It is indeed a **** or be killed world.
and i for one.
am tired of being slaughtered.
Feb 8, 2020
Feb 8, 2020 at 3:57 AM UTC
I fear i do not see the point of going on.
The once cheerful meadow i had named my outlook on life.
With blue clear skies and golden beams of sunlight.
Have become nothing more than a graveyard of hopes.
With the ghost of my dreams rotting in their caskets.
I do not feel that i belong in this time and in this place.
In fact i feel i don't belong at all.
Anywhere.
I long for things well outside my grasp.
I mourn my happiness every night.
How i wish to fly.
I would fly away from this horrid place.
I would find a place where I'd belong.
If only.
Jan 17, 2020
Jan 17, 2020 at 9:53 PM UTC
I am trapped.
Inside a body that is 2 sizes too small for my soul.
It constricts me in such a way that breathing is nearly impossible.
I wish my skin could tear.
I wish it were made of something as delicate as rose petals.
For when i look in the mirror.
I find the person staring back at me a complete stranger.
I believe god has made a mistake.
I believe he bottles my soul up in the wrong vessel.
Because this body.
Although i admire its pretty face and nice shape.
Does indeed.
Belong to someone else entirely.
Jan 17, 2020
Jan 17, 2020 at 9:44 PM UTC
Not even reality can hold me
Gravity cannot stop my thoughts from floating elsewhere
Laws of physics do not apply to my dreams
Order is transformed into chaos
And the line between sanity and insanity
Blur
Sep 26, 2019
Sep 26, 2019 at 10:51 PM UTC
Depression is not a personality trait
Not being able to get out of bed is not quirky
Cutting off all your friends because you think they hate you is not fun
Wanting to. Succeed but not having the motivation is not #lazylife
Drug addicitons and cutting do not make you a beautiful disaster
And faking depression because you think it's romantic or edgy is disgusting
Thanks for coming to my ted-talk
Sep 24, 2019
Sep 24, 2019 at 1:34 PM UTC
I long for soft breezes and golden sunlight
Eating lunch perched on a tree branch
Running barefoot through meadows of fragrant wildflowers
Instead
I am sitting in a classroom
Listening to the sound of the ancient a\c hum
Under the fluorescent lights that cause headache behind my eyes
Watching the people around me go on about their lives
Because their content
I am not
Sep 24, 2019
Sep 24, 2019 at 1:20 PM UTC
I sleep on white fluffy blankets
And order starbucks without much worry
I wear nike shoes
And expensive jewlery
Yet everytime I look in the mirror I see little me
The one that slept on hardwood floors
And ate canned corn almost everyday
The one who didnt know how to wash her clothes and so instead wore them to school ***** and smelly
The one that stared at expensive jewelry from afar wishing it were mine
And so I feel like an imposter
A liar
At my university
of silver spooned baby's
Sep 23, 2019
Sep 23, 2019 at 11:02 AM UTC
I hate college
I hate my classmates
I hate my classes
I hate my extracurriculars
I hate my teachers
Why am I still here?
Because society tells me as a black female from a poor family im lucky to be here
The thing is though
I don't feel lucky
I feel trapped
Sep 23, 2019
Sep 23, 2019 at 1:31 AM UTC
I wish you could truly love me
I dont want to be your play thing forever
I want what I cant have
I want to be your equal
But instead im just your toy
Undeserving of any love except what you decide to give me
Waiting patiently for when you decide to pick me up and play with me again
I don't know what I'll do
When the day you outgrow dolls finally comes
Sep 22, 2019
Sep 22, 2019 at 1:07 AM UTC