real-name-2-0 - Hello Poetry

I wish the world would go ahead without me I wish time would freeze for me I want the tulips to stop growing I wish death would shake my hand I want life to stop patting me on the head I wish to be captured in a moment on a carousel Just spinning spinning spinning

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May 22

May 22, 2026 at 4:41 AM UTC

Fast carousel

I wish the world would go ahead without me I wish time would freeze for me I want the tulips to stop growing I wish death would shake my hand I want life to stop patting me on the head I wish to be captured in a moment on a carousel Just spinning spinning spinning

7

I keep writing the story where my forgiveness is stitched in the fabric. Where they look at me with eyes of hope. I keep writing the story where I push them away first. Convincing myself I was the strong one. I keep writing the story where they accept me And I run away because I know it isn't true. In every story I'm the version of myself whose not disillusioned Whose wisdom is more than her joy. In every story I know what I did and I didn't think people would forget. Sitting here after is like sitting surrounded by floor plans of a thousand to be built houses. Sitting knowing that I've already built the house. I've already made my bed. And now I must lie in it. Knowing I never made the right choice to change those plans in the first place. It's drafty and it's empty. And the wind whispers over and over. I can never call this sanctuary. The furniture is in the wrong color, the paint already cracked. It smells like crack in here. I can't leave. So I stay outside in the garden. In the rain. And ignore the ugly house. And all of my shame. I laugh with them at my own stupidity. Even as my eyes burn. Even as my soul yearns. Living as a mockery just to be chosen slightly. I keep writing me as the party but the story keeps calling me a joke.

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May 17

May 17, 2026 at 11:54 AM UTC

It says the end but I keep writing the epilogue

I keep writing the story where my forgiveness is stitched in the fabric. Where they look at me with eyes of hope. I keep writing the story where I push them away first. Convincing myself I was the strong one. I keep writing the story where they accept me And I run away because I know it isn't true. In every story I'm the version of myself whose not disillusioned Whose wisdom is more than her joy. In every story I know what I did and I didn't think people would forget. Sitting here after is like sitting surrounded by floor plans of a thousand to be built houses. Sitting knowing that I've already built the house. I've already made my bed. And now I must lie in it. Knowing I never made the right choice to change those plans in the first place. It's drafty and it's empty. And the wind whispers over and over. I can never call this sanctuary. The furniture is in the wrong color, the paint already cracked. It smells like crack in here. I can't leave. So I stay outside in the garden. In the rain. And ignore the ugly house. And all of my shame. I laugh with them at my own stupidity. Even as my eyes burn. Even as my soul yearns. Living as a mockery just to be chosen slightly. I keep writing me as the party but the story keeps calling me a joke.

27

one last thing before you go you left your scarf behind ive never seen you wear a scarf not in real life you held my hand to let it go i only held on tighter let me go i wish i said that maybe i did maybe it's true you let me go but i already stopped holding this isn't really a poem, is it? no but neither were we not poem not prose not perfect no peace we never were good for each other or maybe we were too good ill hold your hand next time (i would rather hold coal)

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Mar 30

Mar 30, 2026 at 6:38 PM UTC

so this is what the ending feels like

one last thing before you go you left your scarf behind ive never seen you wear a scarf not in real life you held my hand to let it go i only held on tighter let me go i wish i said that maybe i did maybe it's true you let me go but i already stopped holding this isn't really a poem, is it? no but neither were we not poem not prose not perfect no peace we never were good for each other or maybe we were too good ill hold your hand next time (i would rather hold coal)

18

I just turned 20. I've lived way too long to be this young. And yet I'm too old to feel this young. I feel 14 and 17 what do you mean I'm 20 I was just 16 yesterday. But I feel 40. I feel old. So old. I'm not the person I wanted to be at 20. I'm not a person I wanted to be at all. But I wouldn't want to be someone else. They say slow down. Enjoy your teens. Did I? Don't tell me I'm 20. I didn't even want to reach here thought I'd be dead by now. Don't tell me I'm 20. I'll just remember. I don't want to remember. I want to something other than 20. I want to be 14. Writing my first stories even though they were **** wrecks. I want to be 17. Believing I had found home. I want to be me. Back when I thought happiness was simple. They all stand at the door. 14. 17. 5. Holding out their hand. I should take it. But I need to be 20. So I smile and I whisper thank you. Thank you for giving me 20. Anyway. Thoughts. Don't wish me happy birthday I'll just get depressed.

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Mar 30

Mar 30, 2026 at 6:31 PM UTC

Milestone

I just turned 20. I've lived way too long to be this young. And yet I'm too old to feel this young. I feel 14 and 17 what do you mean I'm 20 I was just 16 yesterday. But I feel 40. I feel old. So old. I'm not the person I wanted to be at 20. I'm not a person I wanted to be at all. But I wouldn't want to be someone else. They say slow down. Enjoy your teens. Did I? Don't tell me I'm 20. I didn't even want to reach here thought I'd be dead by now. Don't tell me I'm 20. I'll just remember. I don't want to remember. I want to something other than 20. I want to be 14. Writing my first stories even though they were **** wrecks. I want to be 17. Believing I had found home. I want to be me. Back when I thought happiness was simple. They all stand at the door. 14. 17. 5. Holding out their hand. I should take it. But I need to be 20. So I smile and I whisper thank you. Thank you for giving me 20. Anyway. Thoughts. Don't wish me happy birthday I'll just get depressed.

28

I can't cry over you so instead I'll cry over children killed by wars over children who smile through abuse over moms hating their daughters and pretend I'm crying because I care because it's just so sad the thing is I wouldn't have cried if it weren't for you

0

Feb 1

Feb 1, 2026 at 7:52 PM UTC

Oh look the boy in striped pyjamas

I can't cry over you so instead I'll cry over children killed by wars over children who smile through abuse over moms hating their daughters and pretend I'm crying because I care because it's just so sad the thing is I wouldn't have cried if it weren't for you

3

What do you want You want my time? Sure My clock stopped ticking anyways You want my company? Alright But I can't promise it will be enjoyable You want my heart? Take it I have no use for it anyways You want my life? If that's what you want I'll hand it to you on a golden platter with a smile You want my soul? Take it take it take it It's not doing me good anyways You want me? I can't see why you'd ask for that But if it pleases you Have it I have everything I have nothing All I am is for the world to take You've taken my tears my blood and my bones And your eyes plead and plead and plead Now tell me What Do you Want?

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Nov 16, 2025

Nov 16, 2025 at 12:04 PM UTC

What do you want

What do you want You want my time? Sure My clock stopped ticking anyways You want my company? Alright But I can't promise it will be enjoyable You want my heart? Take it I have no use for it anyways You want my life? If that's what you want I'll hand it to you on a golden platter with a smile You want my soul? Take it take it take it It's not doing me good anyways You want me? I can't see why you'd ask for that But if it pleases you Have it I have everything I have nothing All I am is for the world to take You've taken my tears my blood and my bones And your eyes plead and plead and plead Now tell me What Do you Want?

29

I'm like a rich man who scoffed at an orphan girl, five years down the line Scouring the streets for a loaf of bread with a crazed look in his eye and the heavy smell of drink around him His eyes are sunk in and his teeth yellow To anyone he is foul, beastly, a man so unworthy he is but a smidge on the earth A skid mark under your shoe A cockroach But to him the drink smells of regret The bitter in his mouth tastes like mourning of what he should have said His eyes hold the sorrow of a thousand memories A thousand gratitudes he should have made He is all but waiting for the orphan to glance at him And give him the fairy tale ending of forgiveness But the girl has long left the city He is waiting for a phantom And the next best thing Death

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Nov 1, 2025

Nov 1, 2025 at 2:10 PM UTC

Down the path where the fallen go

I'm like a rich man who scoffed at an orphan girl, five years down the line Scouring the streets for a loaf of bread with a crazed look in his eye and the heavy smell of drink around him His eyes are sunk in and his teeth yellow To anyone he is foul, beastly, a man so unworthy he is but a smidge on the earth A skid mark under your shoe A cockroach But to him the drink smells of regret The bitter in his mouth tastes like mourning of what he should have said His eyes hold the sorrow of a thousand memories A thousand gratitudes he should have made He is all but waiting for the orphan to glance at him And give him the fairy tale ending of forgiveness But the girl has long left the city He is waiting for a phantom And the next best thing Death

16

You visit my dreams every night You visit them to watch me Always a shadow Always in the side-lines Standing in the crowd On tiptoes your fingers in your mouth Watching me beat my opponents Bounce around the ring I was never one for softness but I'm harsher now I didn’t want to tell you I noticed you I knew how you would In your time Come to me I knew what you would say And I wasn’t sure I was ready for it I don't think I'll ever be Tonight though You’re ready, aren’t you I recognize that look in your eyes The one that has long since faded in mine I wipe the blood and sweat off my face and smile wide with all my teeth Whats left out them And you grimace You can tell it's fake You hug me, and I tear up Almost There’s only one thing I must I say You know it, and I know it I miss being you You stall A Beat a moment a butterfly's wing Unsure if you want to be honest But maybe I’ve influenced you too Because you say it You say it slowly With regret marring your face With dread lining like the blood drying upon my face and your smile With sadness reflected in your eyes My eyes reflect yours And you say it You say it Not as much as I regret becoming you

0

Oct 29, 2025

Oct 29, 2025 at 9:03 AM UTC

I wish you were still watching

You visit my dreams every night You visit them to watch me Always a shadow Always in the side-lines Standing in the crowd On tiptoes your fingers in your mouth Watching me beat my opponents Bounce around the ring I was never one for softness but I'm harsher now I didn’t want to tell you I noticed you I knew how you would In your time Come to me I knew what you would say And I wasn’t sure I was ready for it I don't think I'll ever be Tonight though You’re ready, aren’t you I recognize that look in your eyes The one that has long since faded in mine I wipe the blood and sweat off my face and smile wide with all my teeth Whats left out them And you grimace You can tell it's fake You hug me, and I tear up Almost There’s only one thing I must I say You know it, and I know it I miss being you You stall A Beat a moment a butterfly's wing Unsure if you want to be honest But maybe I’ve influenced you too Because you say it You say it slowly With regret marring your face With dread lining like the blood drying upon my face and your smile With sadness reflected in your eyes My eyes reflect yours And you say it You say it Not as much as I regret becoming you

42

You never shared your poems with me You never told me what happened to your car And It's been a week And I still talk to you in my head I still tell you the jokes I would have said I don't care I don't I don't I don't My dreams laugh at me Inviting you every day Can you please stop accepting the invitation? I swear I don't care My daydreams smirk and nudge each other Snickering and whispering Sneaking peeks at the blurry version of you drinking tea in my kitchen You've never been in my kitchen And I am not one for tea I do not care I never did Who am I kidding I let you go now Go on then shoo Please For the love of all things precious Get out I give you Permission

0

Oct 20, 2025

Oct 20, 2025 at 1:32 AM UTC

Things I've noticed since

You never shared your poems with me You never told me what happened to your car And It's been a week And I still talk to you in my head I still tell you the jokes I would have said I don't care I don't I don't I don't My dreams laugh at me Inviting you every day Can you please stop accepting the invitation? I swear I don't care My daydreams smirk and nudge each other Snickering and whispering Sneaking peeks at the blurry version of you drinking tea in my kitchen You've never been in my kitchen And I am not one for tea I do not care I never did Who am I kidding I let you go now Go on then shoo Please For the love of all things precious Get out I give you Permission

30

I still know your favorite color I still know how hard you work I still know your favorite chocolate I still know the way you write I still have your photos I still have the lessons you taught me I still have your voicenotes I still have the happiness you brought me I still remember your family I still remember all your laughs I still remember your cats I still remember how you said I love you I still love you

0

Sep 11, 2025

Sep 11, 2025 at 4:45 AM UTC

It's like you're still here

I still know your favorite color I still know how hard you work I still know your favorite chocolate I still know the way you write I still have your photos I still have the lessons you taught me I still have your voicenotes I still have the happiness you brought me I still remember your family I still remember all your laughs I still remember your cats I still remember how you said I love you I still love you

13