The nights are cold
and the days,
they are long.
Another sleepless night,
wondering what went wrong.
And my thoughts,
they whisper to each other
constantly, keeping me awake
as I lie in bed.
Over and over,
a cacophony of confusion
let loose
inside my weary head.
For the problem lies not
with words misused
or words misread,
but with the ones which
were more than often unheard,
and much too often unsaid.
The words are again unspoken; the feelings,
repressed, and unwoken.
I am left broken.
Shackled
and caged behind the bars I've made
for myself.
Down.
Down.
Down, I am laid.
And as the days becomes long, the nights grow colder
and every waking moment I grow
just a little bit older.
A familiar darkness comes,
creeping closer.
A harrowing feeling thaws through me.
Tapping a touch upon my shoulder.
It wears a dark cloak and holds a scythe.
It offers, like many times before
to release me from this life.
But not just yet.
For now,
the noose hangs loose.
And my wrists covered.
And the sea waves silenced
and those thoughts smothered,
just for now.
May 27, 2015
May 27, 2015 at 10:18 AM UTC
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah."
"Are you sure?"
"Uhuhm."
"You don't look alright."
"I am."
"What happened?"
"Nothing."
"You sure?"
"Yeah."
"Hmm okay"
"Alright."
So who is pity? The one seeking pity but not wanting it or the one trying to be pitiful but doesn't truly care?
May 5, 2015
May 5, 2015 at 1:31 PM UTC
Lucky are those who have found love
and been loved.
Lucky are those who bear the gift of face.
Easy is for them to find an easy case
for their own taste
- a goal for their own base.
Lucky are those who has an outstanding confidence.
For by it, they don’t live with a doubtful fence.
Freely as they get any wants in their existence.
I give away smiles, pieces of my lies,
pretending not having rainy skies.
Hiding my Breathless sighs.
Sometimes I am like a rock
too dull to feel, a surface too rough.
A sense I lost, an unreachable core,
I don’t know how to love anymore.
© 2014 Pax
Apr 19, 2015
Apr 19, 2015 at 10:30 AM UTC
Saying goodbye
To someone you love
Is like reading the final page
Of an amazing book.
As the last chapter ends
You begin to notice
Just how beautiful
And perfect
The plot always was.
You appreciate the joy
And even the pain
As you read and thumb
Through every page.
Finally understanding
The moral of the story,
You realize you've reached
The end of this journey.
Although the last sentence
Is the most difficult to read
Another great book awaits
Once you turn the final page.
Eventually you may stumble
Upon yet another great find.
Or maybe you'll return
To the book you left behind.
You may just discover
Once all is said and done
That this particular book
Was your favorite story
All along.
Mar 25, 2015
Mar 25, 2015 at 12:45 AM UTC
And then I realized,
The only way for me to be happy again,
No matter how painful,
Was to let you go.
Feb 20, 2015
Feb 20, 2015 at 2:34 AM UTC
As I skimmed through the texts that were long forgotten,
I sit and think how it all went wrong.
And now every time we meet again,
I can never really look you in the eye.
If people were to ask, what's the best memory of us,
I would say,
It was the long bus ride that we took and you sharing your tunes.
We sit in silence as we slowly fall into a slumber, it could never be more peaceful.
Till now I couldn't find a reason,
Why God led me to you
I'm pretty sure you're a life lesson,
Of how to let go and come out of the blue.
Feb 7, 2015
Feb 7, 2015 at 10:16 PM UTC
Holy **** what did I just say,
I'm pretty sure now it was a fatal mistake .
Blinded by the drug that's sipping through my bloodstream,
You're halfway out the door, God help me please.
Forgive me my darling,
I'm on my knees begging
Because if you were to leave me tonight,
It will be a flatline with defeaning beeps.
Jan 24, 2015
Jan 24, 2015 at 11:25 AM UTC
It ***** to realise
That all these feelings will be left untold,
And will be kept till all of eternity
Because we are not meant to be.
It breaks my heart knowing you will walk down the isle one day,
But not with me.
Jan 23, 2015
Jan 23, 2015 at 10:33 AM UTC
Ever met someone new and think:
"Wow, this person will drive me crazy."
A thunderstorm on a clear blue day.
Turning your entire life upside down, inside out.
And you want to jump in,
You still want to risk it.
Because getting to know them is like adventure,
An adventure that you crave for.
Jan 20, 2015
Jan 20, 2015 at 7:28 AM UTC
I've always considered myself like a grenade,
Capable of blowing everything in my path into pieces.
I have yet to find someone who would stay,
When things get complicated.
Why is it too difficult for me to understand?
Am I incapable of showing care?
I confide everything in myself,
Reluctant to let anything out, I'm afraid it will leave such mess.
That's why it's better for me to be alone,
Distancing myself from the people I could hurt.
Saving everyone from the deadly blow,
Run everyone run, I'll let you go.
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 6:46 AM UTC