to keep him mine? I'll love him on the beautiful shores And love him more in the raging seas No matter how he chooses, my choice is made for me.

26

Silent anticipation tears her heart Burning embers blind her sight His tears, her only fears Confusion, a struggle of heart and mind Thoughts of life and death, of loss and pain A pain stronger than any wound spreads A burning moves until nothing can stop The tears, so real and new, that flow like rivers down their cheeks She only wants his touch, his reassurance, and his love She only wants to nor be the first every time She only wants to hear him whisper of his love, to hear his heart He knows nothing of her fears He knows nothing of her fears He doesn't know how she hurts, how his hardening cuts sharper than any knife Her knows nothhg of her fears He can't explain his mind but knows not of his heart This deadly combination leaves her in the dark All alone, grasping for anything and everything Hoping with all she is that her won't reject her The one person she truly loves won't reject her like the world The one girl that just wants to be free Free from her past, her present, her future Free in spirit, heart, and mind Free to be with him eternally But he, he doesn't know and doesn't know what to do For he knows nothing of her fears

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Mar 17, 2013

Mar 17, 2013 at 2:40 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

He Knows Nothing of Her Fears

Silent anticipation tears her heart Burning embers blind her sight His tears, her only fears Confusion, a struggle of heart and mind Thoughts of life and death, of loss and pain A pain stronger than any wound spreads A burning moves until nothing can stop The tears, so real and new, that flow like rivers down their cheeks She only wants his touch, his reassurance, and his love She only wants to nor be the first every time She only wants to hear him whisper of his love, to hear his heart He knows nothing of her fears He knows nothing of her fears He doesn't know how she hurts, how his hardening cuts sharper than any knife Her knows nothhg of her fears He can't explain his mind but knows not of his heart This deadly combination leaves her in the dark All alone, grasping for anything and everything Hoping with all she is that her won't reject her The one person she truly loves won't reject her like the world The one girl that just wants to be free Free from her past, her present, her future Free in spirit, heart, and mind Free to be with him eternally But he, he doesn't know and doesn't know what to do For he knows nothing of her fears

26

Smile so soft, eyes so clear Thoughts adrift none doth hear Moonlight fell upon, a glorious glow Came to life, sure but slow Sparks did ignite Brought about a crystal light Long, slow, and sweet Urgent, passionate, deep Love this true Spurred a life renewed Now from within Far beyond and in Desire for true love's face Hope to bring about one's fate Hold so strong, so sure Heart so warm, so pure Promise this I so 'Till my last breath draws through Earth to sky, sea to sea Our love will forever be Warmth so vast May it everlast Embrace, oh! Sweet embrace! For if gone, none shall replace Fly away unto the star Take this love, for love to far Hide it there but show to all For if this be foolish, may it fall Blessed be this loving heart Joined with two, never part Now and forever, we unite True lovers, blue and white From the first dawn to that far away dusk Fill the air with love's eternal musk In heart, in soul, in true love's whole Together, two hearts become full A vow never to end Pure and true, unable to break or bend With all I am, I promise thee Our love will forever be

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Mar 17, 2013

Mar 17, 2013 at 12:36 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

True Love's Promise

Smile so soft, eyes so clear Thoughts adrift none doth hear Moonlight fell upon, a glorious glow Came to life, sure but slow Sparks did ignite Brought about a crystal light Long, slow, and sweet Urgent, passionate, deep Love this true Spurred a life renewed Now from within Far beyond and in Desire for true love's face Hope to bring about one's fate Hold so strong, so sure Heart so warm, so pure Promise this I so 'Till my last breath draws through Earth to sky, sea to sea Our love will forever be Warmth so vast May it everlast Embrace, oh! Sweet embrace! For if gone, none shall replace Fly away unto the star Take this love, for love to far Hide it there but show to all For if this be foolish, may it fall Blessed be this loving heart Joined with two, never part Now and forever, we unite True lovers, blue and white From the first dawn to that far away dusk Fill the air with love's eternal musk In heart, in soul, in true love's whole Together, two hearts become full A vow never to end Pure and true, unable to break or bend With all I am, I promise thee Our love will forever be

40

Dreaming of you night and day Love consumed me, always bright Dreaming of you night and day. My heart too pure, now to pay You pushed away my very sight Dreaming of you night and day. I took your word, every line you did say Brought my eyes to shine and took new height Dreaming of you night and day. Pain shook my frame and heartbreak may Tear me apart, eternal night Dreaming of you night and day.

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Mar 17, 2013

Mar 17, 2013 at 12:01 PM UTC

rebecca-carter

Night and Day

Dreaming of you night and day Love consumed me, always bright Dreaming of you night and day. My heart too pure, now to pay You pushed away my very sight Dreaming of you night and day. I took your word, every line you did say Brought my eyes to shine and took new height Dreaming of you night and day. Pain shook my frame and heartbreak may Tear me apart, eternal night Dreaming of you night and day.

12

Home. It's more than a word or single place. Niether building nor house could capture such a definition. Home. I've never thought of it or explored the various denotations. Never have I inquired into the multiple connotations. Home. Homesick I've wandered... So lost... So confused... Home. The realization came clear and loud. It rang out against the bleak road I stood upon. Home. It's the feeling of safety, of security. The idea of warmth and happiness. Home. The dweling of love and joy, this place is within and all around. It radiates brighter than any star. Home. I found it once upon a time, this place so rare. I found it waiting. Home. I laid upon clouds and soared through heaven, in that time. That time I spent in my Home. I only experienced that settled "this is right, meant to be" feel- Once and in that time, my Home. Now I'm homeless and alone. And love, well, it walked out without any mercy on my heart. Home. A distant memory... So far away from this barren, desolate place. Home. Where is my home? Well, that is quite a depressing tale. So in short Home- It's you. Home. Your warm arms, your sweet smile, Your bright eyes, your soft touch, your silky voices... Home. My heart, my soul, my love all reside in your care. You. Home You are my home. Home. I've been homeless and alone because you are my Home. A distant memory because you are my Home.

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Mar 17, 2013

Mar 17, 2013 at 11:47 AM UTC

rebecca-carter

My home

Home. It's more than a word or single place. Niether building nor house could capture such a definition. Home. I've never thought of it or explored the various denotations. Never have I inquired into the multiple connotations. Home. Homesick I've wandered... So lost... So confused... Home. The realization came clear and loud. It rang out against the bleak road I stood upon. Home. It's the feeling of safety, of security. The idea of warmth and happiness. Home. The dweling of love and joy, this place is within and all around. It radiates brighter than any star. Home. I found it once upon a time, this place so rare. I found it waiting. Home. I laid upon clouds and soared through heaven, in that time. That time I spent in my Home. I only experienced that settled "this is right, meant to be" feel- Once and in that time, my Home. Now I'm homeless and alone. And love, well, it walked out without any mercy on my heart. Home. A distant memory... So far away from this barren, desolate place. Home. Where is my home? Well, that is quite a depressing tale. So in short Home- It's you. Home. Your warm arms, your sweet smile, Your bright eyes, your soft touch, your silky voices... Home. My heart, my soul, my love all reside in your care. You. Home You are my home. Home. I've been homeless and alone because you are my Home. A distant memory because you are my Home.

51